PTSD and thinking I see disturbing images

[Starrlight]

Today was a rough one when it comes to my mind playing tricks on me. I keep getting triggered by what I think I see at first. I had a very traumatic event occurring long ago. I am soooo on edge right now. I keep thinking something horrible is about to occur. I need to be in a nicer place. Deep breathing and trying to be where it’s quiet. Anyone have similar?

[Want2BHappy3]

So Sorry your having a hard time today. Have you looked into a therapy dog. I hear they work wonders? If your landlord doesn't allow dogs. He'd legally have to allow you to have one?

PTSD is a disability. Try YouTube for PTSD? You never know YOU might find your "MIRACLE"??? Go look for it??? Iam....

[Starrlight in reply to Want2BHappy3]

Thanks for responding. I have a dog...but I don’t think a service dog is what I want. Maybe I will look up PTSD. My therapist keeps mentioning what happened in my life and thinks it is what may be causing my anxiety issue. It’s very difficult to talk about.

[Want2BHappy3 in reply to Starrlight]

I agree with your therapist,. Your past could have aiot to do with your PTSD? I'm not living your life....you MIGHT have to release whatever it is to FREE yourself???

My mom traumatized me by her treatment of me. She has dementia and about 90 now.

She'd always talk about how I shouldn't have been born, she NEVER celebrated my birthday because I wasn't suppose to be born, NO cake, no presents, no Happy Birthday song.

I didn't let that deter me, I would tell strangers it was my Birthday, she'd yell back "She wasn't suppose to be Born" a lady one time gave me a dollar. I felt acknowledged

I was blamed for everything, which explained my anxeity, I'm always worried about doing the wrong thing and don't want to be blamed.

Well think about it good and hard...I understand that you don't want to relive it??

[Starrlight in reply to Want2BHappy3]

You are such a FIGHTER! Amazing lady you are.

Well I don’t know how it will help talking about it...maybe help heal I guess...usually it seems like it’s a dream in another life. Does it help you talking about things in your live that have affected you? I don’t even know really how it has affected me, it’s hard to tell the whys of what goes on with me.

[Want2BHappy3 in reply to Starrlight]

Thanks for the compliment lol. I did what I had to do to FREE myself...growing up I alway told myself I would move out when I turned 18. Which I did.

When I was younger she use to send me to other relatives to live. That was a relief for me. They treated me WAY better than she did.

One day I wrote her letter telling her how she made me feel. Surprising it help,. That's how she was raised, her mother the same, it was passed down.

I chose to break the chain, told my kids I love the all the time and every birthday was always CELEBRATED/PRESENTS

How are you going to know it's NOT going to work if you don't TRY??? Sometimes we're afraid of the BEAST that is keeping YOU a mental HOSTAGE which YOU ARE...RIGHT??? Up to you, aren't YOU TIRED of being TIRED??? And FREEING yourself. At least you'll know if that's it or not??? Or write it down to yourself then throw it away??? I read that helps some??? We have a sisterhood here. I wants what's BEST for YOU. I REALLY care for my fellow being. I know what your going through. The people on this site seems to only have each other or we wouldn't be on this site??? Take care

[HearYou in reply to Starrlight]

A therapy dog is not a service dog. A therapy dog is used to visit people for therapeutic purposes, A service dog is trained to do specific "jobs" for people requiring them. Sometimes a person with PTSD might have a service dog trained to anticipate anxiety and calm a person. An emotional support dog is a dog permitted to live with you for emotional support and is documented by a psychiatrist that you need one to help with your anxiety, etc. Only a service dog is permitted to enter stores, travel unconditionally, etc.

People sometimes confuse the terms, and purpose of each type of dog.

[Agora1 in reply to HearYou]

Thank you HearYou, I did not know that...another learning experience. xx

[HearYou in reply to Agora1]

Thanks. I know it can be confusing unless one has a specific need. And this business of people carrying diapered ducks on airlines as emotional support animals confuses the mix further.

The Federal Government, HUD and ADA deal with emotional support animals and service dogs.....except when air transportation is involved, Airlines, etc., are governed by it's own set of rules and regulations. So, we see ducks and turkeys on the news on airlines??? Think a warm fuzzy toy duck or turkey would do as well ?

