So we went to the Nike outlet and I was feeling hot as shit and I knew that almost every evening something will automatically trigger my anxiety. Well the bright ass lights weren't helping, crowd of people, felt warm but I remained calm. I ventured a bit on my own even though my chest was feeling tight and my mind was just piling on stupid thoughts. I guess you can say I hyperventilated too bc I felt like I couldn't breathe. Inside I just wanted to screen, cry or whatever. I told my bf while walking out and towards our car that I'm sick of this shit. Every time. And I mean I know I've said that out of frustration but even after 3 yrs later it still seems new everytine even with all that I know. It's like how is this different from all the other time. But I do that "what if" this time this IS the real deal? I'm crying inside and fed up but though it feels like hell, I'm not gonna let this eat me up alive. I know God is still touching me up and that's all I can hope. Anyone out there freakin feel me on this?