My wife and I have been together for 5 years. Married for 2 we have two little kids - boy (who I had taken on as my own child he is now 6) and a girl (who is three and a very very busy child). My wife had had high anxiety when I met her and I honestly never knew what anxiety was. I had to learn quick. Over the years there were a lot of arguements that made her really question our relationship. I know she has been thankful for me due to the fact I stood beside her when dealing with court with her ex who is now out of the picture buying a house and providing for her and the kids. Last year was a tough year for us based off a slow economy less money was coming in so to help she opened a day home. Dr had told her it was a bad idea with her anxiety and with how busy our own kids are. We had had a massive fight back in November the night before I had to leave for work (I also work out of town 10 days away and 4 days home) she wanted to seperate. So we did but due to money and my schedule I stayed in the basement. This went on till Jan where over the holidays she had less stress with the kids and had more time to breathe and at that point had told me she loves me and was smiling and happy. After that Jan when I go back to work it's the same thing all over again. Seperation and actually moving forward about selling our home and telling me "she fell out of love". Heartbroken but had to stay strong for my kids I've accepted it. The next day after I had come to terms with it being over she calls me first thing in the morning balling and having multiple anxiety attacks saying she's sorry she loves me she needs me and all she wanted was me. So we decided to move back to where we were happy and married. Until now. Now she is right back in the same spot of saying she doesn't feel in love with me. Completely breaks my heart. I know her well enough that there isn't someone else. So that is not a worry for me. I also have to mention in the last 3 years I've been battling aggression and anger which I really believe I had under control but had to change meds because of side effects cause other issues. I have been very irritable my last days off and we had a few arguements where I wasn't ok with my reactions. So sticking with the meds might be my best issue for that. But all through our seperation I stayed positive I knew she loved me. I know she still does she just says she doesn't feel it. Im just wondering if this is because she is overwhelmed with the kids being busy, day home all day ,me being out of town and her doing it all alone. Plus I don't have a licence right now so she has been the main driver for us. Add all the Finacial issues on that along with her anxiety/depression I can imagine she would just want to run away. But for her to say she doesn't feel in love with me what do I do? A human heart can only take so much. I obviously don't want to leave her and love her to death. She tells me she feels bad and that I deserve better. I'm lost. I'm trying to stay positive knowing in the back of my mind it will be ok but I honestly don't know what to do I try to give her beaks but I am only home for 4 days. How do I save my marriage (we've been doing councelling) and is this related to her anxiety/depression?
The help will be greatly appreciated