Overwhelmed. Again did stupid things of anxiety

[Against_the_current]

I woke up late, had no time to chill after i woke, had to go to therapy, was late, my therapist said mom's actually the reason i'm so anxious, insecure and jelaous (i lost someone important because of that) and less responsible than dad. I paniced, called mom to see she s normal and everything is okay. But sis picked up the phone and said mom's busy. I paniced, i thought she's drinking or something, maybe she was cooking or something responsible. I asked sis if mom's taking good care of her and mom heard. And i'm worried she was offened and might blackmail and treaten sis to give her to dad's. It was terrible last time. Mom was "i bought her a nintendo, i'm serving her at bed, i'm not having other man". And my therapist told me to not ask sis If everything is okay but i still did it. Aghhhhjggj, freaking anxiety,making me cause problems. I texted mom but i think she's asleep

Edit 2:I paniced and annoyed dad asking If they're okay and has mom called him

[Against_the_current]

Thanks. So dad won't be mad at me and stop giving me money, right?

[Against_the_current]

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh

[EndUser13]

Gotta agree with PurpleBones here, it's easy to focus on problems rather than solutions and get bogged down, but the opposite is SO much healthier.

I say this knowing what it's like to love toxic family members.

[Against_the_current in reply to EndUser13]

I'm scared to death. But i gotta try

[SoporRose]

Maybe you could talk to your therapist about ways to stay in contact with your sister that won't unsettle your mother. Your therapist might be able to give you some phrases to use that will let your sister know you care about her welfare but that don't sound like you're criticizing your mother.

[Against_the_current in reply to SoporRose]

But next session is on 30rd 😖