Whats wrong with me? :(

[Marc0133]

And here I thought the year was getting better..

Anyway, I'm getting more anxiety over something that's quite crippling my life. My heart anxiety still persists. However now I'm afraid of getting cardiac arrest. At first I thought it was the same as a heart attack until I learned from someone that it is completely different. I also learned that someone in their 30s who was healthy got it and now it has me worried (I'm 23 btw).

Not only that but I'm scared of using words like "stop", "lock", "die", and others because I'm afraid of getting a cardiac arrest if I say them or use them. I know its VERY silly but thats how far my anxiety has gotten now. I used some of the words in my stories (I'm a writer) and it made me anxious. I woke up this morning totally afraid of cardiac arrest and the feeling of dying actually felt VERY genuine. My chest didn't hurt but I felt like my anxiety was actually going to kill me.

I edited my stories so I feel fine now but I just can't live like this! My heart anxiety has gone too far now! What am I supposed to do??? Thanks for reading.

[poetgirl2]

Hi Marc.... I am so sorry you are experiencing all of this. I have a question.... have you ever been evaluated for obsessive compulsive disorder? From what I have learned, it often overlaps with anxiety. I bring it up because I have it and what you wrote about being scared to use a word seemed like obsessive thinking, and then the compulsion would be editing the story. I am not a doctor by any means but something about what you wrote just resonated with me. I know that before I was diagnosed some of the thought patterns were really scary or left me thinking I was crazy... so if any of that resonates it might be something worth talking to a professional about of researching. Sending well wishes.

[Marc0133 in reply to poetgirl2]

Hi poetgirl2, thank you for your response.

And no I haven't but I do think I have OCD. However my family doesn't think I have it because I'm not obsessed with keeping things clean.

It's horrible. I fear that my constant panic attacks and flight or fight responses are going to give me cardiac arrest, unless I'm too young for that.

Thanks

[poetgirl2]

Hi again Marc,

I don’t think you will have cardiac arrest anytime soon but I know how scary it can be to think you might. I would really investigate the OCD link... treatment might really help with the rehabilitating thought and worries you are having. I am not a compulsive cleaner either... my husband jokes that he wants to rechannel my OCD. I am the exact opposite, more o f a pile maker. That is just a stereotypical view of OCD but far from the only way it manifests. I noticed it more in my thoughts... just getting stuck on something and unable to stop thinking about it... and then also in taking an action related to the thought and I had to take the action or I was convinced something terrible would happen. Stay strong!

[Marc0133 in reply to poetgirl2]

Oh my, that is so like me too! I always get stuck on something, endlessly think about it and that I have to do something about it otherwise something bad will happen. I might have OCD after all! I'll need to look into getting diagnosed (if I can convince my family). But now its putting me at ease knowing it is just OCD. Thanks!

[Jeff1943]

Marco, why on Earth do you think you're going to have a cardiac arrest? Try to justify why you think that at 23 you are in line for cardiac arrest. You can't can you? That's because your fear of CA is an irrational fear, you have no medical evidence to support it.

Your fear of cardiac arrest is a symptom of something else. You've probably realised that. That 'something else' is anxiety disorder. That's what's causing your irrational fear of CA and heart disease.

In order to recover you have to treat the cause rather than the symptom. Because once you recover from the general anxiety disorder all the symptoms like fear of CA will no longer trouble you.

So forget about curing yourself of heart disease. Because no matter how hard you try you can't cure yourself of an illness you don't have. You need to concentrate on healing yourself of the illness you DO have. Anxiety disorder.

For some reason your nervous system has become highly sensitised. This is probably because you have experienced too much worry, stress and/or overwork. Your nerves have have had enough and have become over sensitive and as a result they play tricks on you. Like making you think you have an illness that you don't have.

The trouble is you're frightening yourself half to death on a daily basis. As a result you're flooding your nervous system with fear and stress hormones. And it's these hormones that are maintaining your nerves in their over sensitive state. It's a vicious circle isn"t it? Sensitised nerves cause an irrational fear of CA which causes more fear which causes more nervous sensitivity which causes more fear of CA...and round and round it goes.

You have to break this vicious circle to recover, it's as simple as that. And the best way to do that is to accept the irrational fear of CA for the time being. Just accept it calmly and with the minimum of fear. Stop fighting it, fighting only causes more stress and tension. Accept it and agree to co-exist with it for a while. What happens when you do that? When you accept the symptom of anxiety you stop pumping out fear hormones - and eventually your nerves return to normal. And when your nerves return to normal through Acceptance your irrational fears about cardiac arrest cease. You're cured. No more stressing and obsessing.

That's the story. There's no reason why it shouldn't work for you.