So, I have made some progress with my life. It's been about a year since I graduated college, and I haven't had so much as an interview up until a bit ago. I moved from my mom's place to my dad's, where there are a few more of my friends around and more opportunity. I got an interview for a part time job and got an offer (and accepted it). It is pretty much a job for students which makes me feel somewhat bad. It is something relating to IT, which isn't really something I think I'll want to do for a long time.. Also because it is part time (not well paid, not a lot of hours) I am still with my Dad unable to get a place on my own. That being said, it is employment and I have it.
My therapist clapped for me and tried to remind me about how I was when I started. I can recognize logically that I have made progress, but I don't "feel" it. I feel somewhat similarly to how I was a month ago. Just lost and sad and crying a lot. I would like to be kinder to myself, but even hearing that I "deserve" it just doesn't convince my subconcious. Everything I have done doesn't feel like it is enough. I feel that I need to be doing even more; working more hours, getting a full time position, getting more friends, getting a relationship. I just wish I was able to bask in the progress I have made. But instead I just see the road ahead and feel discouraged.
Does anyone else have experiences like this? Has anyone here made that feeling lessen over time? If so, how? I am open to advice.
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WaterMyMind
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tbh I feel like it’s less about what I want to do and more about what I can do. I’m very aware of the reality that I’ll have to provide for myself, and it’s not likely I’ll get a partner to share finances with. It doesn’t really feel like I get to “explore” because living with parents is not good for mental health. Thank you though!!!
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