Anyone? New here. Would love support.

[Saraclara]

Hello.

I have suffered with anxiety off and on since I was 19 (almost 49 now) when I suddenly began having panic attacks in college. I have taken medication for a couple of periods the longest being about 1.5 yrs a couple of years ago.

My source of panic has always revolved around health anxiety. Looking back now I know I have always obsessed about my health. I probably know enough to fool someone into thinking I'm a doctor. I even work in the health industry! I can't stay away.

Enough background.

I have classic GAD symptoms: tense muscles resulting in weakness, numbness/tingling , twitches, pins and needles. A couple of days ago I woke up from a nap in a panic because my lower leg was cramping and felt like it was asleep. It still feels that way and I have been panicked ever since. One of my worst fears over the years has been MS (also not unusual for GAD sufferers) and now that fear is back 100 fold). I know my mind is making things worse, but I can't seem to stop the spiral.

Sound familiar to anyone? Words of encouragement would be greatly appreciated.

S

[Mrworrymaster]

Hello SaraClara,

Please don't take this the wrong way, but I'm so happy to hear there are others out there who are so similar to me!

My anxiety revolves around health as well. Heck, look at some of my old posts and you'll see what I mean! MS/ALS are and were a huge fear of mine. I saw are/were because the fear varies in intensity in direct connection with how bad my anxiety is kicking up.

My anxiety really went through the roof about a year ago. I had some intense stuff go down, and I recently quit smoking, and my anxiety hit me like a truck. I took meds for about 3 months. But, for some reason, I always try to beat this thing without meds.

I work in the insurance industry, so I see quite a few diseases come across my desk weekly. It always scares me a bit. I must have an over active imagination too because I can put myself in their shoes and then almost feel what it would like to have those illnesses.

I think the thing is to recognize the cycle. You fear because you're anxious and you're anxious because you fear. The funny thing is that as I was reading your post I was thinking: "Wow, this person is 49 now so at least they can reasonably rule out the disease scares!" But of course, there is nothing reasonable about anxiety.

Take a breath and try to relax. If you've been struggling with disease fears for this long then you can probably rule them out.

Anxiety sucks. I understand your struggle. Hang in there!

[Saraclara in reply to Mrworrymaster]

Thank you for your reply and kind words. One thing you wrote really jumped out at me-- the part about your imagination. I swear at times it almost feels like I am an empath. Since I work in healthcare I deal with symptoms all day and it's as if I feel what they are feeling. Now I sound like a freak. 😑

Anyway, yes, I've had years of dealing with this, and the good news is there have been significant times in my life when I am strong and "fine". It does come in cycles. Like you, I've had a lot going on that preceded this. The rational part of my brain tells me that I will cycle through this but the scared part of me convinces me I have MS.

You hang in there too. You are not alone. Feel free to message me again. You'll get through this! 😊