I just finished a great date with a guy I reconnected with from 5 years ago. Now my anxiety kicks in. Do I text him or wait for him to contact me? I want opinions please💛
What do I do after a great date? - Anxiety and Depre...
What do I do after a great date?
63 Replies
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I love the feeling of reconnecting with a past soul. To answer your question, I would let him text you, then ask him if a second date could be a plan! Best of luck! 💚
in reply to softhearthealing
That’s what I’m thinking. I’m gonna be patient and not let my anxiety cause me to want to control things. Allowing joy is new for me. Thank you💛
If you break up with him it's better to let him go and foucs on healing yourself
in reply to lb2020
It was a great first date
He mentioned wanting me to see the new house he built. I’m sure we will see each other again but waiting is so hard!! Especially with my anxiety. I know patience is important and I can rush things. Posting here helps. Thanks Square251!💛
The thoughts are like a train leaving the station. Once it’s picking up steam, it feels so hard to interrupt. That’s why I’m posting here! This really helps. I’m so glad you are working on your costume! I hope you will post photos please🤗
So excited to see! Happy for you friend🤗💛
That's awesome things went so well....for me I would wait for him to contact me.... remember men are hunters by nature...so let him do the hunting...
All the best for you...
Sparkles & dump trucks nc007!
in reply to
I know the answer but I needed encouragement. Thanks PeachyLisa! I decided to post here instead of my anxiety taking over. I knew you all would help. Thank you🤗💛
in reply to
I figured you knew what to do... you asked and look at the replies already.....keep your power...even more so now...
Sparkles & dump trucks nc007!
in reply to
Thanks PeachyLisa I’ve never felt this in control of my anxiety and depression 💛
in reply to
That is fabulous....you've got this and will do the right thing.... I just know it!
Yepper doodles more sparkles & dump trucks nc007!
in reply to
I’m scooping up all the sparkles and dump trucks. Thank you friend 💛
in reply to
I'm happy you're diggin em!
Yeppers more sparkles & dump trucks nc007!
in reply to
I’m shoveling them all in!!
in reply to
Hahaha.. I'm lovin it!
Get ready ...here come more...
Sparkles & dump trucks nc007!
in reply to
I’ll never get tired of that. Keep em comin!!🤗
in reply to
No problem there... my supply is endless....
More and more sparkles and dump trucks nc007!
in reply to
Let em rain down on me!! 🥰
Nice to know the date went well..
And your answer to today's question is..
Call him... if you want it go for it...
Sometimes even us men are hoping for a call. Sometimes we give it a few days to see how intrested the woman actually is.
I say give him a call, now n days you dont wanna waste no time we ain't getting younger and what's the worst that could happen right?..
Goodluck and keep us posted.
If you like I can call him for you in a man's voice and be like hey there sugar, did you enjoy your night with me. I was just thinking about you and me in a hot tub and you eating chocalate from my chest 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣...
Nah better u just call him
That'll be hilarious...
in reply to
I appreciate the offer QuichIsOnFire! I’m going to give it a bit. I’m learning patience and to trust the other person to do what would be good for both of us in my friendships and now possible dating. I’ve been unsuccessful up until now but this feels different. I hope Dolphin weighs in too😁💛
in reply to
What ever your heart tells you follow it..
You are doing the right thing by giving it some time ... two hearts will come together through gods plan.
♥️♥️🌹
in reply to
I agree!! Just going to let myself enjoy this instead of being anxious💛
Honestly I’m gay so I may not have the best advice, but before I realized I was gay I dated a few guys and my mom always said that you have to teach guys how to treat you. So who ever the conversation is started by I would talk to him be open. You don’t have to get too personal considering y’all just started this up but let him know where you’re coming from. Like let him know who you are and relationships are at 2 way street so let him know that it’s not all on him to start everything or lead every thing but that you would like him to meet you half way weather it’s texting or anything else so that y’all both feel comfortable coming to each other with talking, making plans or whatever.
in reply to Bay23
That is such good advice. Being honest with my feelings will be new. My depression and anxiety always clouded my judgement. This will be the first time dating managing my symptoms so well. Communicating and setting boundaries will be brand new too. My mom always used to say we teach people how to treat us. Such a good reminder thank you!!💛
Bay23 in reply to
Also something that I learned in therapy is that a lot of people run thing based off emotions which is common with depression but the problem with depression is it comes with self doubt so when u have a lot of self doubt you sometimes have to step back and look at the facts so that way ur not leading with clouded judgement like maybe he hasn’t texted u because he’s got the same fear so maybe he’s waiting for u to break the ice or he’s busy and wants to text u but hasn’t gotten there yet so be as open as u feel comfortable with and know openness and relationships both take time and so doesn’t trust.
