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[DJB74]

Hello, Im on here again with an S.O.S. of sorts. Im doing tons better than I was two years ago however I still want to "level up" and not just stay better but want to continue toward my best. One of the recurring thoughts and issues for myself is I need friends. I have none that I can count on and grow with. Im also the type of person that likes tranparency and would like my friends and I to become comfortable enough to share most everything with each other. Someone to just vent to, seek advice/encouragement from, help each other through our daily struggles with our "weights" . Someone i can at least message daily even if its, Hi, how are things?, etc. Maybe even someone to talk with via phone or maybe even in person. If anyone feels the same let our friendship begin, please!

[anxiousalexis]

hi! i hope you’re continuing to do well. we’re all friends here going thru a lot of the same things and problems. so keep writing on here and making new friends. there’s also where you can do private messages. also keep going out and making friends around you. there are many people out there, you just gotta keep looking.

[Rick1on1]

Hi new friend, we can chat here or in a pm.

Have a great day!

[DJB74 in reply to Rick1on1]

Sounds great. I hope you are doing well,,, and I am looking forward to getting to know you better

[Rick1on1 in reply to DJB74]

Where you from?

[DJB74 in reply to Rick1on1]

Im from Missouri in the US. How about yourself?

[Rick1on1 in reply to DJB74]

What you doing up? Its about 5am right? lol

I'm in Cape Town, South Africa.

[DJB74 in reply to Rick1on1]

You are right itss 5am here. What time is it there? I actually work 4am to 1pm for my full time job then afterwards i work with my side cleaning business until 430 or 5 pm. Ive found the busier I am the slightly better I can control thoughts, impulses etc. Also owning a pretty successful side business has helped establish a better self esteem and image. I have a slightly better idea of control over some of my life. So tell me more about you?

[Rick1on1 in reply to DJB74]

It was noon when I messaged. We about 7 hrs ahead of the mid-west. That's a busy schedule - what's your fulltime job? I'm currently not working but writing a novel.

So, true - the less time we give our minds to over-think, the more calm we are. I start getting crazy anxious when I'm late - then I berate myself. Most times I can laugh at myself after.

I'm starting a herbal business soon that I want my brother to run with. With no income my savings are doing a Usain Bolt

A good self image is so important - for years I felt idiotic, ugly and irrelevant. Now, I am happy with who I am (belly fat and all) and life is just getting simpler.

Quick stats; I'm 47, male, 10 year old son, divorced and looking for my next girlfriend

Can we still call them girlfriends at our age? lol

[DJB74 in reply to Rick1on1]

Im 46, ive been marrid 27 yrs. I have 4 biological kids 1 daughter 22, 3sons one 19,, 11 and 8. Then two adopted children a brother11 and sister 13. I actually am a custodian for full time work. Yes i usually work 11 to 12 hrs perday Monday thru Friday then in Saturdays anywhere from 3 to 10 hrs. Ive always felt the same way you did above as well and now thats changing a lot. Yes i would still consider us young enough to atill be looking for girlfriends. Lol

[Rick1on1 in reply to DJB74]

27 yrs Wow! Pat yourself on the back - I only managed 5 years and then I was running for the hills - lol - it was not that bad. The divorce was around the time I had my biggest breakdown and the relationship came to ruin. I do blame myself for it but there is another side to the story and I just handled it all very poorly.

Geez bro - 6 kids - how do you do that? My son gives me a couple of grey hairs everyday

You a sports guy?

[DJB74 in reply to Rick1on1]

Yes sir. Especially baseball and nfl

[Rick1on1 in reply to DJB74]

I wish we had the grid-iron here. Would have loved to play when when I was still fit. I played Rugby for 19 years. That left a big gap in my life when I stopped playing. It all added to the break-down a few years later.

Your morning's about to start - have a good day!

[Hidden]

Hi,

I commented on one of your comments yesterday, and I just wanted to say I'm sorry for what I said.

I think most people are very supportive here (I try to be) but I am feeling like I just can't connect with anyone here. (After a year)I don't know why this is (maybe I'm too passive? ) But anyway, I probably should keep comments like that to myself. You probably can make friends here, no problem. I think it takes courage to reach out like that and I wish you the best.

[DJB74 in reply to Hidden]

You too. I didn't take it personally. I know what I need and Ive just got to be patient. In fact ive been on here two years and dropped off because the first time I posted something similar. I was told this wasnt a dating site etc. I know. Im not looking for dates. Im looking for genuine friends and people like me to know better. If youd like to try again and get to know one other that would be just fine by me.

[Hidden in reply to DJB74]

Thank you. I am going to start following your posts. Take care!

[DJB74 in reply to Hidden]

You too, brother

[Hidden in reply to DJB74]

How are things going for you today?

[DJB74 in reply to Hidden]

Not bad. Early mornings are rough because im alone and my mine tortures me but as people come in things improve

[Hidden in reply to DJB74]

Good.

I'm the same way, people help (although sometimes they are the problem too )

Have a good morning!

[DJB74 in reply to Hidden]

Very tru. Hows your day? Things with you?

