Anxious.

[Mariapalmer]

I have the dentist tomorrow and the anxiety has well and truly kicked in. I struggle to leave the house as it is, wish I didn’t feel like this😣

[Minnie87]

I totally understand how you feel.

I dont leave the house at the moment either and its my daughters first summer holidays.i feel like a failure.

I know it sounds mad but i have just recently started to think bugger it,if i do go out and faint or feel awful then they can just call an ambulance!Im trying to rationalise staying in isnt the answer.thats letting the demon anxiety win and why should it spoil our lives?

How long have you been suffering? X

[Mariapalmer in reply to Minnie87]

I feel like a failure too as it means my mum doesn’t really get to go on days out either I just feel so ill all the time (I have other health issues too)

But you are right , I just hate how it makes me feel , it’s awful!

I totally get you though I think it’s because I feel so nauseous more than anything with the illness and anxiety symptoms combined!

I’ve been suffering with anxiety for around 4-5 years I’d say X

[Bunny2020 in reply to Mariapalmer]

I too have been feeling this way...I had a doctors appointment today and my son took me...but I felt like i was going to pass out the whole time...and the doctor was 15 minutes late..which meant I had been waiting for 30 minutes and I told them I am going to have to reschedule cause I think I have to go to the ER....my heart was racing, I was shaking, felt like I would pass out any minute....was pacing in the office...had to lay down on the chairs....OMG I was a mess.....I left and thought I was going to the ER but came home...and all those symptoms are gone for the moment.....going out now really freaks me out.....that was a 1pm....at 8;45 am I had to have an ultrasound of my abdomen looking for Tumors on the Adrenal glands due to all these symptoms.....anyway I made it through that appointment ok without too much suffering....but it was at the hospital I am used to.....and this other appt was at a new place...and a new doctor...funny enough it was to see the therapist and try to get valium for the great panic...LOL...how funny is that....I can't even make it to the person I need to for her to approve me valium to stop this insanity....LOL....what am I going to do now...???? so ya DENTISTs appt...are very scary even when you don't have anxiety issues....I don't envy you and will hope you make it through...if you have a valium maybe it would help before...but check with doctor as I am not a doctor.....nor do I play one on TV.....little humor there.....let us know how you do ok../????

[Mariapalmer in reply to Bunny2020]

I’m the same at the doctors , if they’re running late I can’t cope I have to stand outside and when my name comes up my mum comes and let’s me know it’s the only way I can actually manage with it ! I have some diazepam but I really don’t want to take it as it’s for an assessment to have my teeth taken out under sedation so it won’t even be that long , it’s only down the road so no car journey either but I still feel really anxious it’s awful how this horrible anxiety makes us feel ! I will post to let you know how it goes ! I just wish the physical feelings would leave me alone as I don’t even care so much about going just my anxiety says I do!

[Indigojoe in reply to Bunny2020]

Bunny2020. May I suggest that you had a "BAD FEELING" about that doctor and that your "6th sense" kicked in when you went there.

For years I used to think that my anxiety, and it was B A D, would kick in when I was someplace that was not beneficial for me.

IF that was a new therapist, and you were supposed to be a new patient, and they did not make ANY allowance for your time or respect the fact that they were late, maybe, just maybe, your intuition protected you from a really bad therapist.

GOOD therapists and good office people would have made you comfortable and helped you to relax.

YOU did the right thing by leaving, I say.

Be proud and learn to "re-frame" the feelings you had today as warning lights, that had you listened to them, when they first kicked in, you would have walked out and trusted yourself.

[Minnie87 in reply to Mariapalmer]

Its all very well me saying it,i just need the guts to do it!lol.

I seem to get stuck into a rut with mine and its so hard to get out off.almost a scary thought.

And like me you have someone who relies on you so you feel even worse x

[Mariapalmer in reply to Minnie87]

I plan to start sertraline after my dental work I’ve been on and off about the decision for a long time and I feel like it’s my last option now !

I honestly feel so much guilt not being able to take my mum places etc , makes me feel like the worst daughter ever!

[Bunny2020 in reply to Mariapalmer]

Maria is Sertraline also called Zoloft ?? just wondering....will they not give you VALIUM or XANAX....those are better for anxiety I thought ???

