Could this be something? I'm really worried that it might be.

[RosaQuinten]

I am wondering if I have some kind of condition, I'm in general a very nervous person, though sometimes I try passing it off as hormones (I'm 17). In social situations I can clam up (happens a lot), and feel like I have nothing to say, and if I do think about something to say, I feel like it is the wrong thing, and I end up not saying a thing. It is strange because I can sometimes feel very social, but only in situations where I do not know the person involved. Like at bus stops, I have started a fair few of nice little conversations. This can also happen in the beginning of friendly relationships. I like to try and make the person comfortable and I enjoy myself, it is like I take comfort in their being a little awkward. I also love the control. The second or third time I meet them however, I clam right up. The more I know someone, the less I trust them. Is this normal?

I also seem to tense my stomach and erm.. butt, a lot. I have to mentally unclench the muscles. My shoulders are like rock they're so tense.

I have been avoiding social situations a lot over the past year, I only see select friends who I feel comfortable with. I no longer see those friends that I had in school, even though we used to be very close. If I do see them, I don't trust them to be honest with me, for they act differently to how they were in school, and it seems like they are not genuine. I know that people change, but I don't believe that they did. If they are putting up a facade, why should I feel safe being myself?

Also I have found that in stressy situations (like in confrontational situations) I can start to feel physically sick, and my spine can start shaking. I tend to over think things, I live in my head. I have such a fear of doing something that could be construed as stupid. I expect myself to be perfect. I fear what might happen if I am not. I see that I can't be perfect, but I get so anxious when I see something that I do wrong, or differently. Thank you for reading this long thing! I'm wondering if I am normal, or if I should seek help. I guess that is kind of what I am doing right now!

*added bit, I got a little sidetracked*

I think I was so relieved to try to show what I am, that I left out the main bit, I have got to the point where I can't physically force down food more than twice a day (when I feel like I'm going to faint) and I feel constantly nauseous. Recently my relationship evolved with a certain someone, and I just don't want to be around him because he makes me so nervous, therefore making me feel sick and really not very happy company. I also have trouble breathing properly, I can't relax and just breathe, I can't try to sleep because I feel even more nauseous. I don't know what to do.

[Hidden]

I was always very shy as a child. As an adult I am nervous and anxious. I am 58 years old now and I have had plenty of time to accept it as just the way I am. I manage lead a "normal" life. ie work, have friendships/relationships. I suppose I suffer from it mildly.

There are people who suffer much worst than me ie. having panic attacks, not being able to work etc. There is treatment available if you need it, but I personally wouldn't take medication for it unless it was stopping me from living a "normal" life. No doubt other people on this site who suffer much worst than I do will reply to you soon. Remember that what is normal for one person is not normal for another. We all have to find out what is normal for us. Also remember all of us are different and unique.

X

[RosaQuinten in reply to Hidden]

Thank you for replying to me, I was beginning to think that I should not have done this, it seems like my problems are not so severe if I compare to others. I know there are many people who have it a lot worse than me, but rational thought and heart do not work as one. I have a rather confused view on uniqueness, surely not all 7 billion people can be unique? But then there is the view that "I am me, therefore I must be special". It's all rather confusing. How did you cope with your work/relationships if you don't mind me asking? It seems like an impossible task to me...

[Hidden]

Hello lovely, thanks for sharing this with us!! Perhaps what you are experiencing is side effects to medication. Have you ever been prescribed with anything strong before? Sometimes it leaves lasting side effects. Usually I'd pass this off as anxiety etc but it doesn't sound like that!! If not pls let me know and I will give you some tips on what you can do to alievate the symptoms that you are dealing with. But the number one thing that you must start doing from today is start writing in a diary, start writing how you feel, how your days go, what could have triggered these symptons of tension and nervousness, use that diary as a way of unfolding all mysteries and as a way of creating your dreams and steps towards freedom!! You will feel better if you start doing this 2 or 3 times a day!! Good luck xxx

[Hidden]

Hello again! I want to add that you are a beautiful, special person. I want you to write a list of 20 of your best qualities and achievements I.e. 'I am friendly and warm', 'I have great listening skills'. Also add 20 qualities, dreams, achievements that you would like to have I.e. 'I am completely sociable and confident in all situations and around all types of people', 'I am fearless, bold and courageous', 'I have the job and education of my dreams' etc and for a few weeks confess these qualities/affirmations out loud 2 times a day. In the morning and at night! Sometimes our thoughts of ourselves can affect us or experieneces so when we consistently build ourselves up bad symptoms will start to diminish. This positive affirmations strategy really helped me in my life and my achievements, confidence and happiness has increased so much!! xxxx

[RosaQuinten in reply to Hidden]

Thank you for taking the time to read my problems. I have never been on any medications,though alcohol could be considered as one on some irresponsible nights. I have had the shaking thing a long time, only I have learnt to avoid the situations a little more. I really like the affirmations idea, I have a lot to be thankful for, but when I lose sight of that, I get worse. I will try to do a few each night/morning to try to set the tone for my life. I'm glad that you feel positive about life! It makes me hopeful!