I am reaching out to ask for support and insight into finding some color in my black surrounding funk. . Anhedonia means lack of joy . My son died 2 years ago and a part of me died then too. He died on a friday at work from a heart attack and when Fridays come around my world gets darker. I know there is no time limit on grieving and mourning,
I need to exercise for health and just get lost in self pity. Can anyone relate and wish to offer support and help.
This is my first post on the site and am praying for compassion.....
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Laphi24
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Hello Laphi24, i quite understand the dark days after losing your son, it must be heart rending for you. But like you i should exercise but i dont, i absolutely hate it, but i do keep busy working outside and oddly once i get started on the garden i do get a certain relief and i can get occupied ,it helps to clear my mind. You are correct there is no time limit on grieving it can take over every hour of the day as i know so well, i lost my beloved partner almost 5 years ago but the pain of loss never goes away. I get good days and bad days but i persevere and try to get through, its all we can do.
I am very sorry. There is no way to compensate for your loss and it is a terrible one. The only thing I can suggest is to exercise as much as you can, and to see a psychiatrist on an ongoing basis to talk about your feelings. I have lost a husband, but I think your loss is even worse. You certainly do have all of my compassion. It is good that you have come to this site. b1
That's heartbreaking, I cannot imagine. You are very strong. I can only relate to grief of loss of my family, lastly a brother to suicide. Also I have few other types of grief, have cried a river of tears. Sometimes just has to come out! I try to imagine or believe there's a better way, somehow, I don't know. Hope you can get back to exercise, god knows I need to. I do hope you, one day will find peace but it is usually a gradual process, not to rush. It's pretty rough at times, I know.
Welcome Laphi24, condolences on such a great loss, heart-breaking. Are there any bereavement groups in your area? In the UK, we have Cruse, it's to help the bereaved. You can phone and let all your emotions out whilst talking to a trained counsellor. There are also groups where you can meet, listen, talk and be heard by people who have also suffered such a loss.And of course, there's this forum where you'll always be treated with compassion.
I am so very sorry for your loss. I hope you are contending the best you can. It takes time to grieve such a loss. But I understand that you need to do things that are good for you also. I agree with the above commentor who suggested a bereavement group, and perhaps possibly a therapist to speak with or a grief counselor. I am wishing you all the compassion in the world, as losing a son is never easy. My heart goes out to you. May you find peace and solace in these trying times.
Also, perhaps joining or participating in a group for exercise could be beneficial or helpful for you so you don’t have to do it alone.
I'm so sorry to hear of your loss and continuing grief. There is just no simple answer to living with grief and loss....I struggle with it, too, and don't feel joy. The only thing I know to do is keep moving forward as best you can. I know hospice in my area offers bereavement support groups. I'm currently in an IOP (intensive outpatient program) for anxiety and depression, and it helps me to be with others who are experiencing the same kinds of feelings. I go to the YMCA and take water exercise classes, as well as yoga and stretch classes. I also volunteer. Again, it helps to be with other people and to keep busy. As you can see on this site, you are not alone. When I'm out in public, I often wonder how many of the people I pass by are suffering, too. We can't take away your pain, but we can offer our hand in compassion and understanding.
Yes, just do five minutes of exercise and if you feel like it another 5 minutes.
This is time to think about mental health and just take time for yourself
There is no rush or pressure till you recover from this immensely heart breaking news
Do keep talking to other people, and the happiness you shared whilst reflecting on the hard times too. Just use us whenever you feel like it. You have to let yourself understand what it means, all life and yourself. Each one is important, keeping memories fresh can help and help you come to terms with it all. Share, your memories with friends and family and us. Through that you will still feel connected to him. Best to you x
I am beyond sorry about the loss of your son. That sounds incredibly hard, can't even imagine. This is a very supportive group and I hope you find some peace here.
Your grief is valid and understandably all encompassing. Start small, give yourself grace, maybe start with small walks, or gentle chair yoga.
I belong to a non-profit called Robin’s Hope (robinshope.org). There we learn resilience skills for our trauma, through coping skills, art, music, yoga (coming soon), plus many others. Starting in September a new group called Grief Journey will be offered on Mondays at 2:00pm virtually. You might find it helpful.
Robin’s Hope is online 7 days a week with various groups (see calendar on-line) and 3 days a week in person in the Richmond Va area.
I am sending you positive energy and warm hugs, you deserve it.
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