Not Smoking Lifestyle Sucks.

[RickyShakaZulu]

I loved being a smoker. I was a fun and entertaining person to be around. I had friends and belonged to clubs. Great life. Now I’m over 3 years cigarette free. I hate everyone, and can’t stand this lifestyle. No friends, my marriage is on the rocks, my job even can see a change in me. Smoke free sucks. My only purpose now , is to talk shot to every anti smoker I can find. Terrible people , who think they can belittle smokers and treat them like trash. The non smoking lifestyle is shit. I will stay quit , but I will not go away softly.

[Blueruth]

Why does a cigarette make you more entertaining?

[RickyShakaZulu in reply to Blueruth]

As a non smoker I’m miserable. But give me lots of cigarettes and sprinkle some alcohol on it. I’m amazing. I guess it became a part of me and now I’m missing that part. I’m on year 4 of smoke free and I don’t feel it getting any better. Pills and therapy don’t work. I guess I will have to live an unhappy life of misery. A non smoking or drinking life.

[Blueruth in reply to RickyShakaZulu]

All they did was lesson inhibitions. They aren’t magic. Your personality is still there if you let it. Nicotine is really not your friend. It does get better.

[RickyShakaZulu in reply to Blueruth]

I’m still waiting. On year #4. Still sucks. When does it get better. Year 5,6,7,10.I’ve already waisted 3+ good years of my life as a non smoker. Miserable. Marriage is a mess. Life is a mess. I’m not happy. Everything I do is wrong and have to change. So I changed. When does it get better?

[AuntBee in reply to RickyShakaZulu]

Why did you quit smoking?

[RickyShakaZulu in reply to AuntBee]

After 3+ years, I’m not sure. I’m not happy , I’m sad , angry, and miserable. I’m not healthy, I see more doctors and have more issues.

[Blueruth in reply to RickyShakaZulu]

Waiting might be the problem you quit. Great. Your mood isn’t going to change until you decide to change it. I was listening to the writer of atomic tasks the other day. It seems applicable here. He said to be successful at changing stop focusing on a goal like “not smoking” or “be less angry”. Think about where you would like to be. For instance you want to be someone who can entertain others in a group (modify as you see fit). So what small step can you take to get there? There is honestly nothing stopping you except you. I highly recommend looking up the book because I will skip too much in my explanation. The interview is with brenè brown.

[RickyShakaZulu in reply to Blueruth]

I understand your point. I think it’s very true that we make the issues in our head. We are the enemy to happiness. That’s my issue with quitting. Shouldn’t there be more than just quit? Maybe find out why we do this, why we smoke?my life has gotten considerably worse after quitting. I’ve had zero improvement or positive outcomes. I’ve been clean for 3+ years and it’s the worst decision of my life. How is this possible? Quitting is the answer or the right thing to fo or the only option.

[Blueruth in reply to RickyShakaZulu]

I can’t answer your “why”. I can only tell you my why. I was 26 and wanted to be more active and healthy. I’m looking at new friends who don’t smoke and thinking the habit is dirty. So to your point… I quit and then 3 months later moved 5000 miles away with nothing except what fit in my car. Not just anywhere… a state that is all about being outside. There was more to my decision than cigarettes but that’s how my life changed. You might not do anything that drastic but you can use this time to find another focus. Develop a new hobby, job, skill. Maybe that leads to a business, etc, etc. Just throwing out some direction. You can even explore a bunch of things. You kind of need to figure it out on your own.

[RickyShakaZulu in reply to Blueruth]

Covid did that for my family. We started doing more outside. Now I dream for North Idaho or western Montana. I hope your move worked out. Get a Subaru, adopt a dog sticker on the back” they saved me, I didn’t save them” Osprey backpack. Salomon shoes. I’m all in now. Love that world. Still would love a coffee and cigarette in the morning.

[Blueruth in reply to RickyShakaZulu]

26 years in Colorado! You might be a fit. Subarus are the most popular cars. I hike with a group every other weekend. I have hiked two 14ers. The air is thin up there! I do a weekend canoe trip on the western slope every few years. I remember coffee with cigarette! My first job was at Starbucks. We pounded espresso shots at 5 am. I got into craft coffee and nice breakfast. I have a collection of analog coffee and espresso makers. No kurig for me! There is a whole culture around it.

[RickyShakaZulu in reply to Blueruth]

Not sure I’m ready for coffee. Some day I’ll try things I loved to do but without a cigarette. Doesn’t seem to be a reason to drink without smoking so I don’t drink alcohol or coffee. Can’t understand how people can do that. But!!!!! Someday I will. Thanks for the messages

[Blue_81 in reply to Blueruth]

Atomic habits is such a great book. I like how every little thing can add up and make a change. Little by little I know i got here in my anxiety. I can definitely see the timeline. Now i need to try and get out, one step a time. But i just feel like giving up, i feel like i fail at everything. I need to keep doing small changes for one day be free of my anxious behavior.

[Hidden]

I witnessed a beautiful friend die of COPD after far too many years of smoking. She was too young and lovely to leave this world, gasping for a breath.

Good for you for quitting. The life issues you are experiencing have nothing to do with being a non-smoker.

❄️

[RickyShakaZulu in reply to Hidden]

Our family friend can’t breath in the summer . Always coughing up and a mess. Still smokes. That’s what we should be looking into. Find out why we smoke. I’m quit for 3+ years. I’m not happy. I would never tell someone to quit.