[Hidden in reply to DJB74]

It's o.k. I have a little dip in mood which I'm trying to work through. Sometimes work is a decent anti-depressant!

[DJB74 in reply to Hidden]

Yes i work 2 jobs about 11 hour days 5 days a week sometimes 6 but it is decent therapy most days

[CanuckAnon in reply to DJB74]

Considering I have been approached by some creep on this site specifically for dating which really freaked me out... I have never gotten that vibe from you. I always have found your posts genuine... I’m happy to see you looking to really better yourself to be the best possible you.

[DJB74 in reply to CanuckAnon]

I promise you 100 percent Im just needing close friends i can opeen up to. I just typically relate more to women because for the most po art they are empaths like myself and thats what I need is to connect with my people to help me understand more about me and me doing the same for others, so that we may all achieve peace of sorts and happiness. Im just the type of person that seems withdrawn to most but to the right people I lovee to open my heart and soul to. Thats what I also want to be for everyone else.😀

[CanuckAnon in reply to DJB74]

I’m actually the same way. I find I relate to guys better than girls for most part for opposite reason... I prefer logic over emotions... lol 😂 emotions are draining for me all the time... I feel everything...I’m working on detachment😊

[DJB74 in reply to CanuckAnon]

Perfect we may make a good team then. Im excited

[Brennarae]

Just wanted to say hello. I'm new to this but have struggled with depression most of my life. I'm from northern Wisconsin but now I'm in California. I'm a veterinary nurse so I get to play with animals all day.😊 Always looking for like minded friends who also struggle with life. So I'm here if u don't mind talking to a girl😁

[Rick1on1 in reply to Brennarae]

I love girls - can I chat to you too

[Brennarae in reply to Rick1on1]

Of course how are u? I'm on my way to work right now but I hope u have a great day. I struggle everyday with depression and boy it's not easy. Im always telling myself to breathe sometimes it works. Take care

[Rick1on1 in reply to Brennarae]

Hi - I'm well thanks. Restless legs acting up right now

I've been struggling for more years than I care to remember. I'm in a good space right now so just need to keep doing what I'm doing.

What else do you do to cope?

[DJB74 in reply to Rick1on1]

I always try to make time for something I enjoy. For me its coaching, the game of baseball and its environment and teaching gives me purpose. My growing business. Although it wears me down physically a bit, it has done wonders for my self confidence which allows me to combat some of my demons of youre dumb, insignificant, useless, etc. Im able to do more for family. I love to garden and work decorating my yard. My dogs too. Pluss when im at work real early by myself.... Music

[Rick1on1 in reply to DJB74]

That's great DJ!

Sounds like you have a full life and your MH issues are not debilitating you in any way?

[DJB74 in reply to Rick1on1]

Tgey do. I want to hang myself everyday. But i cant because it woukd be more damaging to my kids mh

[Rick1on1 in reply to DJB74]

I'm so sorry to hear that bud. Do you want to talk about it in a pm?

[DJB74 in reply to Rick1on1]

Yeah thatll be cool

[DJB74 in reply to Brennarae]

Hello Brennarae, thank you for reaching out. Id love to talk, share and listen. Its just so hard in this world with tge struggles we have to feel alone. It hurts to feel lost and isolated. When you can even feel the people around you doubt you or gt aggravated at you because you have issues even though they say they dont but you feel it because your empathetic. Then people tell you what you do and dont feel and blame it on your "illness " or just say your insecure. No I know what I feel. It would b just so nice to communicate with people who really gt it. Does that make sense? Looking forward to getting to know more of you. Honestly although im a man im more emotional and relate more to women anyways.

[Brennarae in reply to DJB74]

Good morning thought I'd say hi before I go to work. I don't have many friends because trusting us hard for me. I just recently broke up with my boyfriend. He was a little abusive and I realized I deserved way better. I'm still pretty lonely. I have 2 roommates but I just stay in my room. I go to work go to the gym then come home. Socializing has just been hard for me. I hop u have a great day😊

[DJB74 in reply to Brennarae]

I get it totally. Socializing is hard for me ive had tons of hurts from when I passtored 8 years ago. When I really open up most people think im too different so i get "ghosted" so its hard to trust. Thanks for taking the time to say hello. I hope your day at work goes well. Im looking forward to getting to know you better

[Rick1on1 in reply to Brennarae]

I can call you Brenn?

That's the biggest hurt is'nt it - Trust betrayed. Had some buddies that stole from me and the anger did not go away for a long time. I have opened myself up again but much more wary.

Sorry to hear about your BF but good for you that you got out of an abusive relationship. That takes courage - keep on sister ;-).

I broke up with my GF a few weeks ago. Ultimately, she does not trust me although I have never given any reason not to. I could not handle the insane jealously anymore, as it ruined much of the time we spent together.

I just attended my son's sports day and although there was many people I know on a "Hi" basis, I still sat to one side and kept to myself. I call myself socially awkward

Have an awesome day guys!

[Rick1on1 in reply to DJB74]

Just remember you not alone DJ!