I'm here for help and to give help

[Ineedtolose]

Hello, first day of joining up today and would love some support with my continuous journey of anxiety and depression, it's been most of my life and still up and down like a roller coaster with depression and anxiety. I'm just a bit at the end of my tether really, I just got a job and started off well and then things go wrong and I leave, it's just been the same patterns for like over 10years. I've tried all sorts of things but at the end of the day I just keep starting things and giving up and I don't get it? Why? Any help would be appreciated and if I can advise on anything as I have tried alot of things then give us a shout and I would love to help others in any way I can

[Hidden]

Hi and welcome to a supportive place! I hope you find the support you need here!The only one who can answer your question is you. Why do you think you do this? Is it fear of failure perhaps?

[Ineedtolose in reply to Hidden]

Thanks for reply, I think its alot of things, fear of failure, not thinking I deserve better and just bad habits from being like this for so long, it started when my parents split up and I was home alone and never went to school in the last year, every since then I have found it hard to commit to anything, stay in jobs and just anything I want to do, then my mum passed away and then I felt guilt for not doing enough, it's been my whole adult life and I'm 44 now and just fed Up being like this, it's hard

[Hidden in reply to Ineedtolose]

Wow, you've been through a lot! Are you seeing a therapist to help process it all?I am so very sorry about the loss of your mom.

[Ineedtolose in reply to Hidden]

Thank you, it was nearly 20 years ago now, that's what I mean I've been dealing with this life for 30years and don't know what else to do, I've just gotta change habits but that is so hard.

[Hidden in reply to Ineedtolose]

You're welcome. It is hard; there is no doubt about that!

[MJD-]

Hey there, do you use NHS or private treatment? Either way getting a Psychiatrist is essential with regards to expert and effective treatment plans. I can only advise you what my psychiatrist has initiated for me personally but everyone reacts differently to certain medications. Start yourself of an antidepressant which is good for augmentation therapy. Fluoxetine is the most common one and I personally get few side effects (my psychiatrist advised it’s the preferred medication for anxiety disorders that initiate depression symptoms, not the other way around. This including its high compatibility when combining many other medications. This can improve anxiety symptoms but can take years to be effective. I was given the opinion of combining with another antidepressant called mirtazapine or a combination of fluoxetine and two anti psychotics which I’ve found quite effective.

[Ineedtolose in reply to MJD-]

Thank you for reply, I have tried a few anti depressants and I have lots of side effects and don't like how I feel on them so gave up on that. NHS is my treatment and I saw a psychiatrist many years ago and they did nothing for me and said I didn't need them? That took years to be seen so it's hard because I Could of been OK at the time? I've done cbt a couple of times and I did a few weeks of counselling, that's what I mean I feel like I've tried everything and nothing helps me. Lost cause I think

[MJD- in reply to Ineedtolose]

Okay well it’s always good to get a specific diagnosis regarding what category of anxiety disorder you have and the root cause of it which can in a lot of long term anxiety symptoms be another disorder altogether but has been masked by your anxiety which commonly leads to a misdiagnosis and left untreated will cause various different symptoms. Common untreated conditions that usually present as an anxiety disorder include a personality disorder, possibly BPD or bipolar (Bipolar 1, less severe and often missed due to symptoms being less obvious and harder to identify than that of Bipolar 2) Adult ADD is quite commonly misdiagnosed and often results in anxiety symptoms especially lack of motivation and concentration in most daily activities. OCD often causes obsessive personality trait most notably obsessing over most thoughts and action pretty much making you a perfectionist who never feels satisfied. Different meds work best for each so get another referral to see a specialist Psychiatrist as there are different specialist psychiatrist for certain disorders. You should be able to get another referral on the NHS and also have a referral to a specialist therapist for instance an adult ADD practitioner. You can refer for two psyc assessments at one time on the NHS and this is your right and entitlement under UK law and NHS policy specifically your right to choose your preferred treatment. Most GPs will avoid telling you this and are advised to avoid referrals until third line treatments have shown to be ineffective. But you can and are entitled to this after only first line treatment does not work. You have to ask and even demand this because nhs policies often put cost effectiveness above the most effective treatment options. But have a legal obligation to provide certain treatments when specificity requested by patient. You can also get a referral for a CBT therapist or situation therapist for I think 12 weeks of treatments all at the same time. I’ve heard though that waiting list can be pretty long and would say private if possible is the best option.

[MJD-]

P.s you might want to look up adult ADD/ADHD or Borderline Personality Disorder as lack of commitment are core symptoms of both and when left undiagnosed usually will present anxiety and panic disorders in adulthood which tend to mask the symptoms of an untreated disorder and if found to be the root cause of your anxiety needs treatment first. If you know the cause and it’s a singular anxiety disorder the best option is to get a specific diagnosis from a psychiatrist who can identify specifically what type of anxiety it is and will usually know the best treatment plan. GP doctors cannot diagnose a mental health condition, nor can they prescribe many mental health medications and their knowledge is usually not good in regards to mental health.

[wantobefree]

Hi I’m sorry for all your suffering. I just wanted to suggest that besides everything you are doing or have done to treat anxiety/depression, if you could also trying focusing on all the good you have in you. I know that when we suffer from anxiety/depression we tend to focus on that so much that it becomes the only thing we are, it becomes who we are and we forget that there is more to us. Everyone has great qualities, things they are good at or things they would like to learn more of. How about we focus on that for a bit? What are those great qualities you have been forgetting about? What are your talents? Things you like to do or are good at? I would love to know.

[Hidden]

Honesty for now I can not give advice but I would like to say, "Welcome". You are surely in a right place. We all need the support of people who have experience with depression because only us can rely appreciate it. Welcome

[froggymom88]

Hello and welcome. You have been on a difficult journey but don't give up. I will keep you in my prayers. Hugs.