last vent

(Edited)

Hello, these past 6 months I’ve been venting and complaining about my situations. Many people have give advices and helped me through my issues. I want to thank everyone for helping me and giving me advices.

Thing still didn’t changed, but there’s nothing me nor anyone can do about it. I never had connections with anyone like friendship, relationship, or just general support since the beginning of my life. No community in the entire existence don’t want to associate with me. However, I think I’ve changed, I’m not sure for the better or for the worse. I know that I’m still a mess of a person, a coward, uninteresting, plain terrible, and I still don’t know who I am or what I am. I give up on improving my mental health or just improving in general. All types of mental health professionals have no idea what’s wrong me. It’s not their fault, I’m just a mess. I wish someone could’ve told me that I have no worthy or get to be happy in life when I younger. Everyday, I felt the urge to self destruct. I think it’s better to rot and miserable til I get old and gone because I know that everyone wants me to stay