Fear of spouses death

[philaustin]

My wife prefers me to sleep in our box room. Initially it was because I used to snore and wake her up. Now she says she cant sleep with me in case I die and she would wake up in bed with a corpse. She hates seeing dead bodies. When we discuss my retirement she wants me to keep working. I'm fit, on blood pressure tablets, and 68 and want to retire at 70, but she wants me to carry on working part time. Maybe shes hoping I die at work or out on the road.

[Hidden]

She needs to learn that there are two people in a marriage not just one, her.

[philaustin in reply to Hidden]

Not sure if that's what it needs though TimTim. Sounds like youre saying she needs to be taught a lesson. I was thinking more on the lines of "is this a recognised form of phobia that can be treated somehow"?

[Hidden in reply to philaustin]

I don't say she needs to learn a lesson but everything seems to be about her. She is afraid she'll wake up next to a corpse ? Well working till you drop I can see where she is coming from.

Go ask a doctor and see if it's a phobia, maybe he can help you. To me she sounds kinda wrapped up in herself.

[philaustin in reply to Hidden]

Got a doctor's appointment coming up to review my blood pressure medication. (New doctor wants to review it, that's all). I'll mention it then. Maybe start a conversation on the lines of "Well, what are the chances I'm going to die in my sleep in the next twenty years, because my wife thinks...". Maybe it'll start a discussion that could lead to our doc having a word with her about it.

[Cat33]

So sorry to hear how your wife feels It would be a good idea to mention it to your doctor

I know I didn't want my husband to retire because I didn't want to think we are that old he's 69 now retired last Christmas and it filled me with dread it seemed such a huge step It's actually the best thing in the world we are out all the time and enjoy life I just had visions of him being bored and missing his job but he doesn't get time we are too busy !

I really hope she can get help because this isn't how your marriage should be The chances of her fear coming true are so remote

Good luck I hope you can find a solution but talking it over with a professional will be a great help 😉