Hello guys i need advice

[Manu79]

I been dealing with anxiety and depression for a while now i was on antidepressants for two years and i weaned my self off because i dont think they help me,i still feel like crap on or without them, i have a very strong anxiety in public places especially hospitals and clinics i feel like iam gonna lose control and have a mayor panic attack, i know i need help but im so scared they gonna put me in a ward.. i dont know what to do, im not suicidal but iam very hopeless and desperate i cant even leave the house. I was prescribe alprazolam for panic attacks but i don’t take it all the time i don’t want to become addicted plus it makes me very sleepy. What should i do?

[EleanorRose]

Do you have someone you could leave the house with? Maybe going for a walk with a friend. Panic attacks are horrible to experience but harmless. It's understandable that you wouldn't want to have a panic attack in public but nothing bad would happen, try to remind yourself of that. Going out with a friend or family member might make you feel more safe to do so.

I think deep down you know the answer here. You have said, "I know I need help." I think this is a situation which requires huge courage and may cause temporary fear or discomfort but will be for the best in the long run. Make an appointment with the doctor and take someone with you for support if you can - you can explain to them your medication concerns and they will be able to advise you. Nothing bad will happen and you need to get yourself the support you need and deserve. 'Future' you will be grateful that you did it.

[Manu79 in reply to EleanorRose]

I know you are right Eleanor, im so scared of the panick attacks i feel like im going to die, last time i went to a clinic i got so anxious that they had to give me a pill to lower my blood pressure,i hate it because i feel defenseless like i have no control over it...thanks for your advice

[jocie609]

I agree with Eleanor Rose and I thank her for reminding me that panic attacks are harmless however they do feel like major life-ending moments when they are happening. I too have been dealing with anxiety for a long time and sometimes they cause me to have panic attacks as well. I do not want them to stop me from daily activities so I do ask people to come with me to the store, the mall, on a walk, to doctor visits, etc when they can. If not, then I try my best to talk to myself and remind myself that I still have to do and enjoy life so I pray (not all the time...I gotta work on this) and ask God to help me. I think you should ask someone to go with you to the doctors and maybe that will help you. I do think that the "you" in the future deserves it. I have to take my own advice though because I dont really like prescription medications...

[Manu79 in reply to jocie609]

Thank you jocie609 you are right but i feel like i need to go see a doctor because i feel weird pain in my chest and left side of my neck that makes me more anxious.. im gonna have to ask somebody to go with me but i don’t wanna bug one of my friends they are always busy with their kids and family, iam alone here

[jocie609 in reply to Manu79]

I dont think that they would opposed to you asking them to come to the doctors with you. It doesnt hurt to go get yourself checked out because anxiety symptoms sometimes can mimic heart issues symptoms. I know because I have been to the ER two times this year for that same reason. Both times I was fine but I was so anxious that I couldnt function until i got checked out. Just ask and see what happens.

[Manu79 in reply to jocie609]

I will.. thank you

[Want2BHappy3]

Did they tell you their addictive? You need to change Medication's till you find one that works? And be patient? Most meds take about 6 weeks to take effect. Not everything is going to work for everybody? Change doctors if you have to, I have.

[Manu79 in reply to Want2BHappy3]

Hello thanks for your reply but I already tried most SSRIs with no results and i know benzos are addictive so i try to stay away from them..i wish i could find some relief without drugs

[Want2BHappy3 in reply to Manu79]

Have you tried Mirtazapine? This worked for me

[Manu79 in reply to Want2BHappy3]

I have not, honestly im scared to take more antidepressants, they make me feel worst

[RubbinBrows]

Hello. It sounds like you made a courageous decision to quit that medication. I quit my meds 2 months ago and feel so much better. Medication is a cover up in my opinion. If you dont deal with the issues you have they wont go away. I have had the worst social anxiety and spurts of depression. My anxiety is almost nonexistent now. I am learning to not listen to my thoughts as much as I used to. You are not your thoughts. You have a brain that trys to keep you safe and comfortable. It will make up stories, assumptions, and excuses for it to achieve those goals. When you start to "think" or feel you are having anxiety, try to actually step back from your mind and just observe your thoughts in the moment. You can hear them, feel them, but you dont have to be them. You have choice to believe them or not to believe them. This little piece of advice has change my life so quickly. Being uncomfortable and having fear in certain situations is actually a great thing. You see it as a bad thing but it is not. Having fear is just your brain telling you that you are uncomfortable and thia could possibly be unsafe because you don't do them enough. Force yourself and push through the fear. When you push through fear, you grow. When you submit to the fear, you shrink. This can also make you drpressed and less confident because when tou submit as a human you don't feel any progress being made. It is an endless cycle. Fear will NEVER go away. And guess what? It doesn't need to. All you need to do is step back, dont be your thoughts, just observe them. Push through fear everytime. I promise you wont die... You will start to feel that control that you are looking for and you will see the strength that you have been hiding. Feeling and thoughts are only what you decide they are. Try to listen for free to a couple of audio books that helped me out a lot. One is called, "Feel the fear and do it anyway. The other book is, "Rejection Proof". We are all humans and everyone has feeling like these. Try to take the attention off yourself and focus on others. Most people dont care what happening in your life because they are usually to busy thinking are theirs. I know you will fomd the peace your looking for. God Bless!