[Mariapalmer in reply to Bunny2020]

Yeah I think so ! They wouldn’t give me Valium for it , they’re very funny about dishing that out at my doctors x

[Bunny2020 in reply to Mariapalmer]

YES I am thinking I may never get valium again..but it was the ONLY thing that was working for me...the ER gave me only 7 pills....and I took half of one each time I had a panic attack...and they worked so good.....It makes me so mad that they won't prescribe them very much......my 96 year old neighbor has been on XANAX 3 pills a day for 20 years....and she is 96 and very healthy .....the concern is unwarranted over the XANAX and VALIUM...they are much safer drugs than SSRIs

[Mariapalmer in reply to Bunny2020]

Yeah I was offered it once before for an occasion I didn’t end up using it but was told it was strictly a one off and I wouldn’t get it again ! X

[Minnie87 in reply to Mariapalmer]

You mustn’t feel that way.its not your fault.and you will get better.it just takes time and some courage.

Im going to try sertraline too.i had it prescribed recently.let me know how you get on x

[Mariapalmer in reply to Minnie87]

I know but I do I can’t help but feel guilty and useless 😣

I will do , I’m very nervous about starting it because of side affects but if I don’t try I’ll never know x

[Minnie87 in reply to Mariapalmer]

I feel the same way you do.

I sat my daughter down tonight(shes 5) and tried in the best way to explain mummy wasnt feeling too well at the moment.

Its so hard but we will get over this.

Im the same with taking any medicine.thats another symptom of anxiety.fear of medicine.it never ends! X

[Mariapalmer in reply to Minnie87]

My sister had to do the same with my niece she’s only 4 , she knows her auntie isn’t too well but it’s nothing to worry about she jus can’t do everything everyone else does!

It’s a fear of mine too 😣x

[Jeff1943 in reply to Minnie87]

Minnie, if you go outdoors there's no reason to believe you're going to faint or feel awful. That's just anxiety whispering in your ear and anxiety is a liar. You will be perfectly safe and so will your daughter.

Your mind has sensed that you have anxiety and thinks there are dangers out there (like dinosaurs on the prowl) and thinks it's being helpful by making you want to stay in the 'safety' of your cave/home. But there are no dangers out there, absolutely no reason not to go shopping, go for a walk in the park with your daughter and afterwards a bite to eat at Burger King. Why not?

O.K. so you may feel a bit nervous. But so what, what's so terrible about feeling a few butterflies? Just accept the anxiety if it comes, accept it completely for the time being. And once you're out the door imagine you're floating along effortlessly propelled by some unseen force. Remember, you'll probably have a push chair to steady yourself if you need it.

You can forget completely about collapsing and some nice passer by calling an ambulance, it's simply not going to happen, absolutely no physical or mental reason that you should faint or collapse. And you know very well that if you do feel anxious and accept it for the moment then next time it's going to be a lot easier.

So don't let the phantom dinosaurs keep you imprisoned in your home, they died out years ago. Just take a few deep breaths, breathe out slowly, and go for it just like you did before this agoraphobia started. How many times have you heard: do what you fear and the death of fear is assured?

So give yourself and your daughter a treat, head for the swing park and then on for one of Burger King's finest or Macdonalds if you must. Why not try it.

[Minnie87 in reply to Jeff1943]

Thank you Jeff.as always.I’m going to screenshot that and refer back to it.

I feel like I’m lightheaded 24/7 at the moment amongst adrenaline surges and butterflies in my tummy.just need to think of your wise words and accept this for what it is x

[Indigojoe in reply to Minnie87]

Minnie what is on the back of your mind 24/7 that makes the butterflies surge?

[Minnie87 in reply to Indigojoe]

I just dont really know.i guess something must be bothering me.i have an idea.

[Jeff1943]

Maria, dentists are nothing to fear these days, modern anasthetics ensure everything is painless. I've had three crowns fitted recently including a 2 hour root canal procedure, I didn't feel a thing. In fact I fell asleep during the procedure😄. You probably won't need anything like that anyway. You've nothing to worry about, believe me.

