Guy friend

[raphnn]

A friend of mine recently reached out to me to vent about her life. She is doing great but is faced with a dilemma.

She has a guy friend who she known for a while, and she thinks that he may have feelings for her. She is in a relationship, however she is tempted to make a move on her guy friend. She claimed that they had so many opportunities to further their friendship but she backed out because she thought about her boyfriend. She feels that if her guy friend does end up making a move she won’t tell him to stop.

She loves her boyfriend and loves her guy friend what should she do?

Ps: I’ve advised her to discuss to her boyfriend that she wants an open relationship. If he refuses she should break up with him or fight the urges to cheat, however, if he accepts she can pursue her guy friend.

[Hidden]

I’m old fashioned. You said she loves both, looks like your idea would allow her to play both guys and doesn’t seem fair.

She should listen to her heart. Not her head, the one that treats her the way she wants to be treated and the one she might could see waking up next to long term.

[CanuckAnon]

I’m old fashioned so if this guy is a true friend he won’t make a move as she is in a relationship. She can’t be that happy in her current relationship if she is considering not saying no to a hypothetical potential advance. I think she should have a frank discussion with friend then after make a decision and not allow anything to happen until she speaks to her boyfriend. Betrayal and infidelity are the worst hurts that someone can inflict knowingly on someone else!

[Hidden in reply to CanuckAnon]

This is true to. One eye open while with another guy means to me she’s already been ‘shopping around’ and not that happy in the relationships she’s in. We don’t look, and certainly don’t look to make moves...heck she’s in enough contact with other guy that there have been opportunities to act on it. Sounds like emotional cheating already going on. Feel for the the guy she’s with.

I should revise my advice now that I think about this more. 😊

[raphnn in reply to Hidden]

That’s a good one. I’ll let her know.