Dying: Hello, as some of you know I suffer... - Anxiety Support

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Dying

Coopers12 profile image
6 Replies

Hello, as some of you know I suffer with health anxiety. However I'm getting to the point of finding out where this all stems from...and I think i've found it.

I'm absolutely, 100%, most definitely afraid of dying. Like i'm terrified. It's the not knowing what's going to happen once you die. I understand everybody has different beliefs on 'what happens after death', but in reality, nobody knows. I get myself in that much of a panic thinking about it!

Does anybody else experience the same?

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Coopers12 profile image
Coopers12
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6 Replies
miasouth4 profile image
miasouth4

hello again! I can 100% agree with you on this. I have this fear for the exact reason as you. And I worry about it daily!

daisy-17 profile image
daisy-17

Yes I did all the time scared of leaving my children and not being their for them terrified me, but I have learned you can't predict the future live for today don't worry about tomorrow you have to otherwise you will worry yourself sick.

laurakingsurrey profile image
laurakingsurrey

Yes I am the same I think about it way too much I should be working right now. I wrote a post about it and got a helpful response from Jeff1943 - he recommended a book by Dr Claire Weekes. Don't google death though it doesn't help at all. I am trying to read a book on reincarnation but my mind is very worried that death will nothing and it freaks me out as I have no control over it. Thinking about death is a symptom of anxiety and depression so focus on that. I have told my doctor and they started me on mirtzapine but I am still thinking these thoughts. Mine was triggered by a close bereavement but I have always had these thoughts just a little more quietly, now I can feel my heart! x I hope you get some peace

nathan022 profile image
nathan022

I can totally agree with you if you have a look at my posts I was getting the exact same message me!

Jeff1943 profile image
Jeff1943

Coopers12, you say that you believe you've discovered where your anxietystems from which is the fear of dying. May I respectfully suggest you've got it the wrong way round: your fear of dying stems from your anxiety and I will explain why.

You mention that you suffer from anxiety. What this means is that due to too much stress and worry over a period of time the nervous system that extends throughout our body becomes over sensitised. As a result small worries become magnified into horrendous problems: for example, the normal worries people have for their children become obsessive fears, people experience exaggerated worry about the possibility of losing their job or a partner - in my case it's leaks, any plumbing problems send me into paroxysms of deep anxiety.

In your case it's fear of death. Of course nature wires us to want to avoid death as part of nature's plan for the survival of the species. But because of your jangled nerves this becomes exaggerated to an obsessive fear of dying. It could as easily have been fear of spiders but your mind has settled on dying. I think it's important to understand how our sensitised nervous system tricks us into becoming obsessive about things because it exaggerates normal concerns into great worries. Over sensitised nerves can also make us worry excessively about our health, every minor ache or missed heartbeat becomes the first sign of cancer or heart attack and we end up as hypochondriacs. And sensitised nerves are very good at mimicking real organic illnesses.

So I can assure you with confidence that you are not going out of your mind, you are not about to die, you are experiencing what the late Doctor Claire Weekes called 'strange thoughts' and lots of people have them. In your case your mind has seized on the Grim Reaper for your exaggerated response. If you agree with what I say then it should relieve you of your bewilderment at what is happening to you. But of course it still leaves you with your jangled nerves and obsession with death. But there's a cure that has brought recovery to thousands of people like yourself.

It's not a quick fix I'm afraid, it takes practice, perseverance and the willingness to let time pass. It can be summed up in a single word - Acceptance. You stop fighting the strange thoughts and bad feelings, you stop constantly testing yourself, and for the moment you accept the symptoms of your sensitised nerves without adding further fear and anxiety to your nervous system. When you feel bad thoughts or feeling feel every muscle in your body going limp one by one and RELAX. Don't add second fear to first fear, stop frightening yourself half to death about things which are only caused by glitches and blips in your tired nervous system. In so doing you deny your nerves the fuel that keeps them sensitised and after a period of time they become desensitised and normal and your mind and body return to balance and tranquility. And then, I promise you, your exaggerated fear of dying will diminish and cease to concern you. But let me emphasise, your fearless acceptance of the bad feelings and strange thoughts must be utter acceptance.

That's the story, Coopers12, and it's helped literally hundreds and thousands to recover. If you want you can read the full storyvin Claire Weekes' first book 'Self help for your nerves' (published as 'Hope and help with your nerves' in the U.S. of A. both available from Amazon. I wish you and anybody else reading this post God's speed on your journey of recovery.

Coopers12 profile image
Coopers12 in reply to Jeff1943

Wow. That was incredible to read! I totally agree with you, 100%! I will most definitely get that book. Thank you ever so much!

X

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