Tomorrow morning was when I was meant to go away to Spain...I pulled out but still paid my half...I'm sitting here in a right state thinking should I just bite the bullet..get on that plane and enjoy 10 days away in the sun. I have the anxiety voice in the back of my mind "saying aaaaahhhh don't go you'll regret it"

I'm totally torn..I hae probably another hour where I could just say F it and pack my things. If the me of last year could see the me of this year she would knock some sense into her.

9 Replies

  • Are you going with people that will look after you Ashley, and do you have any medication.

    Its your call really, only you will know if you can handle it all.

    I guess it wouldn't be too packed in Spain this time of year, and not too hot either.

    wish you well



  • Oh Ashley,

    This is such a rubbish illness. The amount of holidays, trips, special occasions I've missed because I just couldn't get out of the front door.

    Whatever you decide will be ok. The world will not stop turning on the strength of your decision ~ It will be ok.

    Personally though I find I regret more the things I haven't done than the things I have. Do you have sufficient funds to return home early if you had too? Sometimes I can bribe myself with thoughts like that!!!! If not it is ok not to go this year. Spain will still be there when you are feeling stronger and your friends will understand.

    Sorry this isn't more help but please be assured that we are all here for you whatever you decide.

    Best Wishes

  • I'm going with my ex who I'm now back with after we sorted everything out. Some of her friends who I don't really know at all are also going.

    I don't have any medication for anything..I think I'm just scared I panic and make a fool of myself in front of her friends. Plus it's the thought of socialising for the next 10 nights.. Don't think I have it in me. Though I should be grateful I have the opportunity to go away.


  • Lizard, makes a lot of sense there,

    If you do decide to go make sure you have youe health card !

    I'd talk it over with your partner, is she willing to stay with you over the 10 days regardless.

    Wish you well



  • Hi ashley I know excactly how you feel, Im due to go to alcudia in july and i already know im nt going as my anexity just aint gonna let me. Im going to miss out big time as my kids and hubby are going but its my stubborn anexity that wont let me , some people say you will never know if you can or carnt unless you try, maybe go t the airport and see how you feel once there ? I had a recomendation of the over counter tablets kalms they are supposed to do excactly what they say they do calm you can you try these and then go to the airport? if once there you feel good then go if you feel panicked you could always spend time alone with your partner and then time alone to calm .. If when you get to the airport you just know you cannot at least you tried hope this helps xdonver

  • She would stay with me but I guess I just worry I ruin her holiday as well.

    I think I've decided not to go...had a good cry there surprisingly it's made me feel better, it's amazing what a good cry does!

    I did pros and cons and I must have thought about 15 cons so that sort of decided it for me.


  • Aww Ashley I'm so sorry your missing out on the holiday but believe me I understand how you feel. I haven't been away for 3 years now due to this b.... anxiety. This year my hubby went with his family to tenerife. He went in Feb and it was so cold here I walked the dog and cried into the wind the morning he left. Well the holiday is well over now the weather here is not so cold my tears have all dried up no one died or the world didn't stop because I didn't go. So don't beat your-self up over not going now let it pass. Make the most of the time she's gone plan a few treats for your-self that can be anything from sitting all day in your pj's to sky diving. Just enjoy what ever you do.

  • Yeah I didn't I've been sitting breaking my heart all morning. I mean I feel physically fine I think in the end I just worried I would get over there and have a panic attack and be so far away from home...I'm more mad at myself for letting it win.

    But your right...she will be back next Saturday and by the following week will have forgot all about it. My mums been great shes been trying to think of little things we can do for the next 10 days to pass the time. So I suppose it's not all bad. X

  • No hun it's not try and enjoy the time with your mum she sounds great.

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