What am I going to do with the rest of my life...

[MrsSippySlim]

Lately I've been wondering what I'm going to do going forward. I'm not sure if it's the meds, my illness (schizoaffective,PTSD,anxiety, depression) or a combination of both, but I struggle with my memory, retention,and comprehension. It causes more social anxiety because my brain is so blank I have nothing to talk about in a conversation. I feel like a blank canvas most of the time. I use to be a gifted musician and I was good at drawing. I went to school for medical assisting and I got to CNA certifications and now I can't do any of that stuff because I can't remember anything. It's as if I didn't accomplish anything in my life. I tried applying for a job with a temp agency and I felt so stupid because I couldn't follow along with what she was saying. I kept asking her to repeat herself and I asked the same questions over and over. Im on SSI and spend most of my time in bed. The tv plays in the background just so I won't be in silence but I can absorb was playing on the screen. I barely have friends and I dread interacting with family because again I have nothing to say like I have no brain activity. I can't go on like this. What quality of life will I have😭

[MrsSippySlim]

I meant to say I can't absorb what's playing on the tv

[sunshinefan]

I, too have memory issues from getting ECT. I also had to resign from my job due to my depression and health issues. I try to find hobbies to do like coloring. It helps me pass the time and I don't really need to remember anything. I also try to get outside if it is nice out to walk a little.