Ruined

[amadu]

I can’t help but feel as though I ruined my life by making all the mistakes and doing all that I did that had made it so that my ex wants nothing at all to do with me. I would give anything to be able to go back in time one year and be the person I am today instead of who I was then. That isn’t possible though, and in the present I have to suffer the consequences of the past me, by having my relationship with her and the mutual friends we had in common ruined. Guess I’m getting what I deserve. It’s clear to me now I’ll die alone and live out the rest of my time suffering with the weight of knowing I’m the reason the love of my life no longer wants anything to do with me. I have no one to blame but myself. We broke up about a year ago, and I still haven’t had anything occur to make me feel as tho this may not be the case. Instead I feel as though I am one of those people who’s first love is actually better than any subsequent love that they experience. Oh well. Better luck next life.

[FearIsALiar]

In life everyone makes mistakes. Try not to beat yourself up over it. Easier said than done I know. We will learn and grow from the past. If we never make mistakes how would we ever learn?

[ThePurpleTulip]

Hello amadu ! How are you feeling now ? I'm really sorry to hear that you are struggling with the thoughts that you ruined your life and the feeling that you lost your one chance at great love. I truly hope that your life isn't completely ruined, would you like to share with us some of the good things in your life at the present moment ? We are here to help you in your journey from sad to good to better (Clearly I am not a psychiatrist, but it also seems that you are not over your ex. If this is something that you would like, there are techniques and processes that can help, but of course I would not want to impose on you any helpful hints without knowing what you're going through)

[catch_the_music]

Hi there. Sorry that some tough things happened in your marriage. In every marriage - both parties have responsibilities - so don't feel like the burden is all on you. Accept your part of the responsibility - but as you do that - ask God for forgiveness for each thing you could have done better. That is what I have learned. We can only come clean and renew ourselves in an atmosphere of complete Forgiveness and Grace. I found out the Bible talks a lot about Grace and Peace - because we cannot go on without those! So important. Perhaps this is all new to you. I would find a good church and ask the pastor to point you to a group that can help you grow in Grace and Peace. Be sure to pray for guidance every day. Divorcecare.org is another place to check out. They have group meetings in most cities. They are a good place to find healing and talk to others in the same circumstance. God Bless! Good things are ahead for you!