What's happened to me

[Sarahlou635899]

So I started with anxiety last year. I have some months where it doesn't affect me at all then some days it is every single minute of every day. I get headaches, I feel like I'm going to pass out, like the ground is moving beneath me. My heart beats so hard I feel like it is coming out of my chest. My neck is so tense. I go dizzy. I get so warm. I feel like I'm going to die. I feel like my head is going to explode with the pressure on my ears. I don't want to live anymore. It's too much. I have no one to talk to, I've been to the doctors but they just say it is anxiety. I don't know what to do anymore but all I know is I don't want to spend another day like this.

[Worried111]

Hi you have come to the right place here as there are lots of people on here who understand ,i myself have suffered anxiety and panic attacks for many years,and yes mine at the moment is there every single day,its good that you say you have some months where it does not affect you,im wondering if their could be certain triggers for you that sets it off again,stressful events in your life,the symptoms you describe are very common with anxiety,they are awful i know and can overwhelm you at times,and yes we all feel like we cannot go on and need a quick answer to make it go away forever,but anxiety im afraid just doesnt work like that,the best way i have found is like many say on here ,to stop fighting the battle with the anxiety,and accept it is the way you feel at the moment in your life,take one day at a time ,try to release the panic you feel inside with relaxation,something you find that helps you even if it is just for a short time to calm the anxiety ,your symptoms will not harm you,i have had all the crazy symptoms over the years and i am still here 30 years later,possibly you would benefit from seeing a therapist as you could talk to them about how this makes you feel,you could go back to your doctors and tell him this would help you ,never suffer alone always tell someone how this makes you feel,im sure many others on here will give you some great answers to help,remember there are many of us on the same journey as yourself.

[Sarahlou635899 in reply to Worried111]

Thank you for your response. The thing is I don't know how to accept it. People often say on these support groups, to accept. But I don't know how to do that. I don't know how to distract myself and be gentle. Because when this strikes all I can think about is how lonely I am and how o can't cope with these symptoms. I've tried medication but it hasn't made a difference. I am on a waiting list for a counsellor so hopefillt that will help. All I want to do is stay in bed and cry and then I do that and I get mad because I've wasted a day and I've let it take over me. All I want to do is to be able to be do is take back a little control and relax. But I've forgotten how to do that. I feel destroyed!

[Worried111 in reply to Sarahlou635899]

Hi i think to accept it is just simply to feel what you are feeling and you have got to keep telling yourself this is anxiety making me feel like this,when you stay in bed you are letting the anxiety win,as you are telling yourself you are safe in bed ,it will be worse if i move around and get on with the day,but staying in bed only gives you more time to focus on the anxiety ,the answer is to carry on living with it ,even when its at its worst,carry on watching tv,carry on cleaning ,walking outside,making a meal,all im saying is anxiety cannot get easier for you unless you try hard to live normally while feeling your symptoms,there are many days when i get up and think oh theres the racing heart again,and im walking round my house dizzy,and off balance,but i know i must keep moving ,keep doing normal things,so the anxiety does not win,you will gain more strength im sure to move on and take back that control just keep telling yourself you are strong ,you can cope until you believe it.

[daisychained]

Hi!

Just my thoughts..

It will get better! It has before and it will again. You have to treat it like a cold or flu and let it run its course, accept youre not feeling well atm but that you will be okay soon. If you allow it to do that, it goes away much quicker anyway.

So thats the short term thing.

I feel my anxiety comes and goes because of being or feeling totally isolated. Lonely. Theres nobody im comfortable being really open and honest with, and besides -im not sure i do actually know anyone who has the time to listen to me!

Long term, i think will take a lot more hard work, thinking and effort to improve things and get to the bottom of it all for each person. Obvs i dont know your situation, but i feel a pang of familiarity and empathy when i read someone feels theyre alone esp during tough anxiety periods.

Main thing is to let it run its course, keep gently busy and calmly distracted (unless strenuous exercise works for you). Dont try to "snap out of it".

I often read people complaining that their friends and family dont understand and all they advise is to "snap out of it". You cant with an anxiety disorder but we still expect ourselves to do the exact same thing- snap out of it. I have definitely noticed that people suffering all types of anxiety disorders are often very very hard on themselves and expect themselves to miraculously get over it.

I know its so horrible

Sending you best wishes!

[Sarahlou635899 in reply to daisychained]

I am exactly the same, when I feel lonely it comes and gets me! But I don't know how to change this or anything. I would do anything to make this go away and feel better. It's making me physically ill and affecting my life. I wish I could have your positive attitude!

[daisychained in reply to Sarahlou635899]

Its taken months to feel better, it got to the point where i couldn't leave my house for months so i became more isolated, missed loads of appointments with my eye specialists etc at its worst for several weeks i wasnt eating or sleeping, just pacing my house crying constantly trying to breathe.. i didn't think id make it out alive. My first move forward was not being afraid of symptoms, as Worried111 said- they won't harm you. The next was believing this was all my iwn negative thinking. The next part is the part where i find ways of dealing with isolation to prevent serious anxiety creeping up again.. getting busy and finding my purpose. I've no idea yet, im still getting used to being outside my safety zone (home) but i have hope and seeing little pieces of progress which wasnt there 2 months ago.

Believe me, you'll be okay. As soon as you get a tiny bit stronger on your mind, you'll be able to focus on long term for now, let this current episode pass without draining you of everything. x

[daisychained]

How are you feeling now?

[Sarahlou635899 in reply to daisychained]

Sorry I've only just seen this. I'm getting worse. I've got bad headaches and neck ache and convinced myself I have a brain tumour or something along those lines. I just wish I was dead

[Agora1 in reply to Sarahlou635899]

Sarahlou635899, there comes a time with anxiety that we need a little help. A crutch per se. It isn't a defeat if you see a therapist and be put on medication just for a while. It might cut corners in the long run instead of waiting for you to be able to accept your symptoms. While you are on medication and get a little stronger in the way you think, you work on your issues instead of sweeping them under the carpet. I know a lot of people don't believe in addressing the issues causing the anxiety, I do. I wish you well, we all support you in our own way. Pick and choose what is best for you. x

[Sarahlou635899 in reply to Agora1]

Thank you - the problem is I have no idea what is causing the anxiety to be able to address and work. One day I'm fine the next I'm not. I can be fine for weeks and then it has me like this. I just have no idea what is causing it. I'm going to speak to the doctor next week about medication.

[Agora1 in reply to Sarahlou635899]

Sarahlou, I hope you get some answers from your doctor as to what may help you. All physical reasons should be ruled out before jumping to anxiety. I wish you well with your appointment. Let us know how you make out. x

[Sarahlou635899 in reply to Agora1]

Thanks. I've already been diagnosed with anxiety and panic attacks. I'm so tired today which is worrying me even more and I was so tired yesterday. I don't think tiredness is a symptom of anxiety and worry so I think there is something seriously wrong

[alittlebitofsunshine]

Your dosage might be wrong sweetie. You shouldn't be having those symptoms if you have the right dosage or the right medicine. I would ask your doctor