On the ground and ships, only dogs and miniature horses are usually recognized as a service animal. On ships, I doubt a miniature horse would be seen.......would cost way too much to pay for the extra suite....and the waste box would take too much room on the outer decks where they are usually placed for a service dog.

HUD oversees emotional support animals regarding housing that normally prohibits the residents and owners from having dogs, etc. That requires a psych doctors letters and other documents showing the need.

The emotional support animal does not have right to all the common areas of the complex, etc, where a service dog has that right.

Have no idea how a miniature horse would fit in most apartments, much less how to walk it to the designated area for a dump.

My service dog attended court trials and hearings. Frequently the judge when ending the hearing would request me to stay afterward. Made opposing counsel a bit nervous if he/she didn't know me.....I would assure them they could leave; the business the judge had with me had nothing to do with the case involved.

Once the other attorney was gone, one judge would ask if I could give my dog permission to go off duty and approach the bench. Then the judge would step down to enjoy a few moments of stressfree rubbing and talking with my dog.

[Starrlight]

So much is bothering me. My hair has been falling out in clumps for months and I am tired of feeling sick. I want to feel alive! I know I do need to release something,; it just seems so delicate that it scares me a bit.

[HearYou]

Please be careful before you buy into the idea you have PTSD. Need a psychiatrist or neuropsychiatrist to do a thorough assessment for that. You may have some issues that are similar to an issue that PTSD may have.

Anything from a minor brain injury to anxiety and insomnia and lack of restful sleep can be causing some of your difficulties.....any recurring nightmares? Your hypervigilance is similar to a component of PTSD..

PTSD also has anger and violence, etc. You don't want PTSD as a diagnosis unless the evaluations strongly indicate it; you could be getting the wrong type of therapy and meds otherwise, and the impact on employment can be affected......employers may shy away from applicants who may have a diagnosis of PTSD as violent behavior frequently occurs with people diagnosed with PTSD, even though you don't have a history of violent outbursts.....I wish you the best in your efforts to recover.

[Starrlight in reply to HearYou]

Hmmm I am not violent and I don’t know if one can have PTSD without the anger and violence.

[HearYou in reply to Starrlight]

Some diagnosed PTSD do not have issues with anger/violent outbursts....others may.

My concern is not to labeled with that diagnosis if you are not actually dealing with PTSD. Like me, you may have issues similar to PTSD, but not be dealing with PTSD per se.

There is a community in HU for PTSD, and I checked it out one morning; after I had a "chat" with the administrator the next day I checked out of it.

It appeared some of the members had "triggers" everywhere and they were very not very nice when I suggested to one woman that her loss of a anticipated grandchild may be normal grief, separate from her PTSD. She got furious with me. That was anger and verbal violence, and it appeared to me that some on that venue were using a diagnosis of PTSD as an excuse for their behavior.

I could tell many were "self"diagnosed with PTSD; no qualified professional had been involved with evaluating and assessing them for PTSD. My neuropsychiatrist explained again in a rather firm tone not to return to that venue.

I frequently have severe nightmares about a truck hitting me while I am trying to get children out of the way. That is rather close to an event to what really happened years ago. But doesn't in itself does not mean I have PTSD....rather a symptom like some with PTSD.

My diagnosis is a brain injury with depression, anxiety, nightmares, insomnia, etc. And my doctor looks at the treatment used by the military for actually diagnosed PTSD members to see what seems to help with specific issues they have. Then applies them to where I may benefit from treatment for my similar issue......such as the nightmares. There is a blood pressure medication the VA uses for nightmares, and it is helping me, even though I don't have blood pressure problem.

[Starrlight in reply to HearYou]

So interesting! So you think it makes sense to work on the actual symptoms presented at the time with or without trying to get to the root cause? Maybe depends on the person? I don’t know if I should get into in therapy about my past traumas. At one point my therapist thought it was not a good idea.

[Hidden]

Have your doctor run blood work. Lupus can cause you to think weird thoughts. So can diabetes I believe if your blood sugar is out of control. There maybe other physical reasons.

[Starrlight in reply to Hidden]

Yes, thanks bloodwork turned out good.

