Anxious and deppresed

[Ramoona]

I just feel super down, my holiday is over.. My job is something I don't like, or to be exact hate, and I'm tired of myself and everything, I'm a medical Studnet /intern and I just don't like it.and can't do anything cause I only got three semester left, but being away from home and not having a support group is just crushing me.

[Randone101]

it’s good you came here then! There are plenty of people to talk to, are there any local support groups you can join in person?

[Ramoona in reply to Randone101]

How to find people to talk to here...And not exactly, I don't think they could understand.. And with social anxiety I'm kinda not comfortable

[Randone101 in reply to Ramoona]

Starting a post like you did is a good way! More people will start chiming in and those who have the ability to talk directly can start chats directly.

As far as the second part you said, trust me, they will understand, you’re one of hundreds of millions of humans on earth dealing with anxiety. You’re not alone, the exact problems you’re going through are being gone through by many many others. This is your first step to feeling better!

[Ramoona in reply to Randone101]

Thanks for the support.🙏🏻. So I should just wait it out then

[Randone101 in reply to Ramoona]

I think if you need direct support, ask for assistance from your school, pleeeenty of students will be dealing with what you’re experiencing, they just don’t talk about it because there is this false stigma around anxiety.

[Ramoona in reply to Randone101]

I don't think it's kinda alright.. I don't have much time to be in school being an intern.. And my school doesn't have an assistent system.. Like. I don't think it's active

[Randone101 in reply to Ramoona]

I see you mentioned you tried therapy and it didn’t work, I’ve had therapists I liked more than others. Look at it this way, a good therapist will give you tools to help manage your anxiety. I always hear that CBT is the gold standard for therapy involving anxiety, so you could try to look for one that specializes in it.

[Ramoona in reply to Randone101]

Yeah, well, for some reason I couldn't find a therapist I could click with and it's just getting more expensive

[Moongazer9 in reply to Ramoona]

Since covid so much therapy.is only offered remotely! .....it's hard to find an affordable one that you can meet with face to face! . ..I think that alot of the mental health system is fractured......I was with a psychiatrist who went from meeting in person to offering only teleappointments where all he has to do is to flip on a switch, swipe my credit card.....things actually are getting worse. He doesn't take insurance and for awhile I thought that it was worth it to meet with him in person until he went remote and stayed that way until after covid! Seems like a cop out to say the least, and I keep looking for another psychiatrist or psychiatric nurse practitioner! I'know of someone who was actually a good psychologist and would meet face to face with me.....I got out of network benefits and then my insurance changed. The psychologist I'm with now lives only a few towns over from me, but we Never meet in person......he sends me texts by phone for our therapy sessions to br held by videoconfercing .....I actually feel that I am getting worse!

Either there are technological glitches......and i really feel that he exists for me only in cyberspace!.......I'm getting to feel really taken advantage of as he bills my insurance .........the insurance documents say oue hour of psychoanalysis. .and i meet with him online for.30 to 45 minutes......I confronted him about this and he told me that the rest of the time he spends writing notes on my case. I let this go when we first discussed it.....but it really does seem like sleight of hand.......I'm looking for a new therapist even if I have to pay as I'm getting absolutely no where with this!

I used to work in the medical field and spent hours dictating notes for charts......I wasn't charging patients for that as it was expected!

I'd be interested in knowing your thoughts about what I wrote given than that we both work or have worked in the medical field and suffer from anxiety.

I.think that mental.health therapy is taken advantage of by many practionerz!

When my present therapist comes on the screen from his home he actually has the background blurred out!

I.am absolutely disgusted!!!

[Ramoona in reply to Moongazer9]

Tbh I'm in a place where I couldn't read all ur post.. And I'm super sorry and sorryI know u r going through a hard time and send a virtual hug for u

[LoveforAll41]

Howdy Ramoona, and welcome! I am sorry that you are suffering and feel stuck. Do you think you will be able to choose a specialty or find a job that you will like when you are done with school? I think better to change now than later when you are supporting a family or something and can't change jobs. Does your school have counselors you could reach out to? I recently found out after a lot of therapy that my job was really really bringing me down and finally got another one. My current job reached out and I got a different position with SO MUCH less stress that fits way better. Too bad I suffered for three years...

I wish you peace. University is when my mental health first got real bad. I wish I had really dived into getting help.☮️

[Ramoona in reply to LoveforAll41]

Thanks for replying. I really appreciate it Unfortunately it's a live or die situation.. I can't change anything job related now.. And just have a year an a half left of my studies, though I hate hospitals and clinical medicine and have social anxiety in some ways, my uni's city is super closed and I don't have much of a real friend.. Though my school does offer counseling they are just not.. It.. I tried therapy for a year but.. Things didn't work out

[LoveforAll41]

Argh, I am sorry you are stuck. Do you think you'll like the job better after school? It won't be the same one will it?

I guess you make the best of what you have. There are so many therapists, perhaps a different one? I have loved the book "Feeling Great" by Dr David Burns. There are also podcasts on youtube you can find by searching "feeling great podcast".

[Ramoona in reply to LoveforAll41]

Thanks for the recommendations

[CatPrimus]

Thanks for posting this, I do not want to say anything cliche to make your situation worse but I am also in the position of not liking or hating school I am just exhausted of evreything in general such as waking up and home life. I truly belive you can get through the rest of your semester. I hope this support group benifits you, a online support group could be better than nothing. I hope this helps. People are supportive on here.

[MaggieSylvie]

It just sounds as if you have no joy in your life. You sensibly said that you have to finish your next three semesters, and when you have done that, at least you will have a sense of achievement. Until then, I would suggest you add something into your life that brings you joy. Could you do something you have enjoyed in the past, or something you have always wanted to try? Universities usually have clubs - music societies, climbing clubs, art ... Taking part in something besides studying that really appeals to you would help you in so many ways. Remember, also, that while you are not enjoying your present job, that doesn't mean you won't enjoy working somewhere else. If it's really the area you are studying, then you can always change to an area of medicine that interests you more. What was it that lead you into studying medicine? It's turned out to be not what you were expecting, but perhaps you are not there yet. Keep studying hard, and never stop asking questions.

[hum77]

Hi Ramona, I hate my job too. Life is really tough for me as I had to live without emotional support. I used to cry to bed and wake up and go to work for 10 years. My husband was abusive. He went to jail for it but I am still with him. He cannot abuse anymore because he knows the consequences. Please try to enjoy small moments in life. Observe the nature around you. You can do it. You are not alone.

[Moongazer9 in reply to hum77]

I find that anxiety and depression are cyclical.

I remember being in medical school.decades ago having studied hard for a career that I thought I'd enjoy only to find out the opposite

Even a patient i saw at one of those HMOs that I helped tried to sue me along with 12 other doctors that saw him before and misdiagnosed him!

I actually had to change lawyers to get my name dropped from the case!!!