I am currently having CBT one of my tasks prior to my next visit tomorrow was to have a day were I could allow anxious or worrying thoughts to occupy my mind ...that was yesterday...and a day were I don't allow the thoughts and anxieties to come in...today is the none anxious thoughts day...
I thought it best to get out today to give myself a chance...so I've come to a favourite hotel nearby for coffee and brought along my iPad...invariably my frame of mind here is good and that helps....
I am mostly anxious thought free....apart from thinking when am I going to be ready to look for a job, rather than it be an anxious thought I am rationalising with it...I believe it will realistically be at least another couple of months....I've come to terms with that now, after thinking initially I would be out of work a couple of weeks....I have got to thinking about my survival during this non work period and right now as long as my Dr signs me off as I require I will be fine with that but will he?? Not sure how long they will allow me to receive the benefits that are sick pay.......hmmmmm I'm now worrying....and when I worry I need the answers to stop it...
Right I'm going to look around and take in the scenery, the voices in the background of the people having coffee and having meetings, there are not many people here just a few...their conversation takes me away from my thoughts....is this about control???? Controlling of the negative thoughts....
Thinking about having a cigarette now....
Sue