Trapped in my mind: I've been suffering from... - Anxiety Support

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Trapped in my mind

Claire1996 profile image
20 Replies

I've been suffering from anxiety since last October and it started from being around friends who were smoking weed, which caused me to have my first panic attack. Since then I've had anxiety and was on propanolol for a while and taking therapy but I didn't feel like the cognitive theory was helping so stopped. My anxiety has now developed and isn't about specific situations or worries anymore. It's more about being aware of my own thoughts and feeling like I'm trapped in my own mind and cut off from the rest of the world mentally. I've stopped trying to explain it to my family because I don't want them to worry and am able to come across absolutely fine as if nothing's wrong but I feel like I'm going insane and am never going to be comfortable in my own mind again. Can ANYONE relate ??

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Claire1996 profile image
Claire1996
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20 Replies
Rachms11 profile image
Rachms11

Yep I can. Have you seen a new doctor or counsellor?

Claire1996 profile image
Claire1996 in reply to Rachms11

I saw a doctor when it first started and got propanolol prescribed for general anxiety. Then the anxiety went (when the weed chemicals left my brain I guess) so I stopped the medication, then it came back and has never really left again. I haven't been back to the doctor because I feel the medication isn't what I need. I saw my university therapist but she was delving into my childhood and if I have family problems etc and relationship problems, which I felt was absolutely useless and was making me feel more helpless as she clearly didn't understand how Im suffering as I've never had family problems. Since then I've not done anything about it, luckily I'm able to talk to my boyfriend about it but even he doesn't COMPLETELY understand and I don't want to worry my parents anymore as I feel like worrying them will just make me worry more and get worse.

cat9 profile image
cat9

The only thing I can recommend is run and exercise. I know it's really hard, I've put my running shoes on and just given up before I left the house because anxiety is such a weird scary paralysing feeling. but running or working out really helps, at least try it x

clinbuck123 profile image
clinbuck123 in reply to cat9

Or you can go for 1 hour walks in the park, I cant excercise because it is stimulating my overworked heart, 6 weeks ago I was doing high intensity weights and had too much caffiene and stress and had my first massive panic attack afterwards on the tube, went to hospital but all tests were fine, still going to see cardiologist for 24 hour ecg.

josamosa profile image
josamosa

Hi. Sounds like yr suffering from a generilised aniety disorder. Easy to get over if u approach things in the right way. First off you can choose how to feel about any situation. You have choice. Youll worry moreabout worring if u get my drift than anything specific. Hence locking u into anxiety. Read paul david and anxitey no more. Yr just extra sensitive but if u work with these feelings and stop fighting them they will start to ease. Promise. X

Claire1996 profile image
Claire1996 in reply to josamosa

Ive played football for 8 years and only recently stopped this academic year because I just started university. I'm taking it back up this summer and going to continue playing again so hopefully this will help ease it. Thank you for the advice, Its so nice to talk to people who understand x

Devinlane profile image
Devinlane

Are you smoking weed? I first started smoking weed when I was 15. For the first few years it was great. I never had a bad high. I would laugh so much get the munchies and really enjoy it. But after that I would get random panic/anxiety attacks while I was high. The good chill feelings had turned to crazy thoughts and I would work myself up thinking that I couldn't breathe or that my heart was beating fast. I think that it was time for me to stop. Maybe the bodys was of reacting and saying to quit. Or maybe it was the fact that I knew it was wrong. Or maybe the fact that I had no control over my mind or thoughts and I that alone would scare me.

