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Health anxiety at its worst

dbeck128 profile image
32 Replies

I wanted to start off by apologizing that I haven't been on here much lately to encourage others. Quite selfish of me, but I've been sleeping and working... will be on soon to give some encouragement.

But for now, my health anxiety is killing me. It's a demon.

For example today, I've had a varicose vein that has popped. Very tiny. Of course I googled to see if they were fatal and see a clot could form in your leg ..... great. Now I'm going to die of that. My left side feels less sensitive to touch than my other. Am I having a stroke? My head has a weird buzzing sensation that comes and goes.. do I have brain cancer? My eyes are really bad with floaters that wont go away, do I have a tumor on my brain? The list goes on and I live EVERY day in fear that I'll die a new death. I dont believe in myself because when my gallbladder went out a couple years ago, I told myself nothing was wrong until I ended up in the er. Now I feel like I cant trust myself and need to be checked every other day with blood work or scans. Help me dear God. Please help..

Can anyone help with coping skills?

I also included a pic of my little burst. Maybe someone with varicose veins can give me some info? Greatly appreciated... also it does look a little worse because my sock has been sitting on it.

Oh and P PS lol....tomorrow my little family and I are going to Laguna beach. Cant help but overthink I'll die of flesh eating bacteria. Living the life over here.

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dbeck128 profile image
dbeck128
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32 Replies
NeuronerdDoaty profile image
NeuronerdDoaty

Is that your leg? I don’t see the bruising I’m used to seeing in the ER with a popped vein. IMHO the vein was shallow, just in a bad place. Do you have spider veins?

This type of anxiety is really GAD; generalized anxiety disorder. Your brain decided to pick health issues. My brain picked something else. If you can begin to tell yourself that it’s not truly your numb side that you’re anxious about (it takes talking out loud and practice) you’ll begin to quell the anxiety. I talk to myself like I’m calming a child. Talking out loud is important because the more senses/parts of the brain you involve, the more likely you are to have success.

Almost everyone gets the gallbladder wrong. Even when they’re right it’s hard to tell when to take it out. It’s a tricky little bugger.

Nice deep breaths and tell yourself this ball of anxiety grabbed on to your health. You’re feelings are valid but let a doctor tell you if you have something. We can’t do our own MRIs can we?

I’m so sorry it attacked you this way. I hope you find relief and please make sure the doctor follows you with blood work on that.

Doaty

dbeck128 profile image
dbeck128 in reply to NeuronerdDoaty

Thank you. I want to stop worrying. It gets tiring fighting! I have very poor circulation in my feet. They're always cold and am flat footed and I work in a hospital, so I'm on my feet all day. And I know that's where part of my anxiety stems from. Seeing patients in critical condition and never making a return. It sucks.

SpiritualT profile image
SpiritualT in reply to dbeck128

Me too. I work in a hospital and I suffer with severe health anxiety

NeuronerdDoaty profile image
NeuronerdDoaty in reply to dbeck128

I have done some form of patient care for 30 years. May I suggest you talk to a therapist regarding First Responder or C-PTSD symptoms. Most of us have them. Cognitive Behavior Therapy works well for us. Best of luck my friend💛

Doaty

Bluemusical profile image
Bluemusical in reply to NeuronerdDoaty

Thank you for this suggestion. I just had my third kid and developed anxiety. I feel like it developed with this baby, partly because of the stress of having a third child, but mostly because I started having to work and visit people in the hospital. I have been seeing a counselor and she has said I would benefit from therapy for PTSD but I kind of dismissed it. I think I will look into it more seriously now. Thank you!!

I work in the vein business as a nurse. A varicose vein is a superficial vein and will not have life threatening consequences. Wear compression stockings and see a doc. Not a fatal disease.

dbeck128 profile image
dbeck128 in reply to

Oh man that makes me feel better. I have poor circulation in my feet and am flat footed. Idk if it has anything to do with it

Horizon_123 profile image
Horizon_123 in reply to

yes ,my cousins always wear his long socks on his affected leg . He says that it prevent swelling.

NeuronerdDoaty profile image
NeuronerdDoaty in reply to

You’re wonderful👍

I’m sorry about your vein, the anxiety, and worry.

