Humans suck

[LordKnowsImTrying]

I spend so much time checking on people I care about. I call and text, especially when I know they are in need of support. Im always the strong one who keeps a smiling face or an encouraging word. Guess who checks on me when Im drowning? No one. I struggle alone.

[senorab12]

This is me 100%. Right now I’m struggling and literally my phone is dead, no one texts me or calls me. I feel like I could disappear right now and no one would notice.

[EleanorRose]

I really feel this too ❤️

So sorry you’re experiencing this. I’m always here if you want to chat

[Hidden]

I didn’t know how to cultivate healthy relationships I used to be grateful for just anything. Now I’m looking for kind human beings and that takes me fixing my vibe. I must look like a mistrustful shelter dog but it’s also a challenge getting out there. Feeling like time is running out feeling like my face is turning into a baseball mitt all wrinkled and sliding down my skull. Feeling insecure about attempting to go to groups or public places and saying hey do you want to get a coffee or go for a walk sometime? Explaining that I’ve been single for 12 years is scary, trying to explain I’ve been working on myself.

So I’ll go meditate for as long as I can and say some affirmations to reset my paradigm. 1000 affirmations a day. Keep trying to change my vibe by watching comedy and listening to comedy. Improving my posture and trying to get more exercise more water man such a small amount of time for anyone else.

[LordKnowsImTrying in reply to Hidden]

Ive been thinking all day of joining a gym, but I cant get out of bed today. And I know I wont be consistent once I feel like myself again. Depression brings out a bunch of “coulds, woulds and shoulds” that I never do when I have the opportunity.

[Hidden in reply to LordKnowsImTrying]

Maybe before you going to the trouble of joining a gym make the Coach Carter challenge and do 1000 push ups in a week. Even if they are wall push ups it’s still something and after wall push-ups you can do chair pushups and then after that floor push-up.

[LordKnowsImTrying in reply to Hidden]

Message me. Id like to hear more.

[sweetiepye]

If you are the person who helps and supports others you probably don't appear to need help. In which case you must let people know your circumstances. I don't think you're being ignored as much as misunderstood. There is no shame in needing and asking for help. Pam

[NeuronerdDoaty]

Well stop it. Pick a few who you notice care about you whether they always check on you or not. (My friend Susan doesn’t always check on me but her life is busy raising her 3 small grandkids. I’ll stick with her.)

It’s not our responsibility to be the keeper of the people. You’re overworking yourself. Pick a few good ones who are smart enough to reciprocate when needed.

I only care that you’re well and happy.

Doaty💛

[Poodie]

I feel much better when I let a few people know how I am and what I need. I asked one of my sons to come over today and told him 3 things I needed help with. Like please play with the puppy because he has way too much energy for me right now, pick up my mail, and bring some food over so we can have lunch together. I think it made him feel good to help. I don’t like to burden him w my depressed mood because he has his own life to live., but he does not mind helping out.

At first I wasn’t calling or reaching out to anyone. So one friend called and she is someone who understands and I know I can reach out to her. I think your should pick a couple people you think are kind and caring. Start to get what you need and pay attention to yourself. If none of them respond, you need to find others you have something in common with.

And of course there are people on here to help too.

[Hidden]

I know exactly what you are talking about, however I don't ever really expect others to help back. Still it would be nice to be asked "how are you doing?". I was curious why this was and asked one guy who I am always helping. He really thought I was just fine since I always seem happy. Casting a facade and always helping other with high anxiety does a good job of hiding my feelings well, too well. At some point , especially when I'm alone, I tend to break down in my bedroom late night preventing me from sleeping. With people you really are close too you have to let down your guards so they know when you're in distress. If you don't have people like that in your life, well come here and post in your time of need. Like you're doing now. Either others or me, will come listen and/or provide feedback when you need it most. Feel free to private message me directly if you just want or need to talk.

I've been there.

[fauxartist]

I learned not to always be the 'go to guy' for others and their problem solving....because then everyone thinks you don't have any of your own problems, and can't understand that you would ever have a problem because you always seem to know what to say. So now I have learned to make it very clear to be empathetic...meaning I let someone know I understand because I go through it too...and that I too have good and bad days, and need support on my bad days too, to help pull me out of them just like others with this disease do.

Sometimes you have to tell people what you need, we can't expect them to have ESP and know what we need unless we tell them. Having expectations that people should just know when we need help, or be there for us only leads to disappointment. And yes, some people are emotional vampires and suck the life out of you, dump all their problems on you, and then walk away with a smile on their face and your left there exhausted....then we learn to set boundaries.

[LordKnowsImTrying]

Im always self conscious about draining others with my problems. I never want to be “that” person.

[pink318]

Hello,

This is me. I always try to be there for my friend to give encouragement when they are down but when it’s my turn for support, I feel that I am alone. But I learned through reading and hearing sermons that I should not depend on them because it will just disappoint me. I used to be so upset when I’m expecting help from someone but now even though it’s hard, I try to find comfort through writing down my emotions in my journal, singing worship songs and listening to sermons.

I have a life group whom I can also share about my life experience and it helps me to feel less lonely. I hope you will soon feel better as you find ways that will work for you.

I’m sorry you feel this way. Please remember that you are not alone. We are here for you and you can talk to us anytime. Praying for you for peace and you will get through this. Take care.

[LordKnowsImTrying in reply to pink318]

I listened to a “friend” of mine about her work and relationship issues for weeks. As soon as I started having issues at work, she was cold and distant. We dont even talk anymore. We are cordial in mixed crowds, but thats it. As soon as I was in trouble and flailing, she swam away. Smh.

[LiveandLetLive42]

We’re here for you!! I totally get it though. I finally dropped some friends because enough was enough. People are just very self centered and busy with their own crap. Not everyone is like us who cares about people and how they’re doing. I’m sorry. But you’ve got us!