If you could stop your parents from meeting/ delete yourself would you?

[Against_the_current]

Me. I can't. I'm holding by a thread. Ik this isn't the place for this but i can't stop crying and thinking about deleting myself. Life is miserable. There's no hope. Ironically my name is hope. Mom might lose her job. I struggle to find a job. She drinks, is mentally ill and every night this woman breaks my heart. I tried living alone but im all alone in a tiny, moldy room, haunted by all mom's problems. Others go to weddings, have rich partners, party, have heritage, have happy parents. I'm mentally and physically wreck, mom is alone, might lose her job, her heritage is minus a lot of money, she's struggling and drinking. I'm popping pills but i still can't stop crying. Someone offered me a lot of money for some humiliation and i had to agree and I didn't see a cent. Then mom started yapping about how her coworker's studying master's and how the university in my city now teaches pharmacy so she might lose her job. I feel so useless. This world is cruel. I seeked help but it only got worse. Damn Bulgarian mentality of "get your sh*t toghether" . Would you get your sh*t toghether if your mother is in deep depression every night, telling you how miserable our life is and drinking till she abuses you and little sis. I don't think i will find someone or a job or a house. I just want to d13

[AnxiousSilver]

"I'm popping pills but i still can't stop crying."

Please be careful with the pills.

I wish I had the answers, but I don't.

.

Please.. Call or go to the hospital if you are taking more pills than what you are supposed to be taking.

Keep posting if you need to, we're listening and trying our best to help.

[CLB1125]

please don’t think that is the answer. There is help out there it’s just a matter of finding it. Don’t give up. We’re here for you.

[cashew78]

We can't tell each other what to do, but I hear you. I struggle with my own parents, their issues, their immaturity, their need to project upon me. Can you keep your life separate and prevent it from being so entangled with your mother? Some space may lend new perspective.

[SoporRose]

I *would* try to get my act together. I have been doing that work. It's difficult, and it's ongoing effort, but the alternative is so much worse. Please keep fighting.

[Zhangliqun]

God created you not by accident. The difficulties you are going through have a holy purpose, probably many holy purposes that are incomprehensible to us -- but one that is almost certain is so later on you can mentor others going through similar situations. There are likely others in your future who will die by their own hand if you are not there to help them through it.

You say this world is "cruel" and in a nutshell, it is. This means all these other folks who appear to you to have great lives also have their own personal demons and torments that you don't know about.

It also means this world is not supposed to be Heaven, it is boot camp and combat at the same time. Only after all the training and fighting is done do we get to stand down and go to our eternal home.

All of this is times ten or a hundred for those of us with mood and other mental disorders, but the reward in the end will also be that much greater. But not if you desert your unit. In the meantime, you are needed in this fight -- don't leave your buddies behind!

[Nothing_but_books]

It's important to preserve privacy on the internet. I think you may have revealed your name in your post. If that's the case, please edit your post to be safe.

[Starrlight]

❤️💜❤️