I fought against the anxiety and panic for so long; I wouldn't recognise that I was ill; I felt frustrated and out of control, all the advice I was given couldn't help because I couldn't hear it for the internal conflict inside my own head.
I've been taking Citalopram now for nearly a month, and I don't know if it's the medication or my own body gradually healing itself, but I do feel so much better. All the frustration is still there, the causes of the anxiety still exist, but somehow I can manage it. This definitely feels like a journey - hopefully a journey to recovery, but now I am looking at each of the stations along the way, rather than waiting for the final destination. Some of these stops have been very unpleasant, but more and more they are getting nicer. Sorry if this sounds cryptic; I am trying to teach myself to avoid dwelling on the causes of my depression, and to move forward. That's the hard part, and today I am achieving this and I wanted to share my positivity with others.
I hope you are all doing well, remember the sun may not be shining on you today, but it's there behind the clouds, waiting for the right conditions to come out and shine down and brighten up your day.