[Manu79 in reply to RubbinBrows]

Thank you so much for replying...i know i have to deal with my issues and not listen to my thoughts but is really hard for me to calm myself down..im terrified of a panic attack especially in public places like movie theaters and malls.. i expose myself to this places and it’s always the same every single time, all i want to do is get out of there, and if i stay i feel very anxious that i can’t enjoy the movie.. i heard that by exposing my self to this situations it would get better and less scary but not in my case, its always the same

[Agora1 in reply to RubbinBrows]

RubbinBrows, you speak the truth. We are not our thoughts.

Thank you for sharing a great response. Continued success to you xx

[RubbinBrows]

Hello. All I can tell you is what helped me. Look at your feelings when they are happening in the moment. Step back and look at them. There is nothing scary about them at all. It is what you tell yourself is what it becomes. Exercise more, eat better, and stop focusing on how you feel. Focus on other people, what they look like, what they might be going through, what they are doing etc. Stop thinking about yourself and looking inward all the time. Look outward, thats where the world is. Your feelings are totally controllable if you break your bad habits and replace them with good ones. Please try this. God bless!

[Manu79]

Thank you i will try that

[sudoremi]

Manu, I think RubbinBrows is right. Stay outside of yourself. Try humor. I like to take absurd fears and make them more absurd to the point that the situation in my head becomes funny. It is a play on imagining everyone in the audience is in their underwear when you are public speaking. It also reminds you that you are in control of your thoughts and short circuits the anxiety feedback loop that kicks in and is hard to get out of. I know, easier said than done. Sometimes I do not even notice I am getting into that spiraling negative state of mind. It has been easier over the years to detect it earlier as I have become more self aware of my anxiety.

Take care and good luck. And God bless. Prayer is another way to change your perspective outside of yourself. I have found praying for others around me, even the other cars around me on the road gets me out of that feedback loop.

[Manu79 in reply to sudoremi]

Thank you very much for your words i really try to ignore my thoughts in situations that anxiety takes over my whole body.. its like iam powerless and defenseless, sometimes i go through the moment sometimes i run from it, i feel like i can't get rid of it, its always there

[sudoremi]

Manu79,

I am sorry to hear that. Most of my anxiety is in my mind, and it does trigger a physical response sometimes. When that happens, I need to walk around or exercise in some way. Problem is that most of the time it happens when I cannot move or change my location. I heard somewhere that doorways have a psychological effect, sort of a transition like a wipe effect in a tv show or movie. It is true for me. Leaving the room or area helps reset my mind. Maybe this can help you? Extra stimulus might help get you out of the loop?

I had a good therapist who told me that my anxiety is somewhat of a prey response. We are all aware of Flight and Fight, but there is also Freeze. He said it it like when you open the back-screen door at home and the bunny rabbit freezes in the grass when startled by the door. I noticed when riding my motorcycle, I see whitetail deer on the side of the road staring at the headlight and they are frozen. They tend to bolt across the road at the last minute (it is an even fight with a motorcycle, by me they weigh about 100-150 pounds 45-68 kg). If I beep my horn, it is enough stimulus to shock them out of the state they are in and they run back into the woods. Works for Squirrels and Chipmunks too! This is what I try to do for myself. The physical change of a room sometimes is enough to do it. I can go right back into the room, but my mind has reset itself.

I found riding motorcycles helps a lot. It is so engaging using all my limbs to operate it, and because of the intrinsic danger (I do not ride in the city, too much danger) keeps me alert to road conditions and everything around me. I only think 10 seconds ahead and 2 seconds behind. When I am in that "zone" I am fully present and not worrying. Maybe an engaging hobby can help that is engrossing. I also play drums. That helps because it is so engaging. The more time I spend in that state of mind the better I feel overall. I really don't fish or hunt, but the guys I know who do talk about the same "zone" as when I am riding. They are totally alert to all inputs around them, busy listening and watching the woods, or creating a mental picture of what the fish and weather are doing to influence the catch.

I think modern life is too cranial and our bodies crave the challenges of pre-industrial life and it creates anxiety. The hard part is finding a way to have time to do it, or when at work or in the car to have an acceptable analog.

Hang in there. Get to know your mind and find a way to forget your mind. Also, keep searching for a good therapist. Many are competent, but you may not connect with them in a way that will help.