Its been a while in since my last post, I have had a good few ups and downs. During a few ups I have reduced my propranolol but after a really bad spell of depression over Christmas I had to go back to three a day. I have been feeling better lately but ma anxiety has changed, its not so much medical now as personal. I never feel good about myself. I obsess over all the stupid things ive done or said in the past. I feel really insecure all the time about who I am as a person and my anxiety feeds on these thoughts. When I first had anxiety I always thought it would be health related, going through this is hell. It feels never ending and constantly fighting the negative thoughts is sad. It makes me sad. I wish my mind was simpler and I didn't have to worry about every little thing. I just wish I didn't have to fight it all the time. The insecurity and the nasty negative thoughts about myself are tough.