Hi all. I'm a 29 year old male from New Zealand and experience fluctuations of health anxiety from time to time. However I'm having a major relapse and it's probably the worst I've experienced in the last 10 years. Generally I'm pretty active with work and activities however in the past week I have been completely debilitated by it. I've ended up in the Emergency department 3 times convinced I'm having a heart attack. All bloods have come back normal and heart tracing (ekg) perfect. My health on paper is perfect.
Despite all of the tests and reassurance from the GP I find myself ending up in the dark pit of being totally convinced I'm at anytime going to have a cardiac arrest. It is absolutely hell. Then in between or after an attack I look back and think to myself well that was totally irrational and then flip back into it a couple of hours lately.
Body pains all over my body chest is the worst and hands. The lump in throat drives me crazy and the stabbing pains in the head. I nearly choke not being able to regulate my breathing and stupidly check DR Google for symptoms which in turn exaggerates it all
I used to be medicated however I became extremely hooked to benzodiazepines and could not function without them back in 2013. I basically became and addict and it eventually destroyed my relationship and work life. I now use fish oil and magnesium along with St. John's wart to keep it at bay and stay away from prescribed meds.
With this latest episode they prescribed me with benzodiazepines and I have filled the script and taken 6 over a week. I'm so restrained with them and was gutted that the GP reccomeded 3 a day considering past history. I refuse to take that kind of dose and will only take them if it's so hightend it becomes an outta body experience. I've taken 2 a day Sunday Tuesday and Saturday.
I've enrolled into cbt to refresh myself as I did it 7 years ago. I'm back to doing relaxation for 30 mins morning and night which really I should of never stopped and ensuring I still leave the house everyday.
It's a hard road when your in this state and it has frightened me this time. I guess really the underlying factor is the anxiety of death and when it will be my turn. I even find it hard to attend funerals as is a major trigger.
That's my story for now it's rough I'm frightened about the intensity and its wearing me out.