will I ever be happy instead of anxious?


Not posted for a while, but really struggling at the moment, I've tried everything but nothing helps so I thought I'd see if anyone else here has the same struggles as me.

I've achieved a lot of small goals the past to weeks but it just feels like a never ending battle. When will I get to be happy?!

Even thought I've been working so hard whilst dealing with really bad IBS and feeling depressed this past week, my doctor still makes me feel like I'm not doing enough. Do they think I can just get better because I've got a doctor working with me? He doesn't get I've tried all types of help and nothing has helped, why would a GP cheking in every two months make such a difference? It's just such arrogance and makes me feel like he doesn't beleive I'm trying hard enough and so I got t more depressed.

I'm also so fed up with them constantly picking at me. Like every aspect of my life has to be viewed under a microscope and judged, I'm fed up of being told ' that's an avoidance behaviour, you should work on that' on a regular basis. I've been struggling with anxiety, depression and debilitating IBS since I was six so yeah of course I've got lots of things I avoid but they can't expect me to work on them all at once. I'm a human not an octopus!

Sorry for the rant but I'm just feeling like I'm going to burn out trying to juggle so many new challenges at once and not feeling like it enough when I do achieve something, it's like I have to got straight onto the next issue and work on that. Sorry I'm not sure that makes much sense. Why is it that when I ask a doctor or someone for help they think it gives then the right to question every part of my life. Tones Of 'normal' people live lives quite happily avoiding what scares them, it doesn't make them mentally unwell to work round or avoid some things they find hard.

does anyone feel the same or am I just being ungrateful when I at least have a doctor who wants to help me? Rant over! Xx

4 Replies

  • Hi, I do feel the same not with my doctors because I have trouble setting up appointments because of my agoraphobia. I do however get phone therapy

    for the last 6 years and am not that much better now as when I started.

    As a matter of fact, the sessions are becoming more stressful then the stress

    I'm already under. For the last year, she wants me to move to an assisted

    living home. Everytime I talk with her the pressure is on. I feel it's a way to

    just get rid of me because there is nothing more she can do. I'm finished

    ranting as well...xx

  • Hi, I am sorry that you are not getting the support you need. My rheumatologist sent me to a psychologist who does biofeedback. I've learned to use breathing to lower my pulse and visual imagery so I can relax.

    I understand how debilitating ibs is.

    Years ago I had ulcerative colitis which is an ibs. It got so bad that I had to have my colon removed. If there's a place that you can soak in warm water try that. You seem completely overwhelmed. Is there a nurse. Social worker or psychologist who could help you make a plan for dealing with your complex health issues?

    I live in the USA and can really relate to what you are saying. I also get very frustrated trying to determine how to live with the pain and confusion of fibromyalgia. That's just one issue. I wanted to show you that your not alone. Peace be with you.

  • my my my Delilah welcome back to HU its nice to have you here where we can help in the best way we know how, and yes you can rant as much has you like, we all need a clear out now and again i'm Alan its lovely to have you back with us. i'm here anytime you need a listening hear, i have two so you can take you pick or shovel whichever suits you take care and yes i'm as mad as the march hare take care Alan xx

  • I just labeled happiness irrelevant. I believe people have pout too much emphasis on it, plus, happiness is fleeting. A balanced indifference is my happiness.

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