Anxiety and depression.

[Curious5]

I just feel completely lost. I cry for no reason and I hurt with body aches, muscle spasms, headaches, you name the hurt I've felt it which then makes me automatically think I'm dying I think I have cancer or some kinda disease that's slowly killing me and everyone keeps telling me it's just my anxiety and depression. I've been to the hospital 5 times had complete blood work twice, I've been to my doctor 8 times and every time they tell me I'm ok. Could something really be wrong with me? Can these really make me think like this and cause this much body aches and pains? When I wake up in the mornings I'm so sore and I feel so tired. I have no one that understands what's going on with me everyone thinks I'm crazy and I've lost many friends due to the fact that when I'm with them and my neck or back start hurting I'm in a panick wondering if I have a tumor or something that I'll die from. I know this all sounds so crazy but any advise or anyone that's been through this stuff please tell me how I can help manage it. I'm so tired of feeling this way and having no one that will listen.

[Aazz]

Considering you have been to the hospital and doctors that many times I'm sure they are right, but I can definitely relate to not being able to believe it's all just anxiety. But anxiety and depression are infact terrible disorders like any other illness and they do make people feel terrible I think people assume if it's not a physical disorder that it should some how be easy to get over but it's not and these mental disorders to produce physical symptoms this also confused us and makes us think it's got to be something else and then it turns into a vicious circle and is very hard to break out of. Just know I have felt the same feelings as you tired feel like my body is breaking down with aches and pains weird tingling sensations and shakiness. Not to mention lightheadedness and dreamy dazed feelings.

If you can try to accept that it's anxiety and depression and try not to focus on your symptoms you will see improvement but it takes a lot of time and patience and be prepared for set backs.

Look at me preaching I should take my own advice lol

I wish you all the best

[Curious5 in reply to Aazz]

Thank you so much for the reply I appreciate it I went two days feeling fine and today has just worn me down I have chest pains, heart flutters and lightheaded and it's awful! I didn't know it could cause so much pain and so tired. It sucks not having anyone that understands so thank you

[LaceyTiel]

Hello, I empathize with your situation very much. I too have lost friends - or in my mind lost people I thought were friends.... Because they just didn't feel comfortable with how we change our behaviours to one of a depressed person. The books say we should be understanding if people walk out of our lives and just try to understand that they left because they don't know how deal with a friend suffering from depression.

The tiredness and aches don't get respect from some people. They think we are just making up excuses for being lazy. They might even have a few stories to tell you how they felt sad one time but pulled themselves up by their boot straps and got on with it! But sincerely if someone does say something insensitive like that- try to understand they just have no idea of what you truly are suffering - and mean comments made by geninue loved ones are their idea of helping you. It is nothing personal against you as an individual.

Crying without reason is a very big sign of depression. Just feeling empty with no engery or hope- are other signs. Talking helps and this board will have good people who understand you and want to help. When I am on a depressive episode as soon as I get out of bed I can't wait to get home from work to go back in my darkened room and just lay under my blanket savouring the quietness. I get judged for going to work because many people in their depression can not function at that level. Like if I really really had a problem like a person diagonised with severe depression why am I able to drag myself to work 6 days a week. Well I have responsibilities at work that are important to me. Brushing my hair, brushing my teeth, getting dresses properly, cleaning my home properly, bothering not to eat just to save cleaning up the kitchen afterwards, shutting myself off from everyone, dodging people at work just so I don't have to say 'hello', hallucinationing moving objects when nothing I am told is there, trembling, fixating on every word of a conversation looking for clues to what might be between the lines- and then replaying that conversation over and over in my head, choosing to spend my time with my pets than to even bother answering the door if someone had come over to see me, being very detached and analyse my relationship with my partner to a point where I am suspicious of his true intentions where he technically has done nothing wrong(ish)... But my anxiety keeps me on my toes- yet a play the good natured doormat at all times never even letting him see my depression...

All those rambling things are just a few gifts of my anxiety and depression.

Indentifying you have an illness is very important. You are you and not your illness- if you get what I mean! An illness if just something you have. It does not define you.

Have you tried depression or anxiety medications?

I hope you are feeling better. You are very welcome to PM me if you want to talk about anything at all. I had a life time battle with this illness. And there is hope of feeling better if you just hang in there and find what works for you!

[judy1713]

Just want to let you no, I do understand exactly how you feel, And I've been suffering for about 60 years, and my mother did most of her life too, but theres new ways to help us now. We just have to keep pushing, and try to stay positive, very hard to do, I no, Sometimes its almost impossible, but we make it through, and some day we will find the right combination to get all of this under control. One day at a time

[Alexcompo55]

Hi, i know exactly how you feel. I would go out worrying about things like tumours, heart attacks ect. It gets you in a cycle. You will break this cycle. Im on tablets and they work fine. Try going to your local gp or doctors and see what they can do. I had counselling but i wasnt a big fan explaining how i was feeling but everyones different aye anyways im a lot better now. Crazy what anxiety symptoms can do to you. Mind over matter if you ever need to talk im here x

Alex