Negative thoughts

[mimii]

Does anyone have any tips on how to deal with negative thoughts and regrets the same things go round and round in my mind there's nothing I can do to change the past so there's no point keep thinking about it can't get it off my mind though it's so depressing !

[Celtic27]

As you've said it's no use looking back all the time it does you no good and leads to depressive thoughts the best thing to do I'd to try and put the past in the past and concentrate on now ! If your finding it to hard try asking your doctor for help or advice I wish you all the best david

[mimii in reply to Celtic27]

Thanks I've tried focussing on the now but now is pretty awful I guess the answer is making the now better if that's possible it would have been better if I'd not made a stupid decision oh there I'm doing it again !

[VeggieLover21]

A few things that have helped me are to write the circling thoughts down or talk through them aloud to someone. They might keep coming back because you haven't fully made peace or processed them. Be curious about the thoughts but don't let them linger too long. I often feel like a broken record and don't want to burden others with the same old tune but have learned talking through things helped me sort them out. It also can reveal hidden feelings or stuck spots. Thinking of the broken record analogy you could always tell yourself "I'm done with that genre of music for now" and focus on happy memories for awhile.

Some advice I've recieved is to set aside a specific time to focus on the regret/ negative thoughts. That way when they come up you say to yourself "I will write that down and come back to it at 3pm" (I haven't tried this method but I've heard it's helpful).

Another thing is to add a helpful thought or counter thought to the negative one... example "I made a dumb mistake." Can become "I made the best choice given the information I had at the time. It turned out poorly. It still makes me feel sad or defeated but I've leaned from that situation how to act/ react differently in the future" ...

Regret really is a waste of time. It prevents you from living in the moment and from dreaming or having hope about the future. Hope my thoughts help. It's not easy but awareness is everything. By realizing you are in a bad thought pattern you are already making steps to break the habit!

[mimii in reply to VeggieLover21]

Thankyou so much your advice is really encouraging and helpful I will keep referring to it often x

[mimii in reply to VeggieLover21]

I like the part about making the best choice with the information I had at the time

[Sprinkle1]

I have a little trick I have used and shared with others. In my brain there is a school crossing guard with its big STOP sign. When I get negative thoughts I ask the guard to come out, it does with its big sign and I yell stop. Then I put my mind on something fun to do today, call a friend and have a chat, weather permitting go for a walk in nature, ride your bike if you have one. Do some meditating it will clear junk out of your mind. I also love Hatha Yoga, it is a great stress reliever, good for mind, body and soul. I live free most of the time now, and can cut the thoughts off in seconds. Play some nice music, dance around you living room. Do a jigsaw puzzle, I love coloring books. There are a lot of things you can do to distract yourself. Practice

good mental health, you will be glad you do, I live free and happy and so can You. Write to us here, we will do our best to help you, giving you love, support, sending peace........

[mimii in reply to Sprinkle1]

Thankyou so much you are inspirational x

[Hidden]

For me (and I know there are other reasons), my PTSD generated the repetitive thoughts. I had LOTS of help over the years, but EMDR was the most help over the shortest time.

Putting it out of your mind generally doesn't work, but interrupting the thought/image cycle in the brain worked very well for me. Half the time during the emdr treatment I would laugh at "whatever it was" because it suddenly made no sense... or even better, I would stop remembering the repetitive thought and feel fine.

[mimii in reply to Hidden]

Thankyou x

[Sprinkle1]

Hi its me again, journal-ling is great, I used to do it for years, I wrote down my thoughts and feelings, it helps let the pressure off. At a later date you can go back and read it, it is good as you can see how you are growing. Please be kind to yourself, do Not put Yourself Down, remember you are a special person with your own gifts and talents. I am sure you have people that love you, you need to Love You, respect yourself and accept yourself for the person you are. Life is full of pain and suffering and glorious moments. I read a quote today and wrote it down. "Who is the happier man/woman, he who has braved the storms of life and lived, or s/he who has stayed securely on shore and merely existed".... Let me tell you at 78 I have had a rough and hectic life, fought many battles and come out stronger and more knowledgeable, I learnt to live in the moment 20 years ago, it is wonderful. I worry about nothing. A great book I read years ago by Dr. Scott Peck "The Road Less Traveled" it was in the top ten best seller list for 7 years, Amazon has it new/used. It was a big help to me. So like I said, please be kind to yourself, love yourself, accept who you are, none of us are perfect. I send you from by bottomless well, Love and Big Hugs........xxx ooo

[mimii]

Thanks again I'm the age when you learnt live in the moment so there is hope for me yet ! Love and hugs to you too xx

[pandaeyes1]

I think it’s important and commendable that you realize that you have spiraling thoughts and they are not productive. It means you have insight! I think that in itself can be very difficult. I think the next helpful thing is to notice when the thoughts start to spiral so you can do something about it in time. It’s incredibly hard to do, and it’s impossible to always be successful. But recognizing it early on can allow you to work on coping strategies when you still have the ability to. Sorry not sure if this is helpful??

[mimii in reply to pandaeyes1]

Thankyou yes that is helpful I appreciate any advice and it's heartwarming that people on here help others when they are struggling themselves

[pandaeyes1 in reply to mimii]

Gotta lean on each other! D

[Hidden]

I needed to read this today. If I could only put all of this into practice. I did stuff in my recent past that I am very ashamed of. All done as a response to trauma....my life is a living hell because I cannot stop thinking about what I did to someone...who has forgiven me....looking for a good Emdr therapist but the waiting lists are long.

So, for now I am just getting used to be depressed...not fun.

[mimii in reply to Hidden]

If only we could switch our minds off ! I'm still struggling with regrets hope it gets better for us all x

[Hidden in reply to mimii]

When you find the switch, please let me know,