Seeing the picture you posted makes me want to say just one thing: I seriously love you shoes and socks!!! 👟 🧦 💕🙂

dbeck128 profile image
dbeck128 in reply to

Thankyou! Lol I just got new shoes

Horizon_123 profile image
Horizon_123

my cousin brother is suffering from this as well. But his situation is worst , fully spread all over his left leg . His two sons are in grade 2and pre-nursery.

He diagnosed it 5yrs before and suffer from pain whenever he has to stand all the time. But his family supports him and thats matter.

I don't know what to write to make you feel mentally stronger.

But always remember one thing "no matter what ,in your good or bad, in your ups and down ,your family will always with you. Even if you don't say to them ,your eyes will say it and this will in return. Hurt them."

so, stop worrying ,if you don't want them to worry. Go Beach, Have fun with your family.

wishing you your best years ahead ,full of happiness and success.😊

dbeck128 profile image
dbeck128 in reply to Horizon_123

What was he diagnosed with? And what was worse? Its just a little spot....I work at a hospital and am tempted to see a nurse.

Horizon_123 profile image
Horizon_123 in reply to dbeck128

he is diagnosed with varicose vein and now it had spread all over his leg . Doc said that it will start again even after operating . So he advised him to wear long compression socks and advised him to put less pressure on his leg.

Horizon_123 profile image
Horizon_123

and if you have not diagnosed it yet. Let it diagnosed.May be its not what you think or if it is .

dbeck128 profile image
dbeck128 in reply to Horizon_123

What test did they run?

Horizon_123 profile image
Horizon_123 in reply to dbeck128

sorry , I don't have that idea but if you visit hospital they will surely diagnose it

Horizon_123 profile image
Horizon_123 in reply to Horizon_123

I am not sure but it include physical examination, ultrasound or magnetic resonance of veins which can identify clots in veins

in reply to dbeck128

They would do an ultrasound called a duplex to diagnose reflux where the valves don't return the blood upwards in the deeper veins called saphenous veins causing the smaller varicose veins. There are procedures to shut down those veins and then injections to one's that you can see. That's what I do, the ultrasound during the surgeries and the injections to follow.

Want2BHappy3 profile image
Want2BHappy3

No need to apologise, we're out there living LIFE. Are you in counseling? I didn't read it anywhere?

dbeck128 profile image
dbeck128 in reply to Want2BHappy3

I was, but got taken off Medicaid. sadly I can't afford It out of pocket......funny how the healthcare system is here....and they wonder why we "dont reach out for help".... we do, we just cant afford the help.....

Want2BHappy3 profile image
Want2BHappy3 in reply to dbeck128

To Hats too bad, do you live in the USA? You can go to the country?

gbn_ profile image
gbn_

Hi dbeck128. Just read your postings now. I see that you work in a hospital. Did you have this type of anxiety before, or after you started working there? Anxiety takes on many forms, years ago I suffered with this type also. I don't have to tell you, because I'm sure you realize, working in a hospital atmosphere can really, really compound this state you are in. It's only natural. Doctors themselves also sometimes suffer with this. The stress with working there (no matter what job you have there) could be the major contributing factor, along with everything else going on with patients. It takes a very strong will to look past these things and brush them off. What helped me was finding a hobby that took my thoughts away, and joining a gym to fully engulf myself with exercise for a better mental outlook. It didn't happen overnight, but, with doing natural things and eating better, it really helped me.

Crochetattic profile image
Crochetattic in reply to gbn_

I also have anxiety for years would come and go now since 2017 I have health anxiety terrible and so many physical symptoms and justed turn 65. I hate it go to cognitive therapy and tried many antidepressants even had the gene testing but nothing helps. I have neck problems which make it worse but want to visit my Mama who will turn 88 on 21 this month but can’t make that 3 hour drive that’s how bad mine is. I pray I go to see her and able to before something hapoens😩 trying hard

Tjgg profile image
Tjgg

Hi there!

