I can’t stop thinking about this - Social Anxiety Disorder anyone relates to this or am I crazy?

[itgetsbetter5]

I have to travel to London for work so I’m on trains and tubes most of the time and everytime I do I get so anxious about maybe coming across suspicious to other people because guess what I probably look anxious as hell! I just feel like everytime someone stares at me for too long is that because I’m being checked out by officers or staff, I also caught a guy taking a photo of me last night! Anyone have any advise how I can cope better and think of similar thoughts??

[Hidden]

I feel when we struggle with anxiety, our minds play tricks on us in situations we are anxious in....I too can feel people are checking me out...and I feel a bit paranoid around it all...

Distractions can help. Appreciate it can be difficult to distract on tube, and what works for one won’t always work for another..

I don’t like tubes at all..and fortunately I rarely get on them...when I travel to London I don’t mind the train..

A distraction for me is looking at photos on my phone or a magazine..with brief stories in..not paying as much attention to people helps ..as my mind can make up all sorts of things..

Good wishes to you x

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Ps I struggle with social anxiety too

[itgetsbetter5 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you for replying, I do try to distract myself and use my phone all the time and listen to music but sometimes I’d look up and see someone looking at me from far across and they dont even divert their gaze when I look back. I have noticed that it seems to happen when I’m feeling anxious already and really low so it could be that.. I currently bought a self help book about paranoid thoughts and hopefully by doing more exposure exercises apart from travelling to work will help me.. Best wishes to you too 💜

[Kkimm]

Hi

Remember others will be worrying about how they look and not thinking about you at all.

Very best wishes

Kim

[itgetsbetter5 in reply to Kkimm]

I do try to think of it that way and most of the time it is men that do stare..maybe it is just my anxiety interpreting it a different way.. thank you for responding.. Very best wishes to you too 💚

[Kkimm in reply to itgetsbetter5]

No sure if you're a guy or a girl but either way I suppose it is probably because they fancy you.

However you should not have to put up with it when it is unwelcome. Just look at something else or your phone as most of the people in the carriage do I guess.

Another tactic is to look around you rather than at your phone. I think that people feel free to stare if they think you are fully occupied and are unlikely to catch them doing it. That would also be why the bloke thought he could get away with taking a photo.

I am a bit old for that sort of unwelcome attention but I know it is becoming a real issue for women particularly. I do remember it as a bit of an issue when younger however. I think I just used to look away if I was on my own. We did not have phones then but perhaps had a book to read.

I did not suffer social anxiety then or now but both my daughter and my partner do at times. I have GAD but am pretty well recovered. I do have real sympathy however as I understand how difficult it is.

I think there is no way that it is staff or officers or because you look nervous.

People are generally not that perceptive or even interested.

All the best

Kim

[itgetsbetter5 in reply to Kkimm]

Thank you for sharing your experience. I do most of the time look down on my phone but at times I look up I see someone looking and I can’t think but over analyse what I could have looked like to them that made them look, this often ends up me thinking they must think theres something dodgy about me! And quite frankly I somehow feel like I carry this label around me everywhere which has become distressing at times.

I worry about what I look like to staff ,bouncers or securities all the time because I’m afraid they’d think the same of what I think about myself.

I have my ups and downs but I hope it will get better eventually.

Wishing you the best 💚💚💚

[Abigaile]

I too work in central & I always have head phones on & a book- I don’t even have music on- it’s just a barrier! And I use the book to shut myself away x