Trying to practice self compassion

[Eklektik]

Today is difficult. I spent most of my days in bed last weekend, was able to work only 3,25 hrs on Monday (my goal is 3hrs, so it still is not bad), but yesterday I spent again all day in bed, feeling terribly guilty whenever I was awake. This morning I got up and attended a one hour meeting, it went OK, but now I have a hard time getting to work. I am fighting the urge to go back to bed. What helps in not going back to bed is I don't want for the guilt to get worse. I decided I would work in small time installments today. Even that is difficult and I feel guilty for it, so that is why I am trying to practice self compassion. So, talking to myself : kudos for staying up when it is so difficult, take it easy for the work sessions, make it 15 minutes at a time if necessary, what you are going through is difficult and I empathize with you.

Sigh.

[Twitch7119]

Self compassion is important but hard to do. I always beat myself up for every little thing I do wrong I always feel like a screw up and that what makes self compassion so difficult keep pushing forward friend.

[Eklektik in reply to Twitch7119]

Hi Twitch7119 , thanks for you kind word. Are you a perfectionist perhaps? We all make mistakes, and that does not make you a screw up. The thing is, there is such a social pressure to be perfect, it is unhealthy. I saw your profile and you seem to be struggling with anxiety. I have gone through an extensive workshop to learn how to self manage anxiety, and there was a part of the workshop on perfectionism and anxiety often being intertwined. If you think it applies to you, google "perfectionism and anxiety", there are loads of stuff about it. In any case, I wish you well, and thanks again

[Twitch7119 in reply to Eklektik]

Thank you I am a bit of a protectionist thank you for the information I will definitely check it out.

[Marysblue]

Sounds like you re doin some good self care. High 5 yourself in the mirror and congrat yourself.Like you said remind yourself you're going through a hard time , and remember all people go through hard times. And you'll get through it.

I deal with the same problem, I know how tough it is. I have such lack of motivation. But like you said when you get something done, you don't feel guilty and you get a reward for it. I

saw something titled radical self care and I like the sound of that.

[Eklektik in reply to Marysblue]

Hello Marysblue , thanks for the encouragement. Lack of motivation is SO heavy, I hear you. I'm sorry you are going through that as well. You talk about "radical self care", I wonder if it has to do with something I saw : fierce self compassion. Those are always good avenues to explore and I eventually will. It's nice that there is an abundance of resources. Be well!

[Midori]

That's what I do Eklektik,

I work for a few minutes, rest and then get up and do it again. Stops you getting too stiff as well,

Cheers Midori

[Eklektik in reply to Midori]

Hi Midori , you have lots of physical ailments to contend with, I admire your perseverance. Thanks for the encouragement and hope you are well

[Midori]

I'm getting there, slowly! at the moment I'm having trouble keeping up with a tortoise, but I will make it. Stubborn old bat, me!

Cheers, Midori

[Eklektik in reply to Midori]

Stubbornness can be good Actually, I think it is necessary when dealing with chronic illness unless you have a bottomless supply of patience... or do they come together somehow? Is stubbornness a form of aggressive patience?

[Midori in reply to Eklektik]

Interesting idea. In my case, I think, yes!

Actually, I am a retired nurse, so probably a bit of both.

Cheers, Midori

[Against_the_current]

Self-compassion is really the best here. I think you can find some exercises and meditations online. But just as a way of thinking it's best. I also can't work at all. I have university classes and i gave my best just to get through them. Everyone is telling me working is my only way out (of my specific situation) but i can't even make it through classes. I panic. But still i'm trying the self-compassion telling myself - i haven't dropped out, i'm still in class, i'm still giving my best, i'm still writing every assignment on time, People who have it better than me dropped out or don't Come to class, i not only go to class but i carry the disscusions. Focus on your accivements. People my Age are getting jobs and stuff and for me just not giving up is an accivement which nobody sees and that's why it's so important to recognize yourself and this is self-compassion and you said it so good because this is needed here

[Eklektik in reply to Against_the_current]

Well, you do seem to make it through classes despite the panic, that is downright heroic and is quite the achievement. Bravo! Acceptance Commitment Therapy (ACT) recommends accepting what we feel and think, without being too attached to it and without fighting it, especially when it is painful. This can allow us to do things that are in accordance with our values instead of being completely eaten by the pain. Education seems to be a strong value for you, and it looks like you can keep being in movement by realizing a goal in accordance with that value. This is a good ground to getting better. I'm glad you are practicing self compassion. You absolutely deserve compassion. You actually have my compassion AND admiration. You would deserve compassion if you were to drop out of classes too. You are making such efforts. I'm rooting for you. I hope you are having a nice day

[Against_the_current in reply to Eklektik]

Thank youu. I actually was in a program that had ACT video lessons but it Ended this week, i still watched them and try to hold to them. You recognized it so well. Also you're always worth of self-compassion too. Hope you're feeling better ❤️