[Mariapalmer in reply to Jeff1943]

I’m not even worried about pain this is why I’m so annoyed about feeling so anxious! I’m going for an assessment to have 2 teeth pulled under sedation x

[Bunny2020 in reply to Mariapalmer]

Maria i know what you mean....it is not the fear of the Pain or procedure it is just the experience of being there....at least that is how it feels to me....and JEFF in my case...I DO PASS OUT....so I do have a very real fear of that....I know most people don't pass out with anxiety and my doctors are not done with the battery of tests yet....but YES indeed I DO actually pass out.....and I am afraid of it....so some people do have that fear for legititmate reasons....and even the feeling of passing out is very scary even if you don't actually go all the way out.....anyway just wanted to say that

[Mariapalmer in reply to Bunny2020]

Yesss! That’s exactly it I could never think how to explain it but yeah it’s just the experience of being there and going through the symptoms the emotions the whole situation , it’s awful! I’ve never actually passed out but a lot I do feel like I’ll vomit and it’s been where my eyes go funny , I used to be a faint child so I know the feeling well, it never bothered me as a child though as I didn’t really understand it wasn’t due to anxiety was just an unlucky kid 😂

[Jeff1943 in reply to Bunny2020]

Sorry to hear that you actually pass out, Bunny, I suppose I should have said it's highly unlikely you'll pass out because most people with agoraphobia don't.

What makes me angry is the way almost the entire medical profession have got the wind up about prescribing valium/diazepam. I first came across it back in the 1970s and I think it's magic, it gives instant relief from the symptoms of anxiety. Even if they prescribe it on a 'take only when needed' basis it would help so many people and there's no reason why someone can't take a course if it for a month. Doctors seem to think we're going to turn into raving addicts if they prescribe them forgetting it's one of the most valuable anxiety meds in existence.

Back in the 1970s I took three 2.5mg of diazepam every day for 18 months. It never lost its effectiveness and there were zero side effects. Of course when I decided to come off it cold turkey style I felt bad but I had the sense to taper them off very slowly over 3 months.

I still take them occasionally (my anxuety disorder is inherited so it sometimes returns) and my last 4 doctors consider I'm a 'responsible user' so they prescribe me 28x5mg diazepam when I ask but I never take 5mg I break them in half.

I prefer not to use them too much because as an advocat of Claire Weekes' acceptance method I know they're not really necessary.

I'll end with a true quote from Tallulah Bankhead, the 1930s movie actress: "I can assure you that cocaine is not in the least addictive and I should know because I've been using it for 15 years."

[Bunny2020 in reply to Jeff1943]

LOL Jeff about the quote.....Yes i had 7 Valium and I split them into 1/2 or 1/4 as I wanted to use the lowest amount....it worked amazingly to stop an attack in about 5 minutes....I am just hoping I can find a Doctor other than the ER doctor to prescribe it....I have a few leads now from google....but most of them are PAY out of pocket Psych clinics...and 300.00 per visit....OUCH....I am on medicaid....and they don't accept that or any insurance...but I may have to find a way....until they can figure out what is making me pass out "ADRENALS" and find a cure Surgery or Pills then I need somthing to stop the attacks in the meantime....valium seemed pretty safe to me...at least in the low doses i was taking..and only as needed basis....I really needed one today.....the pain is great when going out and trying to get things done and your body refuses to cooperate with your mind....my mind definitely wants to do these things..but my body goes into shock mode.....

[Bunny2020 in reply to Bunny2020]

By the way Jeff who gives you the VALIUM now.?? your PCP or a psych doctor ???

[Jeff1943 in reply to Bunny2020]

I'm in the U.K., all medical care is free here funded by National Insurance payments automatically deducted from pay while you're working. Meds are free up until you stsrt work and from age 60 onwards. It's been that way since 1948.

I get my diazepam prescription from my ordinary doctor called a General Practioner. I always make the point that I'm a 'responsible user' and know the dangers of continual use etc etc. I think it's worth convincing a doctor of that, it's really only an issue when they change my G.P.

I did spend a thousand pounds 20 years ago to go private (because waiting times for therapy can be a while) and went to the Priory Centre where all the pop stars go for psychiatric help and the gave me cognative behaviour therapy but I couldn't understand what it was all about (whereas I understand everything Claire Weekes writes in her book 'Hope and help for your nerves'). I think psychiatry is still an infant science.