[Hidden in reply to Starrlight]

That is good. I have an autoimmune disorder that it took them 30 years to finally diagnose. They suspected when I was in my early twenties and did not know for sure until a couple of years ago. Whatever the case, with time and treatment you will become healthy, acknowledging the problem and trying to get help puts you on the road to recovery. I will pray that God make you whole again.

[Starrlight in reply to Hidden]

Wow sucks it took so long for your diagnosis. Omg thank you for your words are full of hope and it touches me that you will pray for me. I shall pray for you too, for whatever God knows you need.

[HearYou in reply to Hidden]

My thyroid was checked out too. Was normal.

[Starrlight in reply to HearYou]

Smart. Yeah I’ve had mine check ed a number of times.

[Illboy]

Listen one thing , your mind gives you anything but its up to you whether you pay attention to it or not. what do i mean? when your mind gives you a scary past related or future related thought , just let it be , dont try to fight it , dont try to get rid of it and , at the same time dont dwell on them , just let them come , let them go . these thoughts generated out of nowhere and will disappear back where they generated . i know it sounds impossible , but you have to understand one thing , like all other skills , you also practice the skill of letting go , with time and practice you strengthen this skill .

there will be another thing you realize , all the worries are past or future related . No worry can exist in the present moment where all reality takes place . if you live in the present moment , you will be more with the physical world rather than your mental world . For instance , feel your five senses . what can you see where you are right now? how many things are there? what are their colors? what are their shapes? do you hear any sounds? if yes then how many? are they loud or faint? can you touch any object nearby you? etc . these things have always been there but we're ignored all the time. you will realize that there is much more in the world . if you get distracted , dont worry , you can always come back to your five senses . this technique is called mindful grounding . hope this is helpful

at the end one quote:

"dont bring the past up, you can not change it , dont worry for future , you can not predict it . take the present , as you have control over it"

[Starrlight in reply to Illboy]

Practicing mindfulness is a really helpful tool, have not been consistent in practice so thank you and it makes sense not to fight but to let go...thank you what you say is so helpful. I can do this.

[TruthSi72]

Hi

I’m Simon. It is undoubtedly your past. Broken down into what it really refers to, most people who suffer anxiety, stress and similar are really suffering from PTSD. The feelings that are causing the suffering begin in a learned narrrative this n the subconscious mind that is triggered every time it experiences what it believes is a warning sign.

Your subconscious is your guard dog only sometimes it barks when we don’t want it to and this makes us feel that something must be wrong and we start to play out the panic narrative that already exists for our protection.

This is the trigger and you then begin to play out the narrative even when you know it’s ridiculous and there is no need for you to be feeling that way.

If you’re tackling this on your own, which depending on the severity of the past incident and how strong and determined you are to do it will determine how difficult it will be. Notice I don’t use the word easy...this is because it is better to assume it will be a challenge...if you manage it easily then fantastic!

There are therapists who will help you and you will not even have to talk about what happened to you unless you feel it would be beneficial.

Breathing and meditation is great, along with that try doing a round of 10 breaths each day and talk to your subconscious.

“I am speaking to that part of me now that protects me and keeps me safe, I want you to know that I appreciate all that you do. But I need you to know that I am safe now, I have control, there is nothing for you to protect me from or worry about here, so you can rest now, you can be calm now and relax now, I have it from here, I know I need you and appreciate what you’re doing for me but I got this for the moment, I am confident and aware right now that I am ok...so you can let go for now.”

Try this script, everyday, especially when you’re feeling anxious. It might take some practice but it should help towards calming you.

S

[Starrlight in reply to TruthSi72]

Thank you so much Simon. I just wrote it down to get it into my head and will go over it daily.

[TruthSi72 in reply to Starrlight]

You’re welcome

I hope it helps, but remember to please go see someone if this gets too much for you. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. We all need it from time to time.

[Agora1 in reply to TruthSi72]

Nice to see you back on

[TruthSi72 in reply to Agora1]

Thank you.

Yes...I have been going through some things of my own and needed to do some self (soul) searching.

[Agora1 in reply to TruthSi72]

I understand. Looking forward to your inputs.

Take care

[datadawg503]

Yes.