Just venting, even if I'm talking to myself

I'd like a lot of people on here to know that I do read a lot of other posts on here and I really do care about what many people are going through, a lot of times I just don't know what to say or what I can say that would be particularly helpful. Sometimes I just wish I could reach through this screen and give people a big hug and just tell you do not give up. Don't give up hope that things will get better, even if you've been suffering for months or even years. I believe in you. And if you don't have any friends, well, I don't either and that doesn't mean we aren't loveable people. A lot of times people come and go. There's a lot of wonderful people on this site and I want to acknowledge you. You are more than your pain and sadness. You have so much to live for, and don't fret about your age no matter how old you are. Even if you don't have a job, you are a worthwhile person, and always believe that. Keep trying to make your way in this world, so many people who are successful were NOT always that way, they just kept on trying and didn't give up. Always believe that when God closes a door, he opens a window!!!! And I'm writing all of this because this is the kind of positive motivation that I need to hear myself. I've just spent some time on YouTube trying to listen to some motivational videos that just weren't doing anything for me. I keep trying to listen to stuff by Eckhardt Tolle because so many people are into his books and teachings and I'm sorry, something about that guy just irks me!!! I can stand listening to Gary Zukoff a lot easier than I can Eckhardt Tolle. I think I'm all YouTubed out!!!! I was a big fan of Dr Ramani because she has some great videos on dealing with narcisstic people but I'm getting tired of her too. It doesn't change the fact that some of us are in living situations where until we can break free financially, we are stuck with the narcissists unless we want to be homeless. I wish all of you on here a great night!!! I have been staying in my parents basement all day to stay away from toxic family members, negativity and hate are too catching. I'm venturing upstairs now to do some artwork, wish me luck.

[Hidden]

Thank you. I went upstairs for 20 minutes and came back down because my mom started blasting this weird old movie on the TV. My family really drives me insane, I've got to come up with some plan to get out of here, with the pandemic I have to accept that until there's a vaccine, I really don't want to make any plans to go back to college or a trade school. I am going to apply for more part time jobs.

[Puzzled57]

(Not a big fan of Eckhardt Tolle either.) Stopped seeing a therapist who was really into his stuff. Thank you for your positivity! It’s hard to be that way sometimes in these times of isolation and division. We all need to know we are not alone. While we may not be able to be physically present, we are in each other’s thoughts and texts. Stay strong and be safe!!!

[Hidden in reply to Puzzled57]

Thank you!!!! Yes, WHAT is it about Eckhardt Tolle???? I like some other people Oprah has promoted, but that guy just aggravates me. And I don't like Dr. Phil either, I think he has a lousy attitude himself. Who do I like??? I like some books written by Barbara DeAngelis. And I really do like Dr Ramani, I just feel like I've been watching her channel for too long as a way of coping and I need to branch out and take more action in helping myself.

[Puzzled57 in reply to Hidden]

Have you read The Four Agreements? Some of it is out there but I like the basic premise. Tolle gets on my nerves as well. Not sure why. I have not heard of Ramani. I appreciate Henri Nouwen’s writing though he is a priest and I am more of a humanist. His message is relevant though. I haven’t really found a secular motivator yet. Keep looking!!

[Hidden in reply to Puzzled57]

I've heard of the Four Agreements, did you read it and like it??? And who is Henri Nouen-ok, sorry if that's spelled wrong- how did you hear of him??? I used to love to read, but lately I've been trying to read a bunch of books that I feel really dissatisfied or bored with. I don't know if it's because I'm online too much or if I just feel too stagnant, whatever is going on with me I suppose I feel like I'm sleepwalking through life these days and I need to be more active.

[Puzzled57 in reply to Hidden]

I read The Four Agreements and have a copy that I go back to when I get self-absorbed. I was involved in the Catholic Church at one point and read a lot of different theologies. Nouwen is very community minded. I love to read but I’m very selective. I get angry and lost when I spend too much time online. I read about all the horrible things that are going on or I realize how isolated I have become. I feel you.

[Hidden]

There really is no real plan here, but I'm tired of being stagnant!!! I have all these ideas churning in my head. I have to get myself a new phone tomorrow, I keep procrastinating because I don't want to pay the money. I need to get a laptop computer too, and both of those things will wipe me out. Just feeling desperate and frustrated. And so far from where I would like to be. Thank you for caring. Could I send you a personal message sometime???

[Starrlight]

❤️ i often leave a heart when my mind goes blank to show support and love. Best to you. Wish I could see your art.

[Hidden in reply to Starrlight]

Thank you. My art isn't much right now, I'm scribbling and doodling things with colored pencils. I used to try to draw different objects. How have you been? I hope you are well.

[Starrlight in reply to Hidden]

Cool. I’m okay, thanks. Art is so good as a creative release. I can’t seem to get myself to do it anymore. Keep it up my friend!