Breaking point...

[HeyItsThatKidd]

I can't do this anymore.....I cannot live like this. I haven't posted here since May,when I was diagnosed with Pneumonia...they won't see me because I don't have health insurance.....Since May I,have been feeling better but I came down with a cold 3 weeks ago and the cough and runny nose haven't completely left. I was scheduled to see an Oncologist but they won't see me.....Clearly it's not exactly what they say it is. I'm literally convinced I have a more serious disease or even Cancer....But I'm only 17. My grandfather has it and a friend of mine beat hers but I'm on the verge of a mental breakdown im gonna just let go and start crying soon. I cannot take It anymore no one takes my anxiety seriously. I had chest pains last,nice after eating Some very hot wings. After I benched the pain stop so I thought it was just indigestion. But I had another pain just a few moments ago once again shortly after eating. But the food wasn't spicy or hot and Idk where this pain is coming from but I'm convinced when I do go for the check up, I'm gonna get some devastating news.....and If so.....Thatll be it....Im gonna take my own life.....I wouldn't be able to live with it. Might I add that lately I have been worried about Dying and the "end of the world" or at least the world I'm living in. I'm really terrified now. The chest pains and all this coughing has really spiked my anxiety.....The cough is lingering like I have post nasal drip ..... I cough up mucus or something but I can't spit it out and maybe that's why I'm still partially sick....My nose still runs a little....Idk I am just convinced I have lung cancer and I cannot do it anymore.....its been 3 months since my diagnosis and I'm suffering.....

[HeyItsThatKidd]

My parents cannot fund an appointment unfortunately but surely they'd rather find a way to deal with medical expenses than funeral expenses over suicide

[jessiejakes]

Tell your mum and dad how you are feeling ! Tell them all your worries and you are feeling like you can't carry on anymore.then you can all sit down and talk and find a solution.hope you are soon feeling better and your given the reassurance you need .

[menagerie11]

Hi. I'm so sorry you are going through such a hard time. I had pneumonia 2 months ago and am still coughing stuff up once in a while but I also have allergies and that is likely why. I think it is highly unlikely that you have a serious illness. You need some support and help with your anxiety. Check out anxietybc.com. or kidshelpphone for confidential counselling via phone or on-line. When you cough a lot your chest and ribs will hurt. Try a heating pad, steam, tea with honey, pain killer. Can you go to a hospital or clinic for x-rays and to talk about your anxiety? Is there a mental health crisis line or centre you could contact? I suspect that you have health anxiety. Fear of death goes along with it. If you need to cry, go ahead and cry. It"s an emotional release and you may feel better. Please reach out for help. I did and things are getting better.

[HeyItsThatKidd in reply to menagerie11]

The only line I ever found was the Nation Suicide Prevention line who I talked to not to prevent suicide but for assistance period

[menagerie11]

Try 1-800-668-6868. Look up kidshelpphone.ca for more info. I think they are based in Canada but accept calls from the US. They will talk to you about whatever is on your mind.

[HeyItsThatKidd in reply to menagerie11]

Thank you. I appreciate your assistance

[E--- in reply to HeyItsThatKidd]

Hi there HeyItsThatKidAgain

I am so sorry you are facing a very traumatic anxiety experience being so young and feeling you have no one to help you through this rough patch in your life - please talk to someone close to you - A parent / teacher / doctor / friend : or big brother or sister of you or your friends - just let them know how you feel - not only the pneumonia feeling - but also how hurt and scared that you feel - and how much you want to be dead because of the symptoms you feel - in fact Everything that you have just sent for us to read - We All care about you and we are all worried for your health problems so please talk to someone so that you can get an adult to stand up and help you receive all the advice and guidance and medical help you so desperately need .

Be strong and best wishes . 🌹Elle

[HeyItsThatKidd in reply to E---]

Thank you very much, I'm gonna need a lot of support. Thank you for your advice

[E--- in reply to HeyItsThatKidd]

We are all in this together pal and we are all trying our best to help each other - there's no ages involved here because Anxiety hits us all equally the same way and if any one of us can make a difference to anyone and help brighten up a dull day then we are winning the fight against this dreaded Anxiety - Lets fight this together 🌹😊 xx

Elle

[menagerie11]

Wishing you the best!!

[HeyItsThatKidd]

So to anybody who has replied and sees this comment, Do you all think that I'll get an all clear when I go back to the Hospital?

[Scarhead76 in reply to HeyItsThatKidd]

I'm very sorry you're going through this, I know it can seem very lonely when no one can understand quite what you're going through. I do think you'll come out of it just fine. Colds can linger for a while and I know I can't stand going to the doctor either, but hang in there and report back to us when you hear the good news. Quick question are you on any meds for anxiety?

[HeyItsThatKidd in reply to Scarhead76]

I wouldn't do it to myself. All meds do is restrict your brain for a while....When it wears off you're worrying again

[HeyItsThatKidd]

No word.

[HeyItsThatKidd]

My Mother will think I'm overreacting

[HeyItsThatKidd]

Nope