Claire1996 profile image
Claire1996 in reply to Devinlane

I've only ever smoked it three times in my life and had a panic attack all three times so decided never to do it again. It was about 2 days after the last time I did it that the anxiety started, so it was triggered by that I presume. My boyfriend smokes it and a lot of my friends but they all understand I don't like it near me now

ColeMiller profile image
ColeMiller in reply to Claire1996

Avoid thc, use cbd it works wonders

Aazz profile image
Aazz

It sounds to me like you have derealization/depersonalization

Google it. I have had this for a month now and it's driving me crazy I feel like I'm dreaming and not alive but somehow still functioning. Really hard to explain..

steadfast66 profile image
steadfast66

You are not alone. You are not going crazy. Also, you will not go insane or lose control...just feels like that. The more you feel that way the more you focus on it and the worst it gets. Stop focusing on how you feel. If you notice, when you get really involved in something (reading a book, actually watching a movie, etc), you don't feel it during that time. I don't know what causes this weird dreamlike, invisible, dazed, feeling like you losing control of breathing, seeing, etc...but it's a lie. Say to yourself, "I'm okay...nothing is going to happen." I mentioned this to my sister when it first began to happen to me. She didn't understand and her comments were more damaging than helpful. I began seeing a therapist which helped. Google "depersonalization"...very helpful. Be encouraged.

Claire1996 profile image
Claire1996 in reply to steadfast66

Thank you, I think this is the sort of stuff I need, to be reassured I guess. Sometimes It gets so bad and i have it every single day, not just during 'stressful periods'. I find it hard to talk to people im close to because before the anxiety started I've always been such a strog character, so no-one can ever imagine me crying or being mentally unwell. It does go when I get involved in something or keep busy, which is the only thing which makes me think I do cause it myself by overthinking myself thinking. All I know is I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy.

steadfast66 profile image
steadfast66 in reply to Claire1996

Me either. It's a most challenging way to live. Though not impossible to enjoy life.

Devinlane profile image
Devinlane

You will be fine. I really believe that it is some chemical imbalance or maybe some brain nerve issue. Not really sure but I wish there was some type of medication to cause you not to worry so much. I really hope that you learn how to control it. Just tell yourself its all in your head. And if it gets too bad maybe you should look into taking something.

K1545 profile image
K1545

I know exactly how you feel. I wish I could get a therapist who knows what anxiety feels like

TheHomeLessManIV profile image
TheHomeLessManIV

I can relate to the feeling of being trapped inside my own head, honestly the best thing that will help is cannabis, it's a natural anti anxiety medicaton, and it will help you speak your mind more, it's 100% safe, 0 deaths in the entirety of history have been caused by it or its components, it's impossible to overdose on, it will help you be happy and free your mind, you don't have to smoke it, it's can be ingested many different ways, you can eat it, vape it, drink it, there are tintures and topicals, pills, and there are 1000s of different types, so you can get the effect you are looking for,

I promise man, it'll help

ColeMiller profile image
ColeMiller in reply to TheHomeLessManIV

Weed is what started this for me

ColeMiller profile image
ColeMiller

Hey man, I know exactly what your going through, I know weed is the issue to begin with but look into getting some cbd. Thc is what we're trying to avoid. But cbd helps me calm down and feel more at ease.

SunHead profile image
SunHead

So i found this on google 2 years later lol but i figured i should share my relation to this (i may type a lot but it's only to help you relate)...

I never really had anxiety until i took a stimulant ADD med later in middle school-beginning of high school. That stuff gave me panic attacks, but normal ones so to speak.

Fast forward to college i start to experiment with alcohol and weed.. The first time i ever smoked, i smoked wayyyy too much and had a pretty bad panic attack... I later tried it in moderation and for years i absolutely loved it, hung out with friends, went home smoked, made music. Very recently in my life i had one of the worst panic attacks i think could have been possible. I was shaking like crazy, my body was becoming stiffer, every time i would have a thought in my mind that my mind controlled my breathing.. i lost it. I was high, and i had never confronted my mom high before in my life until this very moment at 25. I kept telling her that i needed an ambulance and i was absolutely going to die.. She didn't know what to do, i tried everything to calm myself down but i was completely trapped and controlled by my own thoughts. I do not wish this upon anyone, ever. I did some trial and error by smoking less but it still pops up so i'm going to stop for a while and seek some way out.

If you chose to read this, thank you, i'm really glad i'm not the only one this has happened to. If you see this, do you like art? Drawing, music etc?

I hope you're feeling better and i have a lot to work on myself!

Joco99 profile image
Joco99

Yes I can relate. Like someone else said, I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy. But like someone else said here, were not going crazy but for the mean time it's just the hardest thing

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