One more thing I get to lose.

[DemureRose]

When my school finally announced a rescheduled date for graduation, I thought that I had finally gotten all that I needed.

But I hadn’t realized that with my focus on graduation, I had completely forgotten by senior trip.

A trip to Paris and London. A trip that I had been planning with my grandmother since I was a little girl. A trip that had been one of the only things that got me through the hell of high school.

A trip that has now been postponed...indefinitely.

I know that there are some who think I am completely selfish for being so heartbroken about a trip when their are people out there dying, but in my world, I am the only one being affected by this.

I have had to live through these last months as though they were nothing special, when in fact they were so very important. In quarantine, I watched my prom date pass by, baseball season pass by, last day of school and graduation all just pass by. Meaningless dates that once were so important.

Now, I have to spend the next three months watching as a summer that was supposed to be filled with relief, excitement and anticipation, instead be filled with sadness, helplessness and want. This summer was one I had been counting down the days for since I was 13, when school and life started to get really hard. The summer where all that was in front of me was hope and something new. And what’s worse is it’s not like I can plan a reschedule date.

In the event that my senior trip couldn’t take place (my cousin became pregnant and her due date was in the middle of my original senior trip), I had planned on rescheduling it to the fall or spring. Now, I don’t even know if I can plan for the next year with how crazy things are.

I’m just tired of having to give up things over and over again.

[Hidden]

So sorry you’re dealing with this! There’s so many other seniors in your shoes too. You’re definitely not alone.

[hj__]

I am also a senior this year. Last night was supposed to be my graduation date so I understand when you say those once-important days have become meaningless. I'm so sorry you weren't able to go on that trip with your grandmother - I have always had a dream of traveling and I can't imagine having it so close only for it to be taken away. I believe our hands are open for God to give and to take away. Sometimes it feels like we lose more than we get, but I believe it is the other way around. I planned for the graduation of my dreams, but I didn't plan for my sister to be expecting her first baby this summer. There is absolutely still hope and something new in front of us. We might not see it yet and it might not look the way we'd planned, but our future isn't cancelled. I pray you get to go on your trip sooner rather than later, but I also pray we are both blessed in ways we didn't plan while we're waiting.