Fist of all....PLEASE STOP GOOGLING SYNTOMS it will make your anxiety worst. I've deal with health anxiety since my dad was diagnosed with cancer In 2018 and I had my ups and downs. I know it is hard and it is easy to look at something new in your body and think the worst. Please STOP

You need to look for help, I will suggest maybe a counselor or a professional therapist. It will really help.

In the mid time write things down, write what is in your head, you need to let things out.

Drink magnesium

Herbal teas

Stop caffeine

Sleep well

Take care of yourself ( read a book, get a manicure/pedi)

Exercise

Watch what you eat, I have notice that the more I ate refinated sugars the worst I felt.

And last but not least talk to God. He has been helping me, read the bible, go to church.

It's a process, your anxiety won't dissapear from one day to another but you will learn to manage it.

Kkimm profile image
Kkimm

Hi dbeck.

It really is essential to stop googling symptoms as Tjgg said. I know it is really difficult, I have been there. I did it by saying to myself, OK I have probably got one of these conditions and if I have I will have to accept it and live with it, or if I die, I die. I made myself stop from then on and the symptoms actually started to disappear. The chances of you having these things are so slim it is quite safe for you to take this fatalistic approach. It is ruining your life to continue so try to bite the bullet and just see what fate throws at you and I am sure you will find you have none of these things and will be able to start living again. Easier said than done I know, but you CAN do it.

Very best wishes.

Kim

Reallife72 profile image
Reallife72

Hi dbeck. I am sorry you are going through this too. And I am glad you decided to post. I am going through the exact thing with the HA right now. There is some good advice in the thread. Glad I checked my email this morning because I woke up like this. I just had my gallbladder out last week. It had been nagging me for a few years though. I wanted you to know that you are not alone in this struggle. I have been dealing with HA for about 4 years now. I am 47. I have been on my knees asking God for help for a few days now and I plan on being persistent. I have been taking AD for years. They don’t seem to do much anymore except maybe keep panic attacks away. And I don’t know what the deal is with vacation but every time we go my HA skyrockets!! I will be thinking well this could be our last vacation together or last time I see these relatives. I don’t know if anyone else does this. It’s so bad that I avoid going out of town at all anymore. I stay off fb and don’t watch too much tv. I always see something that makes it worse. Please stay in touch and let me know how you are doing. In the meantime I will be talking out loud to myself and praying! ((Hugs))

akablonded profile image
akablonded

This doesn't address your vein issue, but the anxiety you're feeling. My anxiety "try this, it might work for you" coping mechanism: when I experienced the kind of generalized anxiety you're describing (one thing leading to a bigger thing and then to an even bigger thing) I try to short circuit it with, of all things, something that smells good to me. My particular scent is honeysuckle. It reminds me of summer and blue skies and happy times. It makes me smile and stop for a little while, to help me deal with whatever is going on. I carry a small vial of honeysuckle essence with me. It doesn't have to be a flower scent. It can be whatever makes you feel good or calm ... vanilla, pumpkin spice, maybe even suntan lotion. It can't hurt to try, while you're dealing with your larger issues.

sarellano26 profile image
sarellano26

Hiiii I read this and is like hearing myself everyday!!!! Same syntoms and same thoughts in my head !!! Same same same !!!!! I just can tell you I am trying to live everyday and think that god is tooooo big and tooo good and that I trust him so I don’t have to worry about what I have.... is very hard but it helps to know that your body is smart and that it heals :)

God bless you

Reallife72 profile image
Reallife72 in reply to sarellano26

Hi sarellano. It does make us feel a little better to know we are not the only ones that struggle with this.

j49053 profile image
j49053

All of us are amazing isnt it? Im reading experiences shared by all of us on our GAD and HA and depression and most of us had been living with these conditions for years and here we are... doing good! All those catastrophising didnt manifest. Unfortunately despite not manifesting, we are still imprison by these negativity. Sometimes i wonder how did we survive all those years?!

Freeride profile image
Freeride

I'm not sure how long ago this was posted.... but I suffer from the same :( health anxiety. I suffer from varicose veins in my legs... I'm 25. They've gotten a lot worse since my 2 pregnancies.

Besides that just general anxiety disorder . Sorry to say but its comforting to hear I'm not alone. I worry that one day I'll stress myself to death.

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