the way I feel

[darkthoughts504]

It's ok to put yourself first and it's ok to get rid of those who are damaging your mind, etc. I don't owe them anything I did my part and if I need to be judged, God is the only one who can. No regrets

[Turnipgirl]

Ever since I moved back at the end of May last year I have let lots of things go for my own well being and sanity.

An exercise I do is I gather up all the things I want to be rid of and then throw them away in the fire and watch them burn and let them go.

Things I have let go of since then are:

1. Anger and resentment over getting evicted at the end of May and now I feel that was the best thing that could have happened to me now time has moved on!

2. A scabby pub near the old place that let us down on new year's day 2023 when they supposedly hadn't ordered in any food when we were looking forward to a new years day lunch knowing it was the last in that flat and we had our drinks we had paid for and had thrown down the cutlery in anger and walked out and cried and had gone to the chippy who couldn't have done enough for us and I am happy to return to that chippy in the future when I'm in the area again and it's lunch time!

3. Morning movie sessions have been replaced by an extra walk.

4. Not giving others the power to control what I do or don't do when they aren't physically present!

5. Anger and resentment towards those who have pulled the rug from under me claiming there's things available and no there isn't and slamming the door in my face at the last minute I have let go of for my own sanity taking it as a lesson not to expect to get anything in future and that nothing is guaranteed to anyone.

Say when the promises to come to something I am delighted!

It's the appalling way some of those things were done say like that shambles of a pharmacy job where they claimed loads of things were available there and one minute I had a job and was excited about the future and next minute no I hadn't got a job and it was all snatched away from me!

Thing is with them don't lie deliberately and play with people's lives!

Say at the pharmacy they were struggling financially and had to let staff go I could have understood that as financial problems can hit anyone at any time!

No it's the deliberate and malicious way that was done that upset me rather than losing the position in itself!

[fauxartist]

I'd talk to a lawyer, social services, who ever will listen to get the best course of action. Take your power back by doing that. Give him a formal eviction notice, and a notice to vacate. Figure out how to change the locks, and the minute he's out the door, change them. Try and have someone stay with you while the transition is happening, and notify authorities if there is any hassle from him. Box up his stuff and leave it on the front porch.... and no.... you owe no one an explanation....your taking your life back.

[darkthoughts504 in reply to fauxartist]

I placed a note for him in my kitchen yesterday. I told him he need to be gone by the end of feb when it warms up outside and i was being nice when i gave him that date. He left this morning, oh well. I am tired of the foolishness and no help with the bills, etc. I was tolerating a whole lot from him and my others kids did not like that. They been telling me to toss him out

[mizzou7016]

not only is it okay to put yourself at the top of your priority list..it is necessary....learned this lesson the hard way.....i've always worried about what other people think of me....it's a matter of realizing that no matter what I do.....someone will have an opinion of me....Just be true to yourself....that's all that matters....as for being judged......we are always going to be judged....again it doesn't matter what they think....as long as your integrity is intact....and also I am my own worst critic....

[fauxartist]

I'd still change the locks.

[darkthoughts504 in reply to fauxartist]

i have the key he had

[Midori]

I totally agree!

Cheers, Midori