I'm here and I 100% agree with Quichisonfire. Life is too short. The rules have changed. I would call him.
in reply to Dolphin14
Hi Dolphin! He just text me he had so much fun 😍
Dolphin14 in reply to
Sweet! The door is open now. Doors open both ways. It's 2020. If you want something go after it.
hi 007 this is great like watching a hallmark movie 😀....my opinion is call him tell him what colour scheme you want in the bedroom of new house....don’t hang around ....just do it ☎️
in reply to Sillysausage234
At least it isn’t a Lifetime movie. That would be too hard with my anxiety!! 😂😉
Talk to him the next day. Start out saying in the morning or whenever you wake up. “Good morning or Good afternoon, I enjoyed our outing last night. It was really nice seeing you again after 5 years. We should hangout more like old times😊.”
in reply to Bray1567
He just text me how much fun he had. See being patient and not anxious pays off!! Thank you for your advice. It really helped💛
Bray1567 in reply to
I don’t call it anxious. You are both adults and lived long enough to know hey I enjoyed myself let’s continue. I call it a woman who knows what she wants and have no time waste. Men actually love women that show they are not here to waste time or play games. Follow your instincts, they never lead you wrong. Feel confident never anxious you are Queen. I hope things turn out great for you two.
in reply to Bray1567
Thanks Bray1567. No matter what happens, this was a great healthy first step back into dating. Fingers crossed🤞
It’s a new year filled with new adventures ahead. I have a good feeling this is going to go well. Yes I know I am a stranger but I have this really optimistic and joy feeling towards your situation and it’s usually never wrong.
in reply to Bray1567
I love that optimism. Thank you. There were so many dark years but now I feel this lightness in my heart. I love sharing it with you all😊
Wait. I'm old school. I think the guy likes to sweep you off your feet and romance you. Let him.
in reply to
I know that’s true but my anxiety would interfere before. Now I’m managing my symptoms and letting him show me how to be romanced. Never trusted that much to let that happen before. I am a prize to be won. Wow, who is this person?? I don’t recognize me🤯😊
in reply to
I'm proud of you. A new love is so exciting. Remember you do teach the guy how to treat you and try to not bring up negatives from before. You are both new people.
in reply to
Funny thing is we tried dating 5 years ago when I was in the darkest place in my life. It didn’t work out then of course but I’ve worked hard in 5 years with deep intensive therapy, major life changes and I even lost 65 pounds. I felt so proud on our date. I like he knew me then. No need to explain where I came from. I love your response. Exactly what I needed to hear 💛
Downandout123 in reply to
I couldn't agree more!
in reply to Downandout123
Thank you the encouragement is really helping with the anxious energy💛
After my divorce and when I was out there again I decided I did it all wrong with my first husband and took a different approach. I let him woo me. I let him ask me out and call me. I wasn't always readily available. I waited for six weeks for a first kiss. I waited for him to say I love you first. We waited a long while before sex etc. I basically let him court me and if course it all worked well.
in reply to
Omg I want that. I feel good about this. He text last night a very respectfully but flirty said how much he enjoyed our date🥰
in reply to
That's a great sign. Good luck.
in reply to
Thanks Melhall🤞
My opinion is text him
in reply to DJB74
He texted me! We had a good little text conversation last night. I’m being patient. My tendency is to try to control because of anxiety but not this time 😊
Butmaybe hes waiting to see if hes going too fast after all youve been through. So you messaging and ahowing eagerness may push him to continue his pursuit
in reply to DJB74
I hadn’t thought of that. Thank you. I like hearing a man’s perspective
No problem. Im so happy for you. I hope all goes well. If you ever need advice,, hit me up
Wow everyone weighed on this one. Go with the flow, be yourself and don’t let more then 24 to 48 hours go by in my opinion. Keep the spark alive! Remember it’s only 1 date and 1 guy out of millions and you can’t go wrong! Best
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