Worst Case Scenario

[Giraffe2]

Does anyone find themselves always going to the worst case scenario?!? And obsessing over it so much that you 100% believe it is going to happen? If so I’d love suggestions as to how to stop.

Long story short, my husband is going away this weekend and I have pretty much convinced myself something horrible is going to happen to him. So much so, I’m basically planning how I’d tell our two kids, and visualizing everything after that (a funeral, etc).

I cannot get this out of my head and feel sick (and crazy). Does anyone have experience with this? Thanks in advance.

[Jeff1943]

Giraffe2, when we experience high anxiety our nerves become over sensitive and in this state we exaggerate the smallest problem, worry or concern. So what you describe is quite normal for people with anxiety disorder.

For example, the normal concern not to die before our time can become an obsession that our death is imminent. A slight headache must be a brain tumour. A new boss means we're definitely going to lose our job. Always the worst case scenario?

In your case the normal mild concern about your husband being away travelling is magnified tenfold into the belief in his certain demise.

So what do you do: try to forget about it or try and fight it? No, you must let the strange ideas come and accept them for the time being. These thoughts cannot harm you or your husband, you know that, so just accept the thoughts and the bad feelings without fear or resentment.

Do not add second fear to the flash of first fear, just accept for the moment. This gives your nervous system a break from the fear hormones you have been bombarding it with.

Then let time pass, lots of time. Eventually your sensitised nerves will recover and will no longer bother you with exaggerated reactions. All will be well.

[LaPetiteGen]

Know that you aren't alone. Even folks that don't suffer with anxiety experience irrational fears. Life is complicated and none of us have control really over anything- except our breath. I learned this during a session with my doctor to help me come out of the anxious "fight or flight" state. When I feel like I'm starting to get out of control- I stop, recognize my thoughts/fears/anxiety. Take a deep breath through my nose for count of 4- hold for 7 and then exhale slowly through my mouth for a count of 8. I do this four times in a row. Gives me time to focus only on my breathing and calm my nervous system. Very practical way to calm down. I'm learning that I have a control problem and instead of seeing it as a negative I'm extending grace and kindness to myself. I've been married to a police officer for almost 30 years- my only child joined the military and survived a tour in Afghanistan. I've had so many times in my life that those I loved the most were in actual real danger I know what's it like to think worst case scenario. So I truly do understand. In my worst fretting moments- the only thing that's helped me is turning everything over to God. Acknowledging I have no control and that whatever the outcome God still loves me and will give me what I need to survive. I try to cover all my basis- mind, body and spiritual. Praying you find peace and techniques that will work for you!