Self Destruction

[sunflower1313]

As of lately I have taken on such self destructive habits, I stopped taking care of myself, I am drinking to the point of blacking out every night, and verbally abusing my loved ones. I never thought at the age of 25 I would look at myself in the mirror and hate the woman staring back at me. I have pushed such great people in my life away because I vow to change, and then all of a sudden I am right back to my old ways. Coping with anxiety and depression has always been a struggle for me, and with each and every day I feel as if I just want to give up. Happiness doesn't seem possible when I have already destroyed so many good things around me due to substances, and not taking care of myself. How do I care for others when I barely want to be around, and I suppress these emotions by drinking to no end. Sorry for the rant, but I am barely hanging on and just need support.

[Hidden]

I am sorry you are struggling so hard....my prayer is that you know you are not alone in trying to overcome life controlling habits. I found this forum today and its given me tremendous hope....its okay to rant....sometimes you just have to release what is going on inside.

[Hidden]

Hi, I wonder what's been causing you to feel like this. At least you recognize that what you're doing isn't good. Maybe you need to figure out some better ways of coping with stress, like writing your feelings out or seeking out some therapy. I'm not doing well myself, I implode. I've been staying in bed a lot and not taking showers like I should, just avoiding reality a lot of the time. I don't drink but a lot of times I want to. I hope you try to take some steps to feel better about yourself and not take out your anger on someone who doesn't deserve it. I need to work on myself too. I wish you well.🙂