Depressed!

[AllTimeLow]

Trying to cope with so many painful memories and so many bad decisions. So many regrets.

[Mary-intussuception]

I think we need to find a way to forgive ourselves and move forward. There have most likely been many good decisions made, good things done, but sadly they seem to get 'lost' , forgotten about, when we become overwhelmed by the memory of our mistakes and regrets.

We can't change the past but we can leave it there - in the past - accept and forgive and make a positive decision to 'start over' .

[AllTimeLow in reply to Mary-intussuception]

Good comment. You're right about it being overwhelming.

[Mary-intussuception in reply to AllTimeLow]

How are you feeling now?

Do you think it helps to recall the good/positive things you've done?

Would you like to explain a bit more about the job, why it's so depressing?

Is it bringing back bad memories?

[AllTimeLow in reply to Mary-intussuception]

The thought of going to the retail store to walk around for 8 hours as a security guard does not fill me with joy. I'm probably not well.

[Mary-intussuception in reply to AllTimeLow]

Finding a job we really want and will enjoy doing can be so difficult can't it.

Are you looking for something else?

What would you really like to do.

Have you considered some part time study for a qualification that might help when trying for a different job?

[AllTimeLow in reply to Mary-intussuception]

With the way things have gone I am thinking quite likely I will go to the grave without ever deciding what it is that I really want to do. I suppose this happens in life.

[Mary-intussuception in reply to AllTimeLow]

Isn't it down to us to take control of our own life.

If you're undecided about what you really want, you at least know that you don't want to be a store Security Guard.

Any course of study - evening Art Class, English Language Class, Learn Spanish, a craft group, exercise class, pottery course, Literature class, Book Club, the list is endless - will get you out once a week and meeting people in a relaxed atmosphere.

If your not happy in your job, look for another job. But I wouldn't leave without finding a new job first.

Is there any social life with other members of staff ? Any organised events? Such as a Bowls night or a meal out?

[AllTimeLow in reply to Mary-intussuception]

Really good answer! No, there is not any social interaction. Post orders say fraternization with store staff is prohibited.

You're right about not leaving this job until I find another job. I'll have no money. No way to pay the bills. But what job to find?

When I look back on my work history I see a big problem that developed in March 1991 when I suddenly quit a job without first finding a new job. There were other problems as well. I've been trying to find and keep a job unsuccessfully for 28 years.

[AllTimeLow in reply to AllTimeLow]

You're right. We have to take control of our own lives. I've had difficulty doing that. A lot of difficulty.

[AllTimeLow in reply to AllTimeLow]

So I have unsuccessfully tried to solve this problem for 29 years, become burnt out in the process and dread having to go walk around a retail store as a security guard in 3 hours.

[Mary-intussuception in reply to AllTimeLow]

I used to have feelings of dread before work, but was ok after getting there and starting shift.

Hope you get through the next 5 hours ok.

Thinking of you.

[AllTimeLow in reply to Mary-intussuception]

I got very depressed after leaving work today thinking about what I'm doing for a job.