What does a frog do if his car breaks down? – He has it toad!
Or
Why do cows never have any money? Because the farmers milk them dry!
Or
What do you get when you cross a centipede with a parrot? A walkie-talkie!
Or
What kind of math do birds like? A: Owlgebra!
Or
Why didn’t the pachyderm get the job he wanted? A: His qualifications were completely irrelephant!
Or
Who plays a whale's favourite music? Orca-stras!
Or
What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a jelly? The collie wobbles!
My daughter has fallen out with her boyfriend after seeing him packing washing powder on to shelves in Tesco's
.
She said: You told me you were a stunt pilot?
He says: No. I said I was part of the Ariel display team!
Onya and Karl married way back in Imperial Russia. Karl went on to become a well known political theorist, whilst Onya is credited with inventing the starting pistol.
Just got back from hospital. They reckon i might have
Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis.
But at the moment it's hard to say!
I'm hoping to start a business making money from used chewing gum.
But I need some help getting it off the ground!
Just had a call from a solicitor. My late uncle has left me some property. I now have to find out where Sod Hall is.
Thank you. Had good laugh 😆 and yeah day brightened up 👍
Brilliant Bazzak 🤣🤣
Jokes
