Anxiety, depression, bipolar

[Bee1232]

Hi all, I have been suffering anxiety and depression my whole life. Bi polar doc says depression the next doc.... they have no clue. All I know is I’m majorly depressed and I’m a dark place can anybody relate. Meds don’t seem to work anymore.

[StayPositive333]

Bee, what meds are you taking if you dont mind sharing. I ask only because i was prescribed some that turned on me. I had the same undiagnosis issues with 2 Drs.. manic most likely and now depressed. Have you been able or are you eating healthy? I know staying away rom sugar, carbs + processed foods are best but its the only thing that brings me comfort. I need to snap out of it.. trying... hopefully tomorrow is a new beginning

[Bee1232 in reply to StayPositive333]

Well I was on Paxil for 10 years and it pooped out then I was on Felecia for 10 years that pooped out the Zoloft a few months ago that one only took 2 months to poop out my last dr gave me lamictal and told me I shouldnt be on antidepressants because they poop out I should be on a mood stabelizer. The limit all made my depression 75 times worse I have no idea how that’s possible but it helped with anxiety and definitely clarity and thinking but with deep depression. So now I’m trying Lithium. The reviews are good but I have no idea what else to do I need to work and it’s soooooo hard I feel like I walk around all day at work faking it! Don’t know how to explain it.

[Bee1232 in reply to Bee1232]

That is suppose to say Celexa

[StayPositive333 in reply to Bee1232]

Ugh, meds... I was on Klonopin a benzodiazepine for 6 yrs "as prescribed". It turned on me as well not shocking as I found later they're not to be taken for more then 2-3 weeks. Fast fwd, a 1 yr taper been off 2 1/2 Yes and the symptoms after off were horendous as my Gaba neurotransmitters and central nervous system had to learn how to correct. Glad to be off but left with the depression and learning how to control my anxiety med free.

Ad's can be the same as you know which is why they're switching them up on you.

I'm not a fan of any Psyc drugs now but did some reading on the Lithium. Seems more natural. Hope that works for you.

Familiar with the "faking it" part as once off I could barely do anything. Became a shell of who I was before. Hugs to you... working through this all is defiantly rough, real rough.

Feel like a guinea pig being prescribed other meds. I tried the lamical but found it could also have lasting affects so chose to be just me and hopefully my inner wiring continues to adjust.

Deep breaths, stay inner strong and crossing my fingers on the Lithium..

Just vent when needed... we listen + understand

[Sunnidayz1]

Seek a new doctor. Nothing wrong with that. Keep trying. It's worth the work & energy.

[lovetodance2018]

Hi Bee1232, I am so glad you reached out here. I can relate what you are going through. I struggled with depression and anxiety for over 20 + years. They also at times told me I showed signs of bipolar. My episodes went like this, I would be going along my normal life then I would feel anxiety coming on, if I didn't catch it in time, I would quickly drop into a deep dark depressed state where I couldn't function, get out of bed, or anything. Normal tasks seemed overwhelming. The psychiatrist would then raise the dosage of my medication and in time I would feel better. However, then they thought I was at a manic stage because when I did feel better, I felt like wonder woman and was running on overdrive.

After working on a self-awareness journey with my life coach, I am realizing my depression is majorly due to my thoughts and my beliefs. I spend some much time putting myself down, not saying encouraging things to myself, being too hard on myself, not believing in myself, that I am defeating myself. We began looking a why I think the way I do, why I have negative feelings about myself, and how can I move forward.

Things that were said about me I took into my heart and didn't let go of. Most of the time they weren't true, but it is what I listened to. I had to work on changing my thoughts. A method called EFT (Emotional Freedom Tapping ) really helped me. It incorporates saying positive things about myself along with tapping acupressure points. The two activities together help you change your thoughts and beliefs about yourself. Here is a link to the method: bit.ly/2YJpJEi

Medication by itself doesn't heal us, it takes working with a counselor or life coach to learn what is holding us back from letting go of the behaviors that cause us the depression and anxiety. Also we gain tools to help us move forward. It is possible to make the changes to feel better. I will be praying for you. Faith is huge with healing too. I am available to chat anytime you'd like. God bless!

[Bee1232]

Hi lovetodance. Yes I really get the power of positive thoughts but gosh I’m in this dark hole and I cant get out I’m so scared I’m on my 5th day I think of lithium... omg today I told my boss to F off 2 minutes later I was like euphoria I was so happy but depressed then I came home and all I did was yell at my dog I couldn’t stop yelling I yelled so hard my heart and head were beating together in pain. I don’t even get like that when I’m not on anything. It’s scary I just wonder if it’s maybe because I’m on my way up and it will go away or I should stop it. Without any meds I can’t get off the bed or couch. It’s really difficult to go to work like this I really just want to give up it seems hopeless it really really does☹️ I’m starting to see a counsler next week I already did my first intake app. I need to be able to deal with life for some reason I can’t. Don’t know why. Tired..... wish I had people like me that lived around me so I could go to group therapy. I don’t think ANYBODY in the world has what I have☹️

[lovetodance2018 in reply to Bee1232]

I am glad you are starting therapy. I struggled for almost 20 years until I learned that the depression doesn't have to run my life, that I do have control over it. First you are right, it is important to feel like the chemicals are coming into balance with the medication. Then really do try that EFT (Emotional Freedom Tapping) it really works. Also, I have learned to do deep conscious breaths. I used to think yeah breathing doesn't really make a difference, but it does when you make the conscious effort to do it. I take a deep breath in through my nose to the count of five and breath in all the good things I want in my life. Hold it for the count of five and let it out for the count of seven and as I am letting out that breath through my mouth I am also letting anything that is negative and weighing me down. I do this for about 2 minutes which is repeating this breathing sequence 10 times. It truly helps. I used to believe I will always have to live with depression and highs and lows. But I have been off medication now and feel really good most of the time. It does take controlling my mind and believing I don't have to live with depression anymore. What we think is what we feel is what I am learning, so I want to think good things for myself. I will continue to be praying for you and happy to chat anytime. I know those terrible dark feelings, but you don't have to stay there. Believe in yourself and that you can beat this depression and highs and lows. Lots of Hugs!

[Bee1232 in reply to lovetodance2018]

Thanks lovetodance I will keep that in mind.

[deadmanwalkingSCH]

Same with me, I have been fighting this my whole life. People that don't suffer with depression and the other crap that comes with it will never understand what we live with. They try helping and give advice on how to make it go away. They will get upset with you because they think you're not trying hard enough. They will never understand then give up on you. Talking to others with depression helps me and I think this site will help a lot of us. Never seen a doctor because I am afraid they will tell me I only have a year to live. We have to learn to live with it and fight it to the end. I have been self-medicating myself and found something that keeps me going. Not something that I would recommend. But it keeps me alive. Hang in there, friend.