Agoraphobia sucks

[Buttercup1982]

I've always been a nervous person, but that blew up on me in 2016. I live with agoraphobia, and I thought I was getting better, but last month when I had to go to a doctor appointment I barely made it. I managed it, but I was in a state of panic from the moment I got into the car until I wheeled my wheelchair back into my apartment. It was a slap in the face. I felt like all the healing I’ve done in the last 7 years amounted to nothing. I know that the only way I'm going to beat this is by going outside, but what's my inspiration? I have no friends, no job, no reason to leave my house. The more isolated I become, the worst the agoraphobia gets; which causes me to become more isolated. It's a cycle that I fear has no escape!

[cashew78]

You had one bad day. Everybody alive has a handful of bad days per year; it's the consequence of life. Don't let one bad day drag you down; you were presented a challenge and you overcame it. That's nothing to balk at. It means that, if push comes to shove, you know you can do it again. It won't be easy. It won't be fun. But you got it in you and you can do. Good luck. (p.s.- the outside world isn't always as cracked up as it's supposed to be; not an endorsement, but an observation. I think this means you're allowed to feel the way you do from time to time 😉 I certainly do.)

[Turnipgirl in reply to cashew78]

Everyone gets times when they feel everything goes wrong at once don't they?

This afternoon I got proved right that a place we were all interviewing for was a con and we were all supposed to be interviewing from 2pm to 3.30 this afternoon.

Everyone arrived at the venue and there was no interview and a lady cried and I had felt cross and they claimed they will be doing interviews Monday coming between 12 30 and 2pm not giving a definite time!

I thought they can get stuffed with those Monday interviews as I felt it was disgusting the way they had led everyone on and I had said there was no problem with Monday just to strong them along and what I will do Monday is let them ring me and then not answer the phone as I feel that was disgusting the way everyone got treated this afternoon!

Good riddance to them!

[gajh]

Hello and Welcome. I am so glad you have joined us. Connecting here with other people who have agoraphobia has helped me so much. I give you so much credit for making it to your doctor appointment. I know how hard that was. I know what it feels like to see no way out. Are you in therapy at all? I believe that the support you can get here can help you as it has helped me. You are not alone.

[April2024 in reply to gajh]

Group therapy must be very difficult for you all. I'm proud of you for being able to do it. Do you think you could try zoom? Maybe that would be a step for you

[Anonymousfellow]

I understand what you feel. I get that way when I get panic attacks and I want to isolate myself to avoid the situation . I learned though that it’s addictive and it gives a false sense of calm.

[April2024 in reply to Anonymousfellow]

Try the web site mytherapyaid it has helped me a lot

[bonkers65]

Good Work going to your Drs. Appointment

[Shield_Of_Faith]

Yeah I struggle with extreme social anxiety and agoraphobia. I very very rarely leave the house. I'm trying to figure how to go out more often too. It's not easy, I try here and there with a family member. I keep trying when I can find the strength that day to try. So I understand what your going through. I hope you find the strength to somehow go out and keep trying. I hope all the best!

[April2024 in reply to Shield_Of_Faith]

Is there zoom therapy you could try?

[Shield_Of_Faith in reply to April2024]

Honestly, even zoom online with people gives me anxiety. Years ago I tried a in person social anxiety group session. I lasted one week, nobody was mean or anything, it's just everyone was able to open up or even try too but I was sitting there silent, I couldn't get a word out besides hello, when I greeted them.

I should have felt comfortable with people with our shared issues but because of my anxiety i couldn't even talk to others with anxiety.

Trust me I don't even understand me.

It's sad I know but that's how bad with anxiety I am. But I do appreciate your reply!

[Starrlight]

I try to focus on going out for the sun’s vitamins and the fresh air and movement.

[April2024 in reply to Starrlight]

It really does help even for a few minutes. Have you had your vitamin d checked

[Starrlight in reply to April2024]

Good idea to check- get a bunch of bloodwork done.z I just found out I have hypothyroidism and need more bloodwork done.

[Buttercup1982 in reply to Starrlight]

I definitely don’t get enough sun. I should get my Vitamin D checked.

[Starrlight in reply to Buttercup1982]

My doc said to take 2000 iu if you do need it.

[Starrlight]

Bd good to yourself. Appreciate your efforts because it’s so hard and you’re doing it! You are- you’re getting there. ❤️

[Goldilocks11]

Hello Buttercup, my older sister was agoraphobic for a couple years after the death of our mum and our middle sister. I agree with all the members' advice and would like to add the idea of getting a dog. Your love and attachment to your dog could help you overcome your fears. Also, you'd have to go outside or your dog will not be a happy puppy. Best wishes to you and I hope my suggestion is useful, xx

[Turnipgirl in reply to Goldilocks11]

Dogs are also great friends as well same as horses are!

We have an elderly ginger tabby called Baby who is 20 years old and is spoilt!

[Goldilocks11 in reply to Turnipgirl]

Wow, that's a great age for a cat to reach, well done. Ah, I forgot about horses and you're quite right, they are so intelligent as well.

[Turnipgirl in reply to Goldilocks11]

It's because Baby is spoilt that she has reached 20 years old!

For a laugh I said to my father in law how the Ivy restaurant is a cult for spoilt pets that is in the city centre that Baby is the director of along with her brown and white tabby mate Percy who is 20 next week who is ruined as well!

Earlier on we had an upset as we had all been led to believe that they were doing interviews with us this afternoon and we had all arrived at the venue and no they weren't and they didn't even have the decency to ring us personally and explain and apologise and a lady had cried and I had felt really cross but stayed polite and felt sorry for the tutor having to fire the bullets for them and had said yes Monday would be fine as supposedly they will be ringing us for the interview between 12.30 and 2pm and I thought forget it and that's what I will be doing is forget it and go onto a place that's decent!

Monday I have an interview for 11am and then to swimming at 2!

I'm not changing my life to fit them in and I reckon those interviews didn't exist to start with but that was naughty though pulling a trick like that!

Thankfully due to coming home early I have caught up on the washing and had time to calm down and I'm glad we got to see what that place was like before it was too late!

I was glad I had made a morning of going to the city centre to do business and then attend the supposed 2.10 appointment as if I had gone there just for that I would have been furious!

[worthytobeloved]

Agorophobia is such an awful condition to have - the safety of your own home feels like a prison, but actually going out feels worse. You were so brave to get yourself to the doctors and back - take it easy now and be kind to yourself. Are you on any medication that helps? You mentioned some healing has happened over the last seven years, so maybe put this down to just one of those bad days. Remember how far you've come.

Like you, I live alone, have no family or close friends, and am isolating myself more and more. It would be lovely if we lived near each other, then we could go out together and give each other moral support! Take care, my love. x

[Buttercup1982 in reply to worthytobeloved]

I’m on a couple of meds, but trying to get in to see a psychiatrist for a reevaluation because I don't think the meds are working anymore.

[Turnipgirl]

I went through a phase last year after I was evicted and my confidence had taken a knock and hadn't wanted to have left the house out of fear horrible things would happen which I know full well is irrational but I couldn't help it.

What I did to help myself at first was have short walks out of the house and when that was easy worked up from there and lately its been hard to keep me in the house so I do feel coming home early this afternoon was a blessing in disguise after they pulled that trick on everyone with the non existent interviews and claim they are doing them on Monday and as far as I'm concerned they can get stuffed with their interviews!