Bipolar 2?

[Emmabobemma]

Today i got up at eight and have barely left my sewing project at the couch all day for about 14 hours. I made five fully clothed felt dolls, made myself drinks and dinner, and experienced about 0 depression or anxiety symptoms. Yesterday i hardly had the motivation to move, and for the past couple weeks I’ve been having emotional meltdowns nearly every day to the point where i couldn’t make it through the DBT classes they sent me to after they discharged me from the psych ward.

I’ve been diagnosed with severe major depression and generalized anxiety, PTSD, and borderline personality disorder. everyone in my life including me thinks borderline is a sore misdiagnosis. I’ve been on antidepressants for almost a year now and i feel like nothing has gotten better except for brief, seemingly random episodes of productivity. Neurodivergence has been a past suggestion, although, i feel, an ill-fitting one.

I’ve been practically begging my medical team for a diagnosis i resonate with, really any idea of how to approach my ever-worsening symptoms. My dad suggested i screen for bipolar 2 today and after doing research, i feel hopeful… borderline never made as much sense as BP2 seems to, and there seems to be much more to it than major depression because my body does not respond to antidepressants for long.

I’ve messaged my therapist about screening for bipolar 2. If this is the right diagnosis, I’ll finally know the reason why nothing has worked up until this point. I hope to god it is because it’s the first real solid ray of hope I’ve had in a long time. I’m trying not to get my hopes up too much so as not to sway the results, but I’ve just been in so much pain for not knowing for so long now.

[Lizzo30]

Have you noticed if your mood relates to your menstrual cycle hormones can play a big part in mental health

[Emmabobemma in reply to Lizzo30]

That's not something I've noticed -- as in depression doesn't seem to occur especially or exclusively around my period -- although hormones tend to make it a little more severe. That's a good suggestion.

[Lizzo30 in reply to Emmabobemma]

Bipolar 1 or 2 involves mania type 2 mania is not as intense as type 1 Mania manifests as needing less sleep , talking more , a sense of confidence spending more money than usual also usually an underlying thread of agitation - mania can last a few days or a few months after mania comes a crash and depression

[32Punch]

Hi - In my experience, mental health diagnoses can be different from different drs. They are subjective. My Mother was diagnosed with major depression at 20 and it was not until she was 65 (!) when she was finally diagnosed with Bipolar 2 and went on lithium. That said, I would think it could be helpful to your drs to keep some kind of diary about your moods, activities, etc. on a daily basis for the dr. to review for clues to your possible diagnosis. Drs see you for such limited time, it must be difficult for them to suss out what's going on with their patients over time, the days, weeks, months of life. Good luck to you!

[Emmabobemma in reply to 32Punch]

Thank you for your advice and support. The one who diagnosed me as borderline was a nurse practitioner at my latest hospital stay. I've contacted my therapist so hopefully she can refer me to get screened and maybe try bipolar medication. It's scary because what if I'm wrong and it has adverse effects? But I'm desperate so I'll try just about anything I can get medically advised. I do keep a diary and have for a long time. Or, I take down my thoughts intermittently on my notes app. It would probably be a lot more helpful if I catalogued things daily instead of just when something notable happens.

[Emmabobemma]

Update: I've been diagnosed with ADHD and bipolar 2. I've been on Lamicdal for a few months now, completed Dialectical Behavioral Training, and seem to be slowly but steadily stabilizing. These two diagnoses are the most well-fitting ones I've recieved in my year of treatment, and the addition of a mood stabilizer to my medication seems to be helping. I have more hope for recovery than I have in a long time.