I found out that I have a 1.5 cm piuitary gland mass, and which is relieved to me to find out that something physically is actually wrong with me because I have been having both physical and mental symptoms since Febuary 14 of this year.Before I found out I had a mass I wasalways paranoid if there is actually wrong with, which my psychiatrist sayid"there is nothing wrong " and said sarcastically when I told her I got reffered to do a MRI "what do you think they're going to find, a tumor haha".
We always talked about Depersonalization. And derealization which she said "but you arent schizophrenic" and I told her but cant you still get it from anxiety which she said yes.Then we talked off topic but I brought up Depersonalization because I was having symptomd and she said "oh its part of anxiety" which she confused me.
And it scares me because I dont know if I have it or not because I feel like I am going crazy.Everything just looks weird to me.I feel like my brain is sleep mode still, I feel like I am dreaming,everything looks not familiar to me but then again it does, my family, my room.I feel like Im in my imagination or I am dead.My eyesight seems off but then again it doesnt,my eyes feel tired.I feel like I am high.I dont know how to explainI black out for seconds sometimes,Sometimes I get confused,sometimes I get a moment where I dont who I am or where I am at. .When I look at my hands or in the mirror, I feel like thats nog me.I feel like a zombie.I zone out alot, and when I am doing something I feel like Im not really doing it, I feel detatched from myself. It gets worse if I am in bad lighting.And it scares me because I am always think "What if its not derealization/ Depersonalization,what if it doesnt go awaywhat if I am just going crazy and nothing is real"
I talked to my neruologist and he said derealization/Depersonalization can be a symptom to pituitary gland mass but told me to talk to my psychiatrist, but my psychiatrist is no help.I feel like if I get surgery to take the mass out to get medication to shrink, those symptoms I am feeling wont go away.
If you any of you can help me out, that would be great, if have any questions,I will be happy to answer them,Thank you.