It's been a week.

[Macabre]

It's only Sunday and I am already dreading this coming week. It's the week before spring break and I'm of course excited for that, but my school work is something that is just weighing me down. I'm a fashion design major and it's really a stressful major. I'm already going to be a junior this Fall and I just want to be done with college. My parents refuse to let me take a gap year as they already assume that I will just not want to go back after I take my year off to take care of my degrading mental health. Since I live under their roof, I have to go by their rules even though I'm an adult. My partner is trying everything they can to help me come live with them but COVID is keeping us apart. Everyone including my professors tell me that my health comes first but they keep increasing the work load on me and it's really negatively affecting my health. It seems like the only escape I have is sleeping as it is when I don't feel as stressed.

My parents aren't really emotionally available to help me. My mother struggles with Major Depressive Disorder and GAD and My father really only has a short temper. My mother tries to be there for me but my disorder just makes me feel so disconnected from everyone including those I feel close to. It's really annoying. I really wish I had more support from them but they always have some excuse for something I'm going through to downplay it. It makes me feel so ignored and breaks me down. I only really have myself in this whether I like it or not. I have my best friend and my partner but I know it's my battle to fight, not theirs. They support me when I need it. I just wish I didn't have to go through this constantly. Then again, we don't ask to deal with this.

[Hidden]

Hi there

May I ask, are u seeing a therapist or taking any meds? I did not see that in ur post. Depression can not be fought alone if it is getting severe. I am not on meds but it is not severe, I simply rely on forcing positive thoughts but seems you could use meds and a therapist. I love the fact that u know depression affects your mind a lot and school might be affecfed, this is why you should get meds. I am happy you do have a support system, we are also there to support u.

[Macabre in reply to Hidden]

I'm searching for a therapist and I am on medication. I know my anti-depressants are not doing as much as they used to but My psychiatrist wants to wait until I get a proper eval from a psychologist outside of my school. My college doesn't have the proper stuff to get me a full eval. Once I get time to do that, I will be placed on better meds and hopefully get better!

[Hidden in reply to Macabre]

I am happy we are moving forward. I think the therapist will have better solutions since it their job. I am glad there is help in the way

[froggymom88]

I think it is very important that you see a therapist. You need an advocate that can give you the proper professional advice and guidance. Have you inquired at school about a therapist?Most schools have one.

[Macabre in reply to froggymom88]

Yes I have, I just can't find enough time to stop and slow down so I can see someone.

[froggymom88 in reply to Macabre]

Please keep trying to get that help. Make a plan to get to a school counselor